A Firesign Chat


Special appearance by
Phil Austin

||||||||| Catherwood re-enters the Waiting Room and explains "This is the main discussion room which is logged each night."
||||||||| Catherwood announces, "The time is 4:33 AM - I now declare Thursday's chat log for March 06, 2003 officially open!"... and then, he retires back to the vestibule...
||||||||| Catherwood steals into the room, and intones "Announcing 'llanwydd', also known as 'Nancy' -- the time is 8:59 PM" -- then he slowly retires back into the vestibule...
||||||||| Catherwood strides in with a trumpet, plays a fanfare, and proclaims "Nine PM on Thursday, March 06, 2003 - I now declare alt.comedy.firesgn-thtre's chat officially open!"
llanwydd: testing
||||||||| Catherwood strides up and snorts derisively "Presenting 'Dexter Fong', just granted probation at 9:06 PM", then leaves hurriedly.
Dexter Fong: Is this a test...I'm not prepared
llanwydd: This is a tusk of the Emergency Breadcrust System. The broadchasers in your area have expended this system to...
||||||||| Merlyn sneaks in around 9:07 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last week's "unpleasant incident."
Dexter Fong: Hey Merl
Dexter Fong: and Llad
Merlyn: hello
llanwydd: ...if this had been an actual emergency,
llanwydd: evenin' folks
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood pipes up: "9:08 PM and late as usual, it's Elayne, just back from Billville."
Elayne: Evenin' all!
Dexter Fong: Hi Elayne
llanwydd: what's the topic tonight? The Firesign Theatre?
||||||||| Ken sneaks in around 9:09 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last week's "unpleasant incident."
Dexter Fong: in Peace and War
Dexter Fong: Hey Ken
Ken: hello, dear fiends
Elayne: I think the topic should be the PiRAmids.
Ken: er, friends
Elayne: I just saw a special about the Sphinx that invited us all Forward Into The Past.
llanwydd: the peer amids
Elayne: Ahhh, a little Egypt-shine... a little Egypt-sheen... I remember Achmed...
Ken: i just watched "the smirk" tell about how god is on our side
Elayne: Served my every kneed...
Dexter Fong: If I made a pass at you E: would you think I was forward?
Elayne: Ddid a grand job on my ankh-ules too.
Elayne: On chat, Dex? Go for it. :) But I get to tell Robin. He's sitting about five feet away.
Ken: dex: forward pass or lateral?
llanwydd: ankh ules! now \I get it
Elayne: Oh, the smirk! Yes, I'm looking for a website for y'all...
Dexter Fong: K: Was considering Bi-lateral
Ken: full frontal assault
Ken: everyone thinks i'm backward
Elayne: The site has to do with how you can tell that the Smirk knows he's lying.
||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and Dave disembarks at 9:12 PM.
Dexter Fong: Nothing between us and Bagdad except 100 miles of camel snot
Ken: hi dave
Dexter Fong: Hiya Dave
Elayne: Hey Dave!
Merlyn waves
Dexter Fong: E: Easy...he's talking
Elayne: How are you feeling this evening, Dave?
Elayne: Surely 's not camels!
Ken: isn't "hiya" a ralph spoilsport quote?
Elayne: Okay, first website: http://www.smirkingchimp.com/
Dave enters, tired from the nap he took, but full of chili, hmmmm, that'll go over well morrow at school, eh? hey yall
Dexter Fong: K: Not exactly
llanwydd: brb or bbiam or
Dave: Elayne, a little down, but not as bad as usual
||||||||| 9:14 PM: Cease jumps out of the hall closet saying "I've been listening to all of you talking about me for the past hour!"
Ken: dave, be glad you aren't old enough to HAVE to listen to dubya
Ken: hey cat, meow
Dexter Fong: It's a Cat
Cease: last chat before the war?
Elayne: Glad to hear it, Dave. Hang in there.
Elayne: Hey Cat!
Ken: cat: last word i read was march 17th was THE day
Dave: I listen to him, what kind of a statement is that Ken, I'm compitent
Ken: revenge of st. patrick
Dave: hello there Cat
Cease: forever known thereafter as st.dubya's day
Cease: hey dave
Ken: dave, i'm not saying you aren't competent, just that you aren't of age to be forced to make political decisions as to voting, etc. i know at your age i was very political, but couldn't do much about it
Elayne: I hope not, Cat.
Dave: yeahnow I see what you mean Ken
Ken: you're probably more competent than many adults. it's a sad reflection on our society, but true
Ken: anyone smart enough to like the 4 or 5 boys, is ok in my book!
Cease: oklahoma has books?
Ken: and corn higher than an elephant's eye
Cease: solid republicans, eh
Ken: but i think dave is in colorado. same country, different state
||||||||| It's 9:20 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| llanwydd - dead from the common cold
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Ken: cat: recent evidence says the only thing solid republican is the new voting machines and their programmers
Elayne: Ah, here's the site. Read this now: http://www.southknoxbubba.net/skblog/archive_2003_02.php#982
Cease: is that like Be Here Now? that was a good read
||||||||| Catherwood enters with Fong, Dexter close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 9:21 PM tree-stunting plans, and runs off to the Aviary.
Cease: oh i read that already through Cursor
Ken: ah, elayne, i like the "bites lip" story
Dave: no time, gotta read this, there's only one screen reader to feed me info
Elayne: It's interesting, Ken, I tried to find it via a Michelangelo's David without the prick Google search but couldn't...
Ken: we now enter the land of "names, backward"
Elayne: ...but I did find lots of references to Republicans accusing Clinton of having done that!
