A Firesign Chat
12/05/2002




Archive


Special appearance by
Phil Austin

||||||||| Catherwood re-enters the Waiting Room and explains "This is the main discussion room which is logged each night."
||||||||| Catherwood announces, "The time is 4:33 AM - I now declare Thursday's chat log for December 05, 2002 officially open!"... and then, he retires back to the vestibule...
||||||||| Catherwood strides in with a trumpet, plays a fanfare, and proclaims "Nine PM on Thursday, December 05, 2002 - I now declare alt.comedy.firesgn-thtre's chat officially open!" -- then he looks around at the empty room, looks at his watch, and mumbles "...am I early?"
||||||||| Catherwood trudges in at 9:11 PM, dragging Merlyn LeRoy by one foot and asks "Can anyone vouch for this bozo?"
Merlyn LeRoy: Hmm, 16 minutes fast...
||||||||| Catherwood ushers JustAMinuteFlatFoot into the room, accepts a grimy quarter as a gratuity, mumbles something about 9:14 PM, then departs.
Merlyn LeRoy: hello
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: howdy
Merlyn LeRoy: slow so far...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: so it seems
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: New time: Thursday, December 05, 2002 20:00:02CST
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: according to About Time
||||||||| cease imril enters at 9:17 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and runs off to the Haberdashery Barn.
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: Hi cat
cease imril: hello again
Merlyn LeRoy: hey cat!
Merlyn LeRoy: hey flatfoot, who R U?
cease imril: i've just returned from rome
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood pipes up: "9:17 PM and late as usual, it's doctec_snowbound, just back from Billville."
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: how is the hot and humid Great Northern Rain forest tonight
doctec_snowbound: what happened to your nose!?
Merlyn LeRoy: what has happened to your nose?
cease imril: vancouver is cold. no surprise
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: snow bored as well?
doctec_snowbound: I just shoveled six inches of snow
cease imril: madrid was getting near vancouver in temp when we left last weekend
doctec_snowbound: it was a really tiny patch...
||||||||| Ken waltzes in at 9:19 PM carrying an obsidian door knocker.
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: have you seen Spider Robinson or Jeannie lately?
||||||||| Catherwood enters with Dexter Fong close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 9:19 PM tree-stunting plans, and runs off to the Aviary.
doctec_snowbound: no, really, we got six inches of snow coverage
Ken: good evening, dear friends
cease imril: do you know them?
doctec_snowbound: did Lili's driveway, walkways & porch
Ken: and cat! welcome back
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: why yes, he was our guest here in bama a few long years ago
Dexter Fong: Evening Dear Friends also...and a special hello to Cat =)
cease imril: hey kend. not in jail for geting that pornographic postcard?
doctec_snowbound: cat, i saw you tried to call my cell, have not listened to the msg yet... things have been so craaay-zee at this end post turkeyday weekend
cease imril: i met them most recently in may as i recall. bought his new cd, gave them copies of my latest
doctec_snowbound: i've barely had the time to eat/sleep/work my ass off
Ken: cat, porno, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. the usps gave it to me, they lost their chance then to nail me
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: ah, turkey day, and we all became indians
cease imril: of course, its turkey time for you yanks
doctec_snowbound: yank that turkey
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: oh, I mean incomprhensibles
Dexter Fong: Just: Except NPR which became chicken
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: ha
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: no surprize there
cease imril: too bad about npr
cease imril: maybe they think its giving aid and comfort to sadam
Merlyn LeRoy: BTW doc, fst.com bandwidth has been over 500kb/sec for about the last 2 weeks...don't know why, but that's higher than byron wants
Dexter Fong: NPR=National Poultry Reserve
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: it was a shorter piece than they wished for the slot maybe, yeah, that's the reason
Ken: dex: should we do a nice chicken marsala with them?
doctec_snowbound: brb
Dexter Fong: Lemme catch my Torri
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: 500 KB/sec is a LOT of width, is that costing more for them hosts?
Merlyn LeRoy: I think they had more bits to pad it out to 7-8 minutes, but without PTIP they couldn't run the rest
cease imril: i spoke with david ossman earlier this week and he seemed to think the xmas show would be broadcast
||||||||| Catherwood enters with Dave close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 9:23 PM tree-stunting plans, and runs off to the Aviary.
Ken: you mean the xmas show will be "comprehensible"?
cease imril: so its not as if the firesign has been shut out of npr
Dexter Fong: Hey Dave
cease imril: and speaking of daves,
Ken: hi dave
Merlyn LeRoy: "Firesign Theatre: now with comprehensible"
Dexter Fong: I can dig it brother
Dave: hey guys and gals, I might not be on for long, I've got a lot of math homework, I'll say random things when I get the chance, say nice things about me when I'm gone, lol
Ken: i guess incomprehensible is much better than reprehensible. i've been called that before
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: but not lately Ken
doctec_snowbound: back...
Ken: dave, why wait until you're gone? you're a wonderful guy, a model for all of america, and a swell chap to boot
Dexter Fong: Ken: Thanks for the Spam Flash =)
cease imril: all of europe was incomprehensible
cease imril: i kept thinking, what are all these mexicans doing here?
doctec_snowbound: well, so far Byron has not said anything to me about the bandwidth issue since the last time it came up...
Dexter Fong: Ken: Boot out the door?
cease imril: then i realized, they live here
Ken: cat: did you get to the british isles at all? at least they speak a form of english there
Ken: dex: 9 1/2 wide for me
doctec_snowbound: ...and I'm figuring that with the XM show having been cancelled, the bandwidth usage should drop a bit
cease imril: just heathrow airport, twice. nice airport
Dave: hey boots, I need some of those with the weather, brb, gotta do some fucking useless shit that I don't understand
Dexter Fong: Ken: Is that in Ladies models or something else?
Merlyn LeRoy: probably. Like I say, I'm not sure why it's up.
doctec_snowbound: two pies are squared
Ken: i'm all man (last time i looked anyway)
Dexter Fong: K: Oh...those weren't your shoes?
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: don't look now, rocky, it's a horror
cease imril: for industry
Ken: my shoes are sitting by the back door, with puddles of melting snow under them.
cease imril: there's a museum of what look like roman shoe boxes in siena.
doctec_snowbound: in just seven says, i can make you a Man!
Ken: i hate winter. bah, humbug
Dexter Fong: Where there's no smoke, there's downsizing
cease imril: as we walked through it, kept saying, over and over, shoes for industry, shoes for the dead
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: told you to move to the south, years ago, dude
cease imril: have a picture of it somewhere
Ken: well, i'm all man except i DO eat quiche on occasion
Ken: yeah, flatfoot, i should be there
Dexter Fong: Eat quiche and tell?
Merlyn LeRoy: cat, shoot me your snail address so I can send you a firesign XM DVD
cease imril: quiche is better in france
doctec_snowbound: OK I have to take a break for a little bit - Lili just served some Insalata Caprese for us to appetize ourselves...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: all man here and I make quiche on occassion, ha
||||||||| doctec_snowbound runs out the back door as Mayor P'nisnose blasts through the front door holding a shotgun and shouting "Where's doctec_snowbound?! It's 9:29 PM and my ballot boxes haven't been stuffed yet!"
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood pipes up: "9:29 PM and late as usual, it's doctec_eating, just back from Billville."
doctec_eating: back in a short while
Ken: wow, can you appetize me also?
cease imril: i'm sure it'll taste better than any of the insalata caprese's we had
Merlyn LeRoy: you can just put the parentheses on, doc
Dave: MATH IN BRAILLE IS A FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT, well, paper and dots really, either way, I FUCKING HATE IT, imagine guys that your long division problems take up twelve lines and you can sometimes fit three problems a page
Dexter Fong: Ken: One pill makes you smaller
cease imril: no shit, dave
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: yeah, dave, it sucks
Merlyn LeRoy: dave, the decimal point must be hard to find
Ken: dave, it's got to be about as hard as roman numerals. every try division with them? (rhetorical question--i haven't either)
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: ha
Dexter Fong: Merl: =)
Ken: lol, brian!
cease imril: in reality roman numerals divide themselves, or just dissolve away
Dave: WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS SHIT, HOLD ON, GOTTA do MORE of IT
cease imril: a whole civilization you see dissolving before your eyes... but NOT fast ENOUGH
||||||||| the elevator boy waltzes in at 9:32 PM carrying an obsidian door knocker.
||||||||| At 9:32 PM, cease imril vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted!
Ken: hi, eleboy
Dexter Fong: Merl: How's the reaper this week?
the elevator boy: what prognostications???
Ken: yeah, i wanted to ask that too. couldn't sign on last week, but read the log. man, that reaper went wild
||||||||| Catherwood announces "It's 9:33 PM; let's see who falls in through our celebrity trap door!" -- he pulls a lever, and cat plummets onto the oriental shag rug.
Dexter Fong: Ken: It was a dicey situation
Ken: "don't fear the reaper" until the virtual becomes real
Merlyn LeRoy: Ok cat... but you vanished?
Dexter Fong: Cat: Land on you feet?
cat: i was lost, like adam and eve
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: do we count the elevator boy in the predictions?
Ken: dicey? give me 10 the hard way
cat: i tried to answer your msg to me, bf. dont know if i did or not
the elevator boy: I'll take 2 over easy
Dexter Fong: There you go again...it's always about size isn't it?
Merlyn LeRoy: there's some bug I haven't been able to fingure out...
Ken: with brown hash on the side
Merlyn LeRoy: yeah, I got your address cat, thanks
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: ah, has browns, I'll take two!
Dexter Fong: We cook the aggs in hash oil
the elevator boy: and a beer with egg on the bottom
Ken: but don't eat the brown acid!
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: *hash, err
the elevator boy: no - the brown acid is a suppository!
Ken: i'll pass, thank you very much. where suppositories go is one way for me, exit only
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: well, put it in your pouch then
Dave: hey elevator boy, can you take me up to the floor of insanity please?
Dexter Fong: JustA and E. Boy: have we talked before?
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: insanity is at the roof level Dave
the elevator boy: you mean up the down staircase?
Ken: A&E is one of my favorite channels
Dexter Fong: Man what a progressive school...Uppers in one staircase and downers on the other
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: yes, this is Mike C
Ken: dave: insanity is for those whose elevator does NOT go all the way to the top floor
the elevator boy: Ja. it's mrmuckle maskerading as an elevated boyd
Ken: ah, mike in alabama?
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: I usually get off between floors, myself
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: yes
Dexter Fong feeling foolish wonders who Dave C is and knows he will probably say duh when informed
Ken: is there a rule that we all should have revolving identies? if so, then i'll spend next week thinking of more for me :)
Dexter Fong: Hi Mr. Muckle honey =)
Ken: dex: mike c was a "long ago and in a galaxy far away" participant
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: well, Mike C is just so... plain, jane
the elevator boy: just watch THIS:
||||||||| Catherwood says "9:39 PM, time for SOMEONE to leave!", grabs the elevator boy by the collar and gives 'em the old bum's rush out the door
Dexter Fong: You mean IRC Ken?
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood pipes up: "9:39 PM and late as usual, it's mrmuckle, just back from Billville."
Ken: well before you came here
cat: an early irc person
mrmuckle: POOF!
Dexter Fong: No Poofters!!!!!!!!!!!!
mrmuckle: it's real virtual magic
Ken: a sci-fi maven if my mammary serves me correctly
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: welcome MrMuckle
Dave: um, Dex, what did you mean by that Dave C statement
cat: i was here for the first one, and this is the longest i've ever been away from the thursday chat
mrmuckle: Tank you...........
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: correct, I help run Con†Stellation (up to 21 now)
Ken: cat, we did miss you
cat: honey?
Dexter Fong: Dave: WHICH STATEMENT? SORRY BUT IT'S MOVING RAPIDLY
cat: i read the transcripts when i got to cybercafes
Dexter Fong: Jeeze sorry
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: he is a bit confused, Mike C and dave ?
Ken: honey is the digestive byproduct of bees and pollen. any more questions?
Dave: fuck it Dex, never mind
Merlyn LeRoy: dex, you were wondering who dave C was
cat: its was pleasent to read that i had another identity somewhere else, instead of just the guy at the table who doesnt speak our language
Merlyn LeRoy: you're confused, the horizon is moving up
Dave: this isn't easy with a screen reader, brb, more math, god I need to work harder
||||||||| Uncle Ernie waltzes in at 9:42 PM carrying an obsidian door knocker.
Dexter Fong: Merl: Yes and didn't recognize the name
Ken: hi ernie
Uncle Ernie: G'day Y'all!
cat: ern
Dexter Fong: No Merl: The screen is moving down
Uncle Ernie: cat!
mrmuckle: the width of my screen is fine, but I need it to be 3 feet tall...
Dexter Fong: Unca Ernie
Ken: here's a math problem for all of you. at its present rate, how long before this server clock comes "full circle' and we have the right time again?
Uncle Ernie: Sure Ken and you?
Uncle Ernie: Dex!
Ken: ernie: lol. no, i'm not. glad you are though :)
mrmuckle: Ken: are you speaking in Sidereal Time?
Uncle Ernie: Keeps me from killing people!
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood pipes up: "9:44 PM and late as usual, it's Elayne, just back from Billville."
cat: i read a sidderal newsweek the other day
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: I've been reading some of Jim Hogan's reflection on recently formed Venus on his site, interesting stuff
Dexter Fong: Hi Elayne
Ken: hey el
Elayne: Ah, I see the clock hasn't been fixed yet. Evenin' all!
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: hi Elayne
cat: hi ell
Uncle Ernie: Hi Elayne?
Elayne: So I'm now 45 years old, and tomorrow Robin turns 41 and DO turns...?
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: 68?
Ken: hogan, the author of something with "proteus" in the title that i remember faintly? i recall he's a decent author
Elayne: And rumor has it the upstairs idiots are finally moving out. (They just threw something VERY heavy down on their floor!)
cat: route 66
Uncle Ernie: Ah youth Elayne!
Elayne: Ah, 66. Thanks Cat.
Ken: hell, e, you're both spring chickens (temporarily frozen in winter wonderland)
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: yes, that's the one, he also worte Cradle of Saturn
Elayne: Yum, spring chickens, let's eat!
Dexter Fong: Boing
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: I'd srping for a chicken
Ken: i'll have to look him up next time i do the bookstore run. haven't read any good s-f lately
mrmuckle: a tasty cluck if I ever et one
Elayne: So why aren't the Firesign message boards UBB?
Elayne: I can't handle message boards that aren't UBB any more. Too confusing.
Ken: UBB? want to translate?
cat: i sure got a greater impression of comic art from europe,. el
Elayne: "Ultimate Bulletin Board." It's a kind of coding, that's a brand name for it. Don't know the generic.
Elayne: Sounds like y'all had a great time perusing the museums, Cat!
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: ah, I understand now
||||||||| Catherwood enters with Captain Equinox close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 9:47 PM tree-stunting plans, and runs off to the Aviary.
cat: good times and bad. lots of tedium. but great stuff like bosch in the prado last week
Elayne: In Europe they treat comics like =gasp!= another form of literature, and there's stuff for kids, adults, everyone.
Dexter Fong: This Is The Ultimate Bulletin Board: You have 37 days to live. That is all
Ken: i will pretend to understand ;)
Elayne: They don't have all the silly misconceptions they do here.
cat: i cant imagine neal gaiman without bosch
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: he still hasn't stunted that tree yet?
Elayne: Neither can he, I'll warrant. :)
cat: the spainies call him "el bosco". i kept expecting a dude with a red nose
Dexter Fong: Captame Equinox!!
Captain Equinox: The tree comes in shorts and quarts...
Ken: hi cap'n
Dexter Fong: Cat Hieronymous or Pear?
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: I'll take a pint
Ken: gimme half a litre
cat: aside from his triumph of death boschy, i was surprise how much the bruegels painted that wasnt bosch-like at all.
Captain Equinox: What litreship you display...
Dave: hey, gotta go, try to be on later, talk to ya during the week, see ya
Dexter Fong: Give that man an Imperious Galloon
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: bye dave
Ken: bye, dave
Dexter Fong: So long Dave
cat: great to see triumph of death in the prado with all the bosches, but then when you see a bunch of breugels somewhere, its just like a bunch of everyone else's only a lot smaller!
Uncle Ernie: Dave not here!
Captain Equinox: Davesnothere
cat: dave
Captain Equinox: beat me to it
Merlyn LeRoy: bye
Uncle Ernie: Thers an echo in here, in here,
Ken: cat: i was never really an art lover until i went to a museum for the first time. now, i want to see them all
Captain Equinox: in here
Dexter Fong: Dave's no there?
mrmuckle: where?
Merlyn LeRoy: the reaper will get him if he just disconnected
Ken: you don't get any real concept of it seeing it printed on a page
Uncle Ernie: How can you be in two places at once when you're not anywhere at all?
Dexter Fong: By the PJ PRoby dislpay
Captain Equinox: Are you back from the continent, Cat...?
Dexter Fong: UE: The magic of video tape
cat: and front, capt
Captain Equinox: an aside, if ever I heard one...
Uncle Ernie: Ah ...
Dexter Fong: CE: =)
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: in front, and incontinent, hummm
cat: "tapa-less bars." i loved it
mrmuckle: yes, but have you ever heard one from behind?
Dexter Fong: His jest has put me pant's afloat
Ken: depends.....
Captain Equinox: urine trouble now
cat: you're still at it.
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: oh no
Dexter Fong: I'm prosrtate
cat: or stool at it
Dexter Fong: Or something like it
Captain Equinox: that explains his at etude...
mrmuckle: pull up a wolf stool...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: you woound me sir
Uncle Ernie: Yes to stand up for a pricipal and to sit down on your own stool ...
Dexter Fong: I'll study that CE
Ken: mmm, toad stools :)
cat: somebody ate the etude?
Captain Equinox: first...second...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: fine
Ken: you can't eat an etude unless you do some chopin first
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: or fin
Dexter Fong: ...rounding third and being thrown out at home
cat: annie
Ken: i've never been thrown out at home. got locked out once though
Dexter Fong: Haddie
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: gets her gunnie?
cat: get your gums
Captain Equinox: I was thrown out of home at 13, and never looked back...
Dexter Fong: In the sack dude
cat: jackie robinson stole hom
Dexter Fong: That's why they call you lot
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: Marines have landed
cat: 49?
Captain Equinox: Marine eye drops...
Uncle Ernie: Not in my country club!
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: the answer to everything?
Ken: and the air farce took off
cat: those were days of old when we dug up the gold
Dexter Fong: ...on the Isle D'pari
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: or is that still 47?
Dexter Fong: P-47?
Dexter Fong: back to incontinent
Captain Equinox: no, standing up
Ken: i can only pee in the toilet (or in the stream when i'm not at home)
cat: its hard to look at tons of gold all over the palaces and chruches of europe without summoning the dylan version of that song
Dexter Fong: Cat: Gold crutches
cat: and bob's throw away line, "oh my goodness"
Captain Equinox: I'm just happy I still have a stream...
Dexter Fong: ?
Captain Equinox: funny as a rubber church...
Ken: !
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: a stream divided can not stand!
Dexter Fong: heh Timing it's a sometime thing
Ken: let's have a punctuation party
cat: midas-land
Uncle Ernie: They're selling post cards of the hanging; they're painting the pass ports brown ...
Dexter Fong: Ken lol
Captain Equinox: you can never step into the same stream too wise...
||||||||| doctec_eating rushes off, saying "9:58 PM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?"
Dexter Fong: I can't I'm in a comma
||||||||| Catherwood trudges in at 9:58 PM, dragging doctec by one foot and asks "Can anyone vouch for this bozo?"
cat: one of the many dylan refs on the electrician
doctec: back for a little while
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: here comes Doc
Dexter Fong: WB Doc
Captain Equinox: My uncle had a resection, now he has a semi-colon...
doctec: do not go genteel into that goad knight
Dexter Fong: CE: An 18 wheeler?
Captain Equinox: Literally true, and a joke I just won't make to him...
Ken: factual aside here: the appendix does have a purpose, at least in the young. part of the immune system
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: bag him
doctec: i ain't gonna work on fern's hill anymore
||||||||| It's 10:00 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Dave - dead from the yaws
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
doctec: er, NOmore
Dexter Fong: That Public health msg was nice
Ken: aw, dave, too bad
Captain Equinox: Public who?
Dexter Fong: K: A legitamate kill
Ken: i like my pubic health :)
mrmuckle: what Pubic Health msg?
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: well, the reaper has claimed his first victim
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 10 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
Captain Equinox: Thanks a lot Catherwood...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: still 16 minutes or thereabouts
doctec: what ye perl, ye shall also sew
Dexter Fong: Jeeze I'm early only 9:45 here
Ken: we're just in the wrong time zone
Merlyn LeRoy: "Forget it Jake, it's Indiana"
cat: i know what that's like
Dexter Fong: Merl: lol
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: was born in Indiana
Dexter Fong: "She's my daughter (slap) my squah (slap)
Ken: i was in indiana yesterday--cheap cigarette run
Uncle Ernie: Indian wants me lawd I can't go back there ...
Captain Equinox: That's redundant, especially if Mom's Diana...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: get the senator back on the bus
Ken: r.dean taylor--one hit wonder
Dexter Fong: CE? huh?
Uncle Ernie: Your moms Princess Godess?
Ken: damn, those dj memories just won't quit, will they?
Captain Equinox: Yes, until I was born, I was In Diana...
Dexter Fong: Dow Jones? Ken: still thinking about that 401K?
Uncle Ernie: Nice one Ken now who put the ram in the ramalama ding dong?
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: nope, and there's more to a DJ than just a voice
Captain Equinox: who put the bomp in the bomp a bomp bomp?
Ken: ernie: i never solved that case. maybe we could ask lt. bradshaw for some help?
cat: who was that man? i'd like to shake his hand
Dexter Fong: Who put the overalls in Mrs. Murphy's chowder for that matter
Captain Equinox: He made my baby fall in love with me...
doctec: shake rattle & roll
Uncle Ernie: I solved that ccase of Scotch last night it was the Edsels from 1960!
cat: maybe he has parkinson's too
Captain Equinox: or the benzedrine in mrs. Murphy's Ovaltine...
Dexter Fong: I wanna be sedated!!
Captain Equinox: Careful, you're sedating yourself...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: more Ovaltime then, it's time for a boost
Dexter Fong: CE: but only to nine? Mudhead
cat: has your country actually gotten worse since i left?
doctec: bonzo goes to bitburg
Ken: take two hits of this bomber i found in the sitting room and call me in the morning
doctec: spelling optional
Ken: cat: it gets worse every day
Dexter Fong: No Cat: Yours has gotten better
cat: 't leave you chatters alone for 2 monthes and you screw up your whole country
Captain Equinox: Cat, it got worse, BECAUSE you left...
doctec: dex: lol
Ken: now, now, don't give us all the credit. johnny ashcroft deserves some of it
cat: actaully vancouver just elected a leftwing government
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: correct, and now it is up to YOU to put it to RIGHTS cat!
Dexter Fong: Cat; Powerrrrrr!
Uncle Ernie: We're bringing the war back home where it ought to have been before ...!
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: what a liberal idea for a government, cat
doctec: the only wing left...
cat: of course the Province went from very slightly left to far right last year so the city cant do much on its budget
Ken: the revolution won't be televised.....
Captain Equinox: You ain't got no friends on the left...
doctec: take these broken wings & learn to fly...
Uncle Ernie: your right!
cat: i'se white
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: the bird circled a lot, withonly one left wing remaining
Captain Equinox: Sound off!
cat: and increasingly in the minority in vancouver
Ken: broken wings dipped in blue cheese are great
cat: and i consider that a good thing
doctec: cat, you're making vancouver look more & more inviting...
Captain Equinox: If they're on the increase, they won't remain in the minority, by definition.
Dexter Fong: Hey..my broken wing has a broken arrow in it
cat: of the countries i visited, however briefly, portugal seemed the most colour-blind
doctec: what with the right wing having captured the hearts and minds of america at the moment
Uncle Ernie: You know this reminds me very little of a time in the Estonian Mountains!
Ken: cap'n: when ari fleischer gets through spinning it, they will be extinct
doctec: armorica
Dexter Fong: 'e's stoned all the time
Uncle Ernie: Americorp™
Ken: dex: sounds like a good idea.....
doctec: is 'e' still with us or did she take off?
||||||||| It's 10:10 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Elayne - dead from the fiddlers
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Dexter Fong: Hmm Dunno Doc
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: has she been reaped, nope
doctec: well i guess that answers that...
Captain Equinox: 10 4 Elayne, or...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: yeah, there she goes
doctec: i didn't even get to throw her the coat
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: throw ME the coat, man!
cat: the dead coat soap?
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: I wanna die
Captain Equinox: Cat, did you shoot any more video in Europe?
Dexter Fong: Clank!!Sorry . Coat of arms
Ken: coat her in eggwash and dredge in corn meal, fry 10 min at 350
doctec: this coat has been dyed - does that count?
cat: a lot, yes
Captain Equinox: Cool.
Uncle Ernie: Yes dear theres a whole dead cat in every bar of dead cat soap!
Ken: thosands of battered women in this country and i always ate them plain
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: close enough, if it is contagious dye
Dexter Fong: That's why it's so soft
doctec: because i never lye...
Captain Equinox: dyeing is always contagious
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: and we all know that's the truth
doctec: especially tie-dyeing
Captain Equinox: ...but I often sodium hydroxide...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: po tas I him then
doctec: careful, too much sodium in the diet can cause problems...
doctec: ...like dyeing...
Captain Equinox: If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate...
||||||||| Bone-E-Boi waltzes in at 10:14 PM carrying an obsidian door knocker.
doctec: well howdt there bone man
cat: that boy sure is boney
doctec: howdy
Ken: hey boney
doctec thinks the grey goose is starting to kick in
doctec: hic
cat: is that a wine, doc?
doctec: vodka
Ken: doc: you wearing a cup? those goose kicks can be painful
Captain Equinox: hic haec hoc, hui hui hui...
doctec: ...not as good a vodka as teton glacier though (and i just found out it's available in CT again, ordered a couple bottles - woo hoo!!!!)
Uncle Ernie: Ah Canadian!
doctec: dr jawn introduced me to the wonders of teton glacier...
cat: i celebrated halloween with orange widow in paris, but never celebrated anything with a goose
Ken: i thought vodka was tasteless?
||||||||| Dave waltzes in at 10:16 PM carrying an obsidian door knocker.
Captain Equinox: me too
Ken: as you can tell, i'm not an afficianado
Ken: wb, dave
Captain Equinox: tasteless, I mean...
doctec: no, burlesque is tasteless
cat: lol
Ken: but easy on the eyes, doc :)
Dave: I'm gonna try to do math and chat at the same time
Dexter Fong: Doc: If it's done right
Captain Equinox: But not odorless...
doctec: vodka, when made well, has a wonderful absence of taste
Ken: dave: two goes into eight six times. remember that and you've got it made
Captain Equinox: absinthe of taste
doctec: teton glacier is so smooth you can drink it unchilled
cat: like japanese aesthetics
doctec: straight
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: only for SMALL vavles of 6 or 2
Uncle Ernie: Potatos are for eating not drinking!
Dexter Fong: ...and a wonderful presence of weltschmertz
cat: cocaine is for horse, not for men
Captain Equinox: Cat, are you an aesthetic supporter?
doctec: the sum of the squares is inversely proportional to the dividing of the heads
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: a head divided can not stand
cat: not in any wilde sense, cap
Ken: i like head :) just don't get it enough
Uncle Ernie: I head the athletic department ...!
cat: you ever see the flick how to get ahead in advertising?
Ken: i'm an atletic supporter
doctec: he's the athletic department head!
Captain Equinox: Yes!
Dexter Fong: UE: and I support you
cat: one of george harrison's better projects
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: you're the head of the athletic department
Captain Equinox: God bless George...
cat: my little toes looked like richard grants new head in that flick
cat: after 2 days in rome
Uncle Ernie: I am the athletic department head!
Captain Equinox: Trench toe?
doctec: now his guitar gently sleeps
Captain Equinox: I met Ringo in Stanley Park once...
Dexter Fong: Doc: It's for slae on Ebay
cat: 2nd page headline in limey paper i read on the plane from milan to heathrow, about his wife and kid getting the dough, not the krishnas
Merlyn LeRoy: dave, that wouldn't be too hard
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: roman toes, anything like roman fingers?
Dexter Fong: sale
doctec: dex: so i heard
cat: madrid, not milan
Merlyn LeRoy: oops, wait a sec dave, yes, it would be kinda hard
Dexter Fong: Is that godd Cat?
mrmuckle: HEY! I met Stanley in Ringo Park!
Dexter Fong: good
Dexter Fong: sheesh
Ken: cat: did all the spaniards talk with a lisp when pronouncing certain words?
Dexter Fong: Ken: A lithp
Captain Equinox: I drove all night from Seattle, and Ringo was booked as Richard Starkey
Ken: i met livingston in africa
doctec: thpaniards?
cat: i remember being attacked by hare krisha types in airports in the 70s insisting i had to give them some money because george harrison was one of them
Captain Equinox: yeth
cat: i thought he had plenty of his own money
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: roll those Spainiards
Captain Equinox: Thpaniels?
doctec: roll those krishnas!
cat: ken, yeah that /th/sound is weird to get used to
mrmuckle: were there lots of flies in Spain???
Ken: i've rolled a lot of mexican in my time
Captain Equinox: Cathtilian...
Dexter Fong: My Krishna's are in those barrels
cat: and the portugese make all s sounds into /sh/ sounds
Captain Equinox: One per pair of trousers.
Uncle Ernie: I'm rolling some road apple red right now!
cat: like a whole penninsula of gay people telling you to shut up
Bone-E-Boi: Some weird FST.com usage statistics this November. http://www.firesigntheatre.com/stats/usage_200211.html
Ken: ernie: when available, i prefer a pipe now for my "diversions"
Captain Equinox: Cat lol
Dexter Fong: Pennis? ula? Cat?
Captain Equinox: What's weird about the stats? The united stats?
Uncle Ernie: Me too, hate the taste of burning rice!
Ken: etais unis
cat: and condy would hate the taste of burning you, ern
doctec: bone - what is weird about them?
Bone-E-Boi: For example, in the Top 50 Referrers...Number 11 is http://www.brothels-hookers.com/
Bone-E-Boi:
||||||||| Catherwood leads klokwkdog inside, makes a note of the time (10:24 PM), then fades off into the distance going on about the waiting room or the sitting room or something.
Captain Equinox: WEEEEERRRDDDDD SSTTTAAAATTTTSSS
Merlyn LeRoy: oh, them
Bone-E-Boi: That one left me speechless.
Ken: that IS weird! unless they use fst as background noise for their moaning
klokwkdog: evenin'
doctec: the november first bump is from people coming to the site after the halloween firesign segment on all things considered
Uncle Ernie: Nothing wrong with Aunt Rice that a drawing and quartering wouldn't cure!
Ken: hi klok
Dexter Fong: Hey Klock
Captain Equinox: Why? Don't you like broth?
Uncle Ernie: Hi Klok ltns!
Dave: ok, I'm done with that assignment, now, I also am totally lost as I have not refreshed the page, sorry
Merlyn LeRoy: that happened a couple of times, weird porn sites (that don't seem to actually exist) hitting up
doctec: hey klok
Bone-E-Boi: Number 12 is http://www.female-escorts-bitch.com/
Bone-E-Boi:
doctec: ok, i'm gonna try this new chat feature - lili's serving up dinner now
Bone-E-Boi: el broth, broth el... what's the dif.
klokwkdog: what nu chat featur?
doctec: i'll stay connected for the time being
doctec: zenjoy...
Dexter Fong: Klock: "I'm Away"
cat: who's that clock on the wall?
Ken: we will all clap with one hand
klokwkdog: kuhl!
doctec: (see, my name is in parenthses at the top of the page)
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: 16 is http://www.free-adult-personals-whores.com/
doctec: oh wait, now it's not
Bone-E-Boi: http://www.brothel-genital-massage.com/ is the Number 13 referrer to FST.com this November.
Bone-E-Boi:
klokwkdog: he has been parentheticalized!
doctec: here goes - again
Dexter Fong: Back at the punctuation festival
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: yes, it is now, captive
Ken: klok: verbing your nouns again, i see. please take the meds on time!
klokwkdog: i just said no to drugs
Dave: hey, I actually went to see the brothel in pompe, let's just say that there were pictures of different positions carved above the doors, how do I know? the tour guide said that there were, but no one would describe the positions to me, so I missed out on the fun
Uncle Ernie: Kid you're a wizard whoever you are!
klokwkdog: even so, i hardly ever hear the voices anymore
Ken: the wizard of id (or was that super-ego?)
cat: i took some pix of them, but that wont do you any good
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: I always do what the voice tell me, do you?
Ken: dave: just ask your girlfriend to help you act them out and use your fingers
Uncle Ernie: No the Wazard of Is!
Dexter Fong: Klock: This is The Ultimate Bulletin Board: Take your meds. That is all
Bone-E-Boi: Firezine is number 15 on the Top Referrers list. Three porn sites above it in November.
klokwkdog: no -- these voices are in French and they call me Jean...
cat: problem with roman paintings is they're all too small
Captain Equinox: Well, they won't do you any harm, either...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: de florette?
Dexter Fong: Cat: That's because people were smaller then
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: that just springs to mind, so to say
Bone-E-Boi: Did I miss the explanation? Doc? Merlyn?
Dave: and thus is the biggest disadvantage of being blind, I can't see the babes, oh well, suduction is a wonderful thing if it is done skillfully
Ken: dwarfs?
cat: yeah but the french were tiny too and their pictures were huge
klokwkdog: something like that; they want me to drive a bunch of English people somewhere and what I want to know is...why can't they hire a car?
Ken: too loose, la trek
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: they always wanted a larger...
Dexter Fong: Bone: No you missed all the exposition and evberything
Bone-E-Boi: Don't shoot the Zen comedian.
Captain Equinox: Fish
cat: i heard that the size of french men remained the same for a century after the slaugthers of napoleon, only to be replaced byt he slaughters of ww1
klokwkdog: go
Merlyn LeRoy: it's happened once before, BEB; a bunch of hits all in one day from fake porn sites. dunno why
Dexter Fong: Cat: It's all ego with them
cat: whom?
Bone-E-Boi: The Balcony, directed by Louise Wong.
klokwkdog: so, you are postulating a law of conservation of male Frenchmen?
Ken: whom, whom, on the range
cat: she's got a spear you can shake
mrmuckle: I thot it was all Egads with them
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: must be someone spoofing via a proxy?
Bone-E-Boi: BRB....
Dexter Fong: Cat: The Frogs
Captain Equinox: I eat only raw food, I am de-ranged.
klokwkdog: welcome back, BTW, Cat -- we missed you and DT sometimes didn't post all the best gossip
Uncle Ernie: ohm ohm range
cat: just overheard chat, klok. there's a lot of it over there too
cat: my letters? while i attempted to stay in touch
Ken: cat: do the you're-a-peein's use their cell phones in inappropriate places like over here?
klokwkdog: it was a VACATION -- just yanking ur chain
cat: actually france was the highlight of the trip
Captain Equinox: How long are you in N Van, Cat? Months?
Bone-E-Boi: R U sure they're take? My browser tells me they're "inaccessible." Ain't that the trufe.
klokwkdog: we expect a full report in 30 daze, however ;-)
cat: Fumiyo hated it when we were in Paris in 1980 but it;'s a totally different city now.
Bone-E-Boi: Fake, not take. Uh, hi, JustAMinuteFlatFoot.
Ken: i was in paris in 1916, bad time then
klokwkdog: they did clean it, finally?
cat: the Like foreigners. more french speak english and are happier to do so than french canadians
Captain Equinox: I'll bet the main landmark is still an Eiffel...
cat: how long am i in north van?
Ken: unless you're blind like dave
Dexter Fong: Ken: Did you know Hemmingway
Uncle Ernie: It must be that time again ... Mr. Birdseed Go To Press! Later Y'all Keep'em flying! http://issuesandalibis.org
Captain Equinox: Yes, or do you go back to Europe...
cat: i justgot off the plane from madrid. still in euro time
klokwkdog: yes, but it's been deconstructed by Frank Geary, Cap't
Ken: how much does a hemingway?
Captain Equinox: Hola, senor...
cat: no we live here, just visiting over there
Dexter Fong: Night UE
Bone-E-Boi: Inaccessible isn't necessarily fake. Maybe they're trying to keep the riffraff out.
||||||||| Catherwood says "10:34 PM, time for SOMEONE to leave!", grabs Uncle Ernie by the collar and gives 'em the old bum's rush out the door
Captain Equinox: ...thorry, thenor...
klokwkdog: if you knew Hemingway like I knew Hemingway....no, it lacks that ineffable 'something'...
cat: henmingway? i'll tell you a fucking hemingway story
Ken: klok: just use a 1/2 cup of infinity and a splash of imaginary numbers
Bone-E-Boi: You can hit Reload as many times as you want, but you're never going to get in.
klokwkdog: most of them were, weren't they, at the base of it?
Dexter Fong: Tell it brother Cat
Captain Equinox: I know that, Cat. You were at my wedding, almost a year ago...
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: which hemming?
cat: i look and look , mostly at my umbrella, and finally find harry's bar as it's right behind me as i'm trying to read a map
klokwkdog: at the end of Heminway is a big pile of traprock
cat: and then there it is, a tiny thing
cat: alas, with no tiny in it
Captain Equinox: What's it like inside?
Ken: that's what i say, cat, when i take off my underwear
Dexter Fong: Klock: Give me Prufrock that's traprock
cat: so i go in, and there are a dozen or so people drinking white wine. i order a glass too.
klokwkdog: I miss Tiny Dr. Tim!
Captain Equinox: so say we all
klokwkdog: Gee, Cat, you're so conformist
cat: bartender says, '"we dont serve wine. hemingway had cocktails here. here is our menu"
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: hear, hear
Ken: klok: he's smiling because his connection is very high speed now :)
cat: so i look at the menu and one thing on it is spumante, the italian sparkling wine.
cat: der a glass
klokwkdog: thanks, Ken!
Ken: lol, cat!
cat: iit's 6 euros. but it isnt wine
Captain Equinox: nasty spumanti?
Bone-E-Boi: This is Walter Winchell, dunking donuts with the police dogs in killer whate territory.
cat: hemingway would have probably slugged me
Ken: spumante is good
Dexter Fong: I hate those killer whaters
Captain Equinox: That would be because he likes you.
cat: spumante is an Excellent wine. i consumed many glasses in the month we were there.
Bone-E-Boi: Whale, not whate. I've got caffiene jitters..
Ken: better than champagne, imho
cat: also "sprarkling wine:" of various labels in france, spain (cava, i know that) and portugal
Dexter Fong: More coffins Bone?
mrmuckle: he likes you to hate those killer whates
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: I like a good asi
Ken: boney: have anudder cuppa the good stuff
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: err, asti
klokwkdog: kwd is itching for his beer, but must desist a while longer...all this spreching of alky...
Bone-E-Boi: Expresso is better than champagne? Dear lord, you are a geek.
Dexter Fong: Hey Mr. Muckle
Ken: no, i meant the asti not the java
Bone-E-Boi: Espresso. I think the next one will be decaf.
klokwkdog: the solstice is not even close and we have 5" of snow outside
Captain Equinox: snow good
Ken: klok: about what we have here. at least the temp has moderated. 25 now. 2 nights ago, -1
klokwkdog: what happened to the topic??!
Dexter Fong: Klock: Whats the correlation between the solstice and inches of snowfall
Captain Equinox: topical anasthetic
Ken: today's topic: I spent most of my money on whiskey and women, and I just wasted the rest.
Merlyn LeRoy: what topic do you want?
klokwkdog: we were not so cold, but then, we didn't raise our bridge tolls, did we?? ;-)
Ken: topic of capricorn?
Dave: hey, gotta go, see yall, I'll make my usual random appearances, read some of the previous days' logs and you'll find me popping up saying some weird shit, sorry I can't stay on longer, got lots of shit to do, bye yall
Ken: later, dave
klokwkdog: nite Dave-o
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: bye dave
Captain Equinox: bye Dave
Dexter Fong: Snow good topical anashtetic...freeze wound Kemo Sabe?
Merlyn LeRoy: see you, dave
Captain Equinox: There's no such thing as a freeze lunch
JustAMinuteFlatFoot: me gotta runs too, see yall later
klokwkdog: it cannot heal the wounds I have, Dex...
cat: am i hear yet?
||||||||| Dave departs at 10:42 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
Dexter Fong: Night Flats
Captain Equinox: Here here
cat: by dave
||||||||| JustAMinuteFlatFoot runs out the back door as Mayor P'nisnose blasts through the front door holding a shotgun and shouting "Where's JustAMinuteFlatFoot?! It's 10:42 PM and my ballot boxes haven't been stuffed yet!"
Ken: bye, mike
klokwkdog: that depends on whether you have a 3-bone ear system or a 1-bone
Dexter Fong: Klock: Get over it
cat: sell graves
Captain Equinox: by God
klokwkdog has been watching the LOTR DVD again...
Dexter Fong is glad to heat that
Dexter Fong err hear
Ken: now cool it, dex
cat: i look forward to the 2 towers
cat: john and "o power
klokwkdog: supposed to be dark, Cat
Dexter Fong: Ken: Thanks my thermostat was on the Fritz
Captain Equinox: Middle Act of Middle Earth...
cat: so's life, klok
cat: Fritz the cat?
Ken: what's it doing on fritz? i bet you take his temp rectally, too
Dexter Fong: Meow?
Captain Equinox: Fritz is the German word for the sound velcro makes
Dexter Fong: Ken: No. Hans does that
klokwkdog: there is a new "director's cut" with 5 DVDs in it; I estimate that in 2004, there will be a "final edition" with something like 25 DVD discs in it ;-)
cat: 2 towers has my favourite image in all of literature. i quote it on the bitsite, where Bit is riding a pony
||||||||| Catherwood trudges in at 10:45 PM, dragging 3 guys named Cheech by one foot and asks "Can anyone vouch for this bozo?"
3 guys named Cheech: ouch!
Ken: hey cheech
Bone-E-Boi: Maybe speed typing on the tiny built-in keyboard of a Zaurus was a mistake.
Dexter Fong: Chong!!! Theu're here
klokwkdog: vouch? what is this vouch crap?
cat: cheech, it's the cops
Merlyn LeRoy: 25 dvd's would be the editor's cut
Dexter Fong: Klock: You get in free with a voucvher
Ken: boney: my friend drives a zaurus. ford did good on that one
cat: why would i want to know more about the flick than i saw on the screen?
3 guys named Cheech: yallo
Dexter Fong: I'm waiting for the Foley Editors cut
Captain Equinox: Cat, what do you mean?
cat: how's it goin, cheech?
Ken: mallo yallo?
3 guys named Cheech: hokay. a bit slow 2day
Ken: dex: sounds good to me
Bone-E-Boi: Ken and I need remedial typing lessons.
klokwkdog: yes, B-e-B: I have given up on the lumbering QWERTY things and the chiclet crap and have finally adapted a toy piano for keyboard duty. everything i type has a delightful ring to it
Dexter Fong: Ken is channeling Donovan again
Bone-E-Boi: It's never to late to "bone up" on your typing.
cat: that donovan song "rules and regulations": has been playing in my head a lot lately. where is napster when you need it?
||||||||| 3 guys named Cheech rushes off, saying "10:48 PM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?"
Ken: did we say something bad to cheech?
klokwkdog: try Pink Floyd, Cat - acceptable substiture and more readily available
Dexter Fong: Klock ...and one piono to bind them all
Bone-E-Boi: If I could just get into one of those porn sites, I could bone up on my typing at a chat room there.
klokwkdog: LOL Ash
Ken: bone: if you can type "deeper" and "oh god!" you'll do fine
Dexter Fong: BEB lol
Captain Equinox: Your shenanigans could cost me this erection...
klokwkdog: they are so crowded because they are what the people want - most successful net biz
Ken: of course, that presupposes you will be imitating a 13 year old virgin
Dexter Fong: Ken: Could be those free diving Fransiscans
Bone-E-Boi: Have you ever tried to chat at a porn site and here at the same time?
klokwkdog: then there's eBay, but that is a kind of porn, too
||||||||| Catherwood ushers Bunnyboy into the room, accepts a grimy quarter as a gratuity, mumbles something about 10:50 PM, then departs.
Bunnyboy: lo dere
cat: in 48, a japanese building had a sign encouraging macarthur's run for the presidency in that year, "we pray for your erection"
klokwkdog: hey BB
Ken: the rabbit!
Bone-E-Boi: It could lead to some embarrassing mistakes.
Dexter Fong: Bunny
cat: hey bunny
Bunnyboy: yeah, the rabbit
Captain Equinox: Those inscrutable Japanese...
Bunnyboy polishes his brass knuckles
klokwkdog: how is imitating a bid for eminem's ancestral house III any different than imitating a 13-year-old virgin donkey?
Captain Equinox: Sometimes, I think they're doing it on purpose!
Bone-E-Boi: If Phil were here, he might mistake you for a groupie or something.
Ken: as long as they aren't unscrotumed
cat: its' the confusion of "nipples:" with "nipponese" i suspect
Bunnyboy: lo cat. Welcome back!
Ken: klok: please tell me
cat: front too. all quiet on the western, etc
Captain Equinox: Or Nipples, Italy...
klokwkdog: ah, those Javanese devils!
cat: any remarque in a storm
Dexter Fong: i'm away
Bone-E-Boi: Damn, why do we start calling ourselves a nation of nipples? It sounds so down home enlightened.
Ken: toad away?
cat: no, the tao is away. you're just gone
Bunnyboy: Nipples of Venus, featured in AMADEUS.
klokwkdog: they all bought SUVs and helped blow up a nightclub in Bali!
Bone-E-Boi: Why don't we? Not why do we. Damn Zaurus.
Bunnyboy: BTW, the Director's Cut of AMADEUS got an R, through the inclusion of one brief nude scene.
Captain Equinox: Can you look up definitions on it? Is it a The-Zaurus?
cat: anything interesting happened in seattlle since i've been gone, bunny?
klokwkdog: next, we'll be innundated with take-out ricetafel houses
Ken: ask roget about that one
cat: no more murders, gehry buildings?
Bunnyboy: cat: Nope. Same Olde Swamp.
Bone-E-Boi: You can watch Dick Cheney being interviewed in front of a police SUV if you hurry. It's on Fox, of course.
Captain Equinox: I'm in Seattle, it's clogged. I used to work for a plumber, I know clogs.
Ken: i got hair in my shower drain. what's the fix?
klokwkdog: nitric acid ken - works every time
Ken: don't lye to me either
Captain Equinox: Clog dancing.
Bunnyboy: Anybody land a copy of J-MEN yet? Merlyn?
klokwkdog: he's not ethnic, Cap't - not allowed
Merlyn LeRoy: clog arteries
Ken: klok: i can buy HCl easily at concrete place, but not HNO3
Merlyn LeRoy: oh yeah, I got J-men BB
cat: i was reading this 1968 michener book called iberia, about how madrid went from a carless town in 1950 to a nonstop traffic jam in the 60s
klokwkdog: ken, that's just not playing by the rules. You have to MAKE YOUR OWN!
Captain Equinox: BB: do you live in Seattle?
Bunnyboy: THE PRODUCERS finally came out on DVD this week. Joy!
klokwkdog: ...starting with air
Bunnyboy: Capt: Why, yes!
Bunnyboy: West Seattle
cat: we our bus from porto was cruising through a sunset in the great madrid plane that looked like the saskatchewan we were in back in september
Dexter Fong: I'm back...and it says so
Captain Equinox: All right! By the Admiral movie theatre?
Ken: i think i'll leave that to the pros, klok. if i'm going to make something dangerous, it will be crystal meth or something with a real payback
Bunnyboy: Merlyn: How was the transfer? Did they have a good print?
klokwkdog: there is a lot of desert in Spain, featureless except for decaying Sergio Leone western sets...
cat: and as soon as the light got too dark to read, a sign appeared saying madrid 59 km. then a second later, another sign, welcome to madrid
Merlyn LeRoy: it was pretty good, I thought
cat: and then we were in a traffic jam that seemed to last for hours
cat: s was only a few days ago
Ken: traffic jellies are better than jams
Bunnyboy: Used to live in the Admiral District. Now 'round about the Fauntleroy Junction.
Captain Equinox: Maybe the sign read "Madrid 85 CM"
Bone-E-Boi: War of the SUVs. http://www.ibistek.com/security_vehicle.html Every drug dealer in L.A. will want one.
klokwkdog: gosh, Cat, you could have done that right here in the states, lots cheaper
cat: michener's been for less time than it takes to get around madrid
cat: been dead
klokwkdog: yeah, wonder what "Antelope Freeway" is in Spanish?
Captain Equinox: Cool. I haven't been there in years. How is it now?
Ken: el roado de los faux-toros
cat: the synchronicty of that, and the comparison with regina a few weeks earlier was downright eeerie
klokwkdog: I guess just go look at the signs in LA now; they've all been changed
Dexter Fong: El Freeway Antelopo 3/5 mile
Bunnyboy: (sings) I rather be dead in Madrid, than my dreamer believe that I did...
klokwkdog: metric, Dex, metric! Think MKS!
cat: if you wanna go to a spanish city, try barcelona
Captain Equinox: la autopista del antílope
klokwkdog: or Central Falls, RI
Ken: i have a barcelona lounger that reclines
Dexter Fong: Klock: For the gringos
klokwkdog: Yeah, do it for the Gringos!
Ken: tampa actually has some great spanish restaurants
Captain Equinox: When I was in Spain, working on Mel Brooks's "Solar Babies," the hamberguesas were made with real ham...
cat: but spain has more
Dexter Fong: CE: Holy Chorizo
Ken: cat: i'm sure you're correct there :)
klokwkdog: well, they had enough actors, finally, right Cap't?
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 11 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
Ken: holy cyd charrise!
Captain Equinox: Si, amigo.
Dexter Fong: Holy Red Foxx
klokwkdog: we have got to fix that gong of Catherwood's!
Captain Equinox: Or fix Catherwood.
Ken: he's using the wrong gong mallet
Dexter Fong: Catherwood's ben kicking the "gong" around
klokwkdog: it has now precessed a full quarter-hour
Bunnyboy: Redd Foxx is Saturday's E! Hollywood True Story.
cat: long gong?
Ken: i think 26k years will do the complete cycle
klokwkdog: i thought Catherwood was already fixed...
Bone-E-Boi: http://www.icrc-hq.com/st.htm Sure it has a four mounted 50 caliber machine guns, but is the SUV armor plated?
Captain Equinox: He's gong crazy
Dexter Fong: I'll have this pants precessed for your in 30 minutes....next Thursday
klokwkdog: they have to put on something - there must always be a show, and Brooke Burke is pretty much wore out
Ken: bone: try driving one of those through cleveland
Bunnyboy: klok: Yeah, "fixed". But he keeps "going through the motions". *elbow* *wink*
cat: dex, that happened to us in europe more often than i would have expected
klokwkdog: as do we all, BB; as do we all...
Dexter Fong: Cat: They sent your pants ahead?
klokwkdog: LOL, Dex
Captain Equinox: Were you panting in anticipation?
Bunnyboy: With his head in his pants, cat greased the English Channel...
cat: on plane from madrid, i bought a newsweek and find the end article by michael moore. unbelievable. is he now so publishible?
klokwkdog: groan
Ken: with bated breath at the sushi bar
Dexter Fong: I was till I was cuffed
Captain Equinox: and baited breath, too.
klokwkdog: methinks the captain speaks with hooked tongue
cat: italy and france have coin laundries. spain has, well, who knows? so we had to use the hotel service, and the hotel couldnt even use the hotel services
Ken: i need to go to the chinese/japanese buffet tomorrow. haven't had sushi in some time
Dexter Fong: Her breadths was duee to the bait she wore around her waist...anchovy's
Bunnyboy: I gotta eat and sleep. Good reception, everybwah!
Bone-E-Boi: Michael Moore has a website, which is proof that he's unpublishable.
Ken: nite, bun
cat: by again bun
Dexter Fong: Night Bunny
Captain Equinox: hookah toung! Good night Bunny Boy!
Bunnyboy: Sorry. Channelling Strom Thurmond there, for a spell.
Bone-E-Boi: Wait... Not a web site. A web presence.
Ken: happy birthday, strom!
klokwkdog: i've read that french and spanish coins are very neat indeed, Cat; it's great for distressing blue jeans (see lead NYT Magazine articul this week), but hard on the other clothes
Bunnyboy: The StromGong is a Cent-ree-joe-nay-ree-un taday.
klokwkdog: nite BB
Bone-E-Boi: He's on his way to becoming a web personality.
Dexter Fong: Strom!!! STROM!!!! Can you here me?
Captain Equinox: David Ossman's birthday is tomorrow.
Dexter Fong: or hear
cat: i se in paper that moore's new flick is playing in multiple vancouver theatres
klokwkdog: I thought he had been Senator longer than he has
Dexter Fong: 66 he'll b CE
Ken: i bet he has problems buying life insurance now. the actuarial tables don't go that high
cat: maybe thats why hes in newsweek. he's become mainstream
Ken: klok: since 1948
klokwkdog: maybe he will now SELL life insurance
Bone-E-Boi: (I haven't seen this many errors since that outfielder for the Dodgers dropped acid during the World Series back in 1966)
cat: or the bushies are so confident they can use him to let off steam
||||||||| Bunnyboy rushes off, saying "11:07 PM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?"
Dexter Fong: Klock: "whoooh! That's longer than any one's been senator beflor
klokwkdog: no, 1954, I heard today. I thought '48
Ken: maybe '48 was when he entered the house.
Captain Equinox: It hasn't been de-thurmond.
cat: mark, marc, marconi- there's a radio for you
Dexter Fong: The Strom is in the House
klokwkdog: he was Governor or something
Bone-E-Boi: "I dropped the easy pop fly because the love aura was in my eyes."
Ken: visine cures that
klokwkdog: oh, I remember - he ran for The President in '48 on state's rights party; carried 4 states. They didn't say which, but I imagine SC, GA, AL, MS
Dexter Fong: ..."Mickey Mantle, 1952
Ken: dixiecrat
Dexter Fong: Who you calling a Dixiecup?
klokwkdog must prep food briefly
Captain Equinox: Can't you hold your water?
Ken: i can't hold mine, ggp, brb
Dexter Fong: CE: It's that lack of waxy buildup
Bone-E-Boi: HIs lawyers won't let me divulge his name. Mickey Mantle didn't play for the Dodgers. And he was a beer drinker.
Dexter Fong: Bone: You're outta my league here =)
Captain Equinox: Waxy Buildup and the Stains...
Bone-E-Boi: Sorry, real life calls. I'm off to flush this damn Zaurus down the old Commodore.
Captain Equinox: BEB: lol
Ken: g'nite, boney
cat: by bone
Merlyn LeRoy: bye beb
Dexter Fong: CE: I loved that group...remeber their first hit...You've got that touch and glow"?
Dexter Fong: Night Bone-E
Captain Equinox: As soon as I touch her, she glows...
Ken: and as soon as she touches me, i grow
Bone-E-Boi: Here's a hint: With his sunglasses on, he did look a lot like Jimi Hendrix.
Dexter Fong: You must be the Old gas Lighter CE
Captain Equinox: That's me...
cat: it's a floor wax. no, it's a desert topping
Captain Equinox: You're both right...
Dexter Fong: Bone-E: still floundering here
Merlyn LeRoy: it's a desert wax for that oasis look
Bone-E-Boi: Right fielder. Number Sixty-nine. Jimi Hendrix.
Captain Equinox: Cat, how did Fumiyo like Europe?
Ken: dex: stuff it with crab meat
||||||||| Bone-E-Boi departs at 11:14 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
cat: now pitching for the yankees, Fidel Casfro
Dexter Fong: ;sighs it must be that extra quart of vodke I drank
cat: Fumiyo loathed Europe. but it got better as we went along
Captain Equinox: Wow! Loathed?
cat: wanted to come home as soon as we got off the plane in rome
Captain Equinox: Just because it's dirty and uncivilized?
cat: greatest day of the trip was returning here last saturday night. second day, landing in switzerland, fleeing milan in october
Captain Equinox: That must've been one fun trip...
Ken: letterman is repeat with tom petty. leno has billy crystal and alanis m'sette
Captain Equinox: Atlantis Marmoset?
Dexter Fong: Ken: What's on Public access 35? in NYC?
cat: smell, for one. she couldnt deal with the food, she hated the art, etc. the for a profoundly social person, the encounters with other people were Weird with a Beard
Ken: dex: sorry, only have my zip code in the cookie
Ken: aoltvlistings.netscape.com
Dexter Fong: Ken: Quick! make a Xeroxz copy and swallow both
Captain Equinox: Wow, that's hard. When you're with somebody halfway 'round the world, and they're not having a good time, that would be very difficult.
Ken: microdot :)
cat: this is not an untruth
Dexter Fong: Leaves a microfilm after you use it
Ken: are microfiches the same as sardines?
Captain Equinox: But you got through it, you endevored to persevere, you're back.
Dexter Fong: Can that stuff
cat: but things got better when we met our friends in france, and spain was where she reallyl wanted to go, so inspite of torrentail downpour when we were in the alhambra, enjoyment magnifed as we travelled
Ken: hold the anchovies
cat: bosch's fish were small enough. imagine him trying to draw a micro fish?
Dexter Fong: Where would you like me to hold tham, Sir?
Dexter Fong: them
Ken: hey klok: tech time question. why do people insist on wanting my netbios name from udp ports?
Captain Equinox: Behind the gills.
Dexter Fong: 40 Years behind the Gills...A neighbor's story
Ken: i DO read the firewall logs here :)
Captain Equinox: doctech you there?
Ken: dobie gills?
Ken: and his sidekick, maynard g. krabs
Dexter Fong: CE: Doc is officially away..if you scroll up you'll see on the roster his namde in paardenthesis
Captain Equinox: The good doc was kind enough to tell me of this forum. I'm glad I came, but just the same, I must be going...
Dexter Fong: Yikes...me hand 'as gone all numblike
Ken: cap'n: come back any time. we are generally friendly
Captain Equinox: Thank you. You are all great. Cat, say Hi from Sam to Fumiyo.
Dexter Fong: But Cap'n it's not midnite yet
Captain Equinox: I still turn into a driveway at midnight
Dexter Fong: Night CE
Ken: oh joy! our state is getting a "no telemarker" list!
Captain Equinox: Goood Niiiiigggghhhhttt...
||||||||| Captain Equinox runs out the back door as Mayor P'nisnose blasts through the front door holding a shotgun and shouting "Where's Captain Equinox?! It's 11:24 PM and my ballot boxes haven't been stuffed yet!"
cat: i too depart. buy all. sell none
Dexter Fong: Night Cat =)
Ken: later, cat
klokwkdog: nite cat, CE
klokwkdog: so, you will have to leave MI, then, Ken?
Dexter Fong: So...just us snowbounds left eh?
klokwkdog: and the parenthetical trio...
Ken: klok: i generally see "unavailable" on the caller id and don't pick it up anyway
Dexter Fong: Ken: Contemplating a relocation?
klokwkdog: wonder if they know the Nairobi Trio?
klokwkdog: new law, Ash, new law
Dexter Fong: I hear they're big in Madagascar
Ken: be glad you aren't in n.c., klok. 1.5M sans amperes
klokwkdog: i know - my brother called by cell
Ken: is he in jail?
klokwkdog: he was getting Diesel for the tractor, which has a 25KW generator stuck on its PTO right now. Best guess is Sat+
Dexter Fong: Should I have to read the log?
klokwkdog: yeah, search for "telemarketers"
Ken: or, dex, you can just throw in the fire and watch the sparklies go up the chimney
klokwkdog: (it's not hard -- they usually find YOU)
Dexter Fong: Arghhh Another uncomprhended moment...or huh?
||||||||| Catherwood trudges in at 11:30 PM, dragging Captain Equinox by one foot and asks "Can anyone vouch for this bozo?"
klokwkdog: he says it drops 30 volts when the heat pump kicks on
Dexter Fong: CE: WB
Ken: resistance is futile.....
Dexter Fong: Reluctance is understandable
Ken: do not impede those electrons
Dexter Fong: ...Nay! but let them go positively to their state of rest
Ken: amen
Dexter Fong: a plan
klokwkdog: Tarik Asisz was pretty huffy, wasn't he? "Every Iraqi has a gun in the house. We give them all guns."
Dexter Fong: I thought Tarik left in a Huff
Ken: sounds like alabama to me
Ken: tarik is a chaldean christian, but mingles well with muslims
Dexter Fong: Falling Stars?
klokwkdog: that's his people, but he's no more religious than Saddam...
Ken: i put one in my pocket, but the thermonuclear fusion burned my leg
Ken: baath party motto: and a thug shall lead them
Dexter Fong: You can lead a thug to the baths but you can't make him confess
klokwkdog: but he's a really GOOD thug, Ken!
Ken: every reporter i've heard discussing interviews with saddam says he's very charismatic
Dexter Fong: Unless you read him the Rites of Ste. Miranda
klokwkdog: so was Hitler. so was Uncle Joe.
Ken: must be a job requirement for dictators
Dexter Fong: Ken: So apparently was Hitler ...though I always found him to be a little over the top
Ken: i'll never make it then
klokwkdog: c.f. Kate Bush: "Dancing With Hitler"
Dexter Fong: Ken: What color shirt should I 3ear
Dexter Fong: Elite Nazi
Ken: dex: plaid is my favorite color, you can't go wrong with a nice flannel
Ken: roone arledge died today
klokwkdog: it is a brown shirt dinner, sponsored by the GOP. RSVP
Dexter Fong: Ken: What Clan then...the Biermeisters...the Crystal Knights?
Ken: krystalnacht to you, mein herr!
klokwkdog: something to do with sports, I'll venture
Dexter Fong: I forgot. I'm training to gbe an English Actor so I can play a Nazi
Dexter Fong: Klock Rune was a Mystical sport
klokwkdog: yeah, you can get a bit in that picture Ahnold wants to make, about the "Good Nazi"
||||||||| It's 11:40 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Captain Equinox - dead from jaundice
||||||||| cat - dead from measles
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Ken: dex: make sure bob crane isn't around with a camera
klokwkdog: he was the guy cursed to spend the rest of his life with a camera around his neck?
Dexter Fong: Ken: I think he's no where around at all any more
Dexter Fong: The Ancient Photographer
Ken: ah yes, r.i.p., voyeur
Dexter Fong: He snappeth one of three
klokwkdog: do you ever get the feeling that we have crossed some disgusting threshold?
Ken: dex: just thought, if you ever are reincarnated as a snake, you could be dexter fang
Dexter Fong: Prints ...2pm next Thursday
Ken: get robin williams on the case, 1 hr photo
Dexter Fong: Ken: Im also Jim Fang....see?
klokwkdog: ...like the E! channel will run out of anything else and will start showing videotapes of abdominal surgery of stars or something?
Ken: letterman occasionally has star x-rays as part of a quiz
Dexter Fong: Klock: You not crossing the threshold...its moving backward
Dexter Fong: afk for a wb
Ken: well, i don't have the yaws, but the yawns have got me now. see you all next time :) ttfn
klokwkdog: ...or that there will be 57 channels of spy cam shows detailing celebrities' every minute?
klokwkdog: nite Ken; Dex, I'm about gone myself - a big pile to shovel tomorrow
||||||||| Ken departs at 11:44 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
klokwkdog: that must be some dinner Lili cooked up! ;-)
klokwkdog: don't remember/know the tale on the rest of the parenthetical trio (Merlyn & mrMuckle)
Dexter Fong: Back Klok
Dexter Fong: Good to have you back Klock =)
klokwkdog: i have go, if there's nothing pressing on the table
Dexter Fong: Nope Night K
Dexter Fong: I'm outta here too
klokwkdog: oh, i was just away resurrecting computers and hanging drywall; may be gone again Solstice
klokwkdog: nite
klokwkdog: farewell, parenthetical trio! may you return in concert and have a pleasant chat among yerselfs!
klokwkdog: finis
||||||||| It's 12:00 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Dexter Fong - dead from the common cold
||||||||| klokwkdog - dead from measles
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Catherwood walks in wearing his pyjamas, yawns, and mumbles "It's midnight here in New York city"...then he falls over and starts snoring loudly..
mrmuckle: oops! G'nite .....
||||||||| "12:01 AM? I'm late!" exclaims mrmuckle, who then runs out through the French doors and down through the garden.
Merlyn LeRoy: whoops, goodnight for me too...
||||||||| Merlyn LeRoy rushes off, saying "12:04 AM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?"
||||||||| It's 12:20 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| (doctec) - dead from measles
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Catherwood steals into the room, and intones "Announcing 'Phil Austin', also known as 'Nancy' -- the time is 1:30 AM" -- then he slowly retires back into the vestibule...
Phil Austin: Hi, Logreaders and sleepers. I'm too late, I know, but wanted to say hi. Bye.
||||||||| Phil Austin runs out the back door as Mayor P'nisnose blasts through the front door holding a shotgun and shouting "Where's Phil Austin?! It's 1:30 AM and my ballot boxes haven't been stuffed yet!"
||||||||| Catherwood enters, and announces to all and sundry "It's 4:32 AM, time to change the log file and clean out unused rooms; please log off for a minute or two. Thank you for your patience."


The Evening's Participants:
3 guys named Cheech
Phil Austin
Bone-E-Boi
Bunnyboy
Captain Equinox
cat
cease imril
Dave
Dexter Fong
doctec
doctec_eating
doctec_snowbound
Elayne
JustAMinuteFlatFoot
Ken
klokwkdog
Merlyn LeRoy
mrmuckle
the elevator boy
Uncle Ernie
URL References:
http://issuesandalibis.org
http://www.brothel-genital-massage.com/
http://www.brothels-hookers.com/
http://www.female-escorts-bitch.com/
http://www.firesigntheatre.com/stats/usage_200211.html
http://www.free-adult-personals-whores.com/
http://www.ibistek.com/security_vehicle.html
http://www.icrc-hq.com/st.htm



Rogue's Gallery:

cat_pp.jpg (5168 bytes)
PP and Cat(cease)

newbunny.jpg (4426 bytes)
Bunnyboy

capeklok.jpg (5469 bytes)
klokwkdog

capeken.jpg (7639 bytes)
kend^

freq.jpg (4441 bytes)
FreqMan

brian1.jpg (2847 bytes)
Merlyn LeRoy

capedoc.jpg (6006 bytes)
DocTech

newlili.jpg (6085 bytes)
LiliLamont

roto.jpg (6046 bytes)
Rotonoto

babs_so.jpg (5555 bytes)
LeatherG & SO

nino1.jpg (5352 bytes)
Nin0

tonk1.jpg (6123 bytes)
Tonk

And,
"The Home Team"

peggy.jpg (5240 bytes)
Peggy Blisswhips

audrey.jpg (4873 bytes)
Audrey Farber

tdt.jpg (6077 bytes)
Tiny Dr. Tim
Rest In Peace,
Dear Friend