Fong, Dexter: ISP probs Ken
||||||||| Merlyn aka 'The Reaper' has killed off Dexter Fong at 9:23 PM
Elayne: I don't remember Clinton ever biting his lower lip when he lied, but this South Knox Bubba guy seems to have made something of a study of Bush doing it.
Fong, Dexter: Thanks Merl
Ken: someone de-maled david?
Dave: hey, watch it there Ken
Elayne: Grid, I love blogs. I hear stuff like three days before The Daily Show makes fun of it. :)
Ken: uh, dave, not you, the michaelangelo version!
Merlyn: ok
Dave: yeah I know, just givin' ya shit, don't smoke it though
Ken: e mentioned something about it earlier
Elayne: Yes Ken, if you go to Google that's part of their new logo, and it appears the statue of David has been neutered.
Elayne: The David is where the "l" in Google goes.
Fong, Dexter: E: That's how the original looks
Ken: hmmm, i haven't googled in days. no withdrawal symptoms either
Elayne: Hey Dex, I've seen that statue, it's endowed!
Elayne: Hubba. :)
Fong, Dexter: You sure E?
Ken: as i recall, it looks distinctly non-jewish though
Cease: not nationally
Elayne: Ohh yeah, Dex, there've been lots of folks through the years wanting to throw a towel over it...
Dave: ever noticed that the Buddha doesn't have a prick, sorry just realized that, but it's a He, right?
Elayne: I mean, it's not turgid, but it is there.
Ken: dave, maybe it's just that huge belly covers it up?
Ken: turgid. a nice word :)
Elayne: Well, in fairness, most of the Buddha representations I've seen are of him sitting, and his belly kind of overshadows his privates.
Cease: maybe that's what enlightenment means
Elayne: Yikes, should've read Ken's answer before i typed. :)
Elayne: "Turgid" is a lovely word, Ken. :) :) :)
Ken: don't worry, elayne, just proves that great minds think alike
Elayne: If there's no sex with enlightenment I don't want to be in your revolution.
Cease: buck turgidson in control of the pentagon i see
Cease: sounds lilke emma goldman
Ken: precious bodily fluids.........
Elayne: Cat, I don't think any of those pricks have been turgid in ages.
Elayne: At least Dole admitted he needed medical help.
Fong, Dexter: Enlighened sex = Doing it with the lights on
Elayne: Thanks for recognizing the ref I was riffing, Cat.
Cease: the general in dr. strangelove
Ken: dole sex= doing it with a pineapple on
Elayne: I've decided to call the lot of them "bombastards" from now on. Or has Firesign already come up with that?
Ken: the original hawaiian tickler
Cease: pining away for the fjords
Dave: ah, the pineapple, the true prick
Elayne: It's kind of a triple pun, they like that sort of thing.
Fong, Dexter sings Tiny Bubbles
Ken: i love pineapple, my favorite fruit.
Ken: who you callin' a don HO?
Elayne: Harvey Fierstein is my favorite fruit.
Elayne: Dang, my "un-PC" tags got erased from that one. Sorry.
Dave: I don't like pinapples that much
Elayne loves imitating Haaah-vey, but it's hell on the throat.
Ken: i'm a total tropical fruit person. after pineapples would be mangos, papayas, guavas, passion fruit
Fong, Dexter: Yucca
Elayne: I'm into berries, more. Give me raspberries every day for the rest of my life and I'll be happy.
Ken: sorry, dex, not a fruit it's a root
Fong, Dexter: Okay Elayne, you asked for it: ppppphhhhhhhhhhttttttttt!
Ken: brooklyn cheer?
Fong, Dexter: Bronx raspberry
Elayne: *sigh* Yes, I did sort of ask for it, at that...
Cease: razzleberry dressing?
Fong, Dexter: Give 'em the old razzleberry beret
||||||||| "9:34 PM? 9:34 PM!!" says Catherwood, "klokwkdog should be here by now...oh, THERE you are!" as klokwkdog enters and sits on the couch.
klokwkdog: hello
Fong, Dexter: Oh, THERE you are
Ken: hi brian
Cease: klok
Elayne: Hi Klok! How's the snow situation up there?
Dave: 'ello there klok
klokwkdog: white
Ken: merlyn is fading into the sunset as we speak. i like that effect
klokwkdog: deep
Fong, Dexter: cold?
Fong, Dexter: wet?
Elayne: It's a bit of a slushy mess here in NYC.
klokwkdog: i turned on the heat
Ken: we had about 6" tues. night, but sun out today, a lot of it melted
klokwkdog: we have 9-10"
Ken: forecast here says low 40s by weekend
Ken: i just noticed that "fong dexter" almost sounds like an occupation
Elayne: All in all, I'd rather be in Philadelphia... oh wait, I will be.
Elayne: I was a Fong Dexter for Freedom once.
Fong, Dexter: What's in Philly, E?
klokwkdog: liberty bell
Ken: cheese steak sandwiches?
Cease: hey el, i noticed a copy of one of the sandman books on reserve shelf at north van library.
klokwkdog: Wanamaker's
Elayne: My friend Leah, Dex. I was going to remind her to come on the chat tonight. She's been on the IRC one once or twice...
klokwkdog: Neshamminy Mall
Fong, Dexter: Klok: I'd love too
Cease: checked it in the computr and found they have the whole set (i think) in the teen section downstairs
Elayne: Glad to see the libraries getting more copies, Cat. You're reading Neil's journal, yes?
Cease: i can become a Teen again!
Cease: online? no. he mentioned it in some tv interview i saw but never checked it out
Dave: I'd rather grow the hell up and get away from teens
Ken: the chordettes: "mr. sandman.........."
Elayne: Hang on Cat, I'll get you the URL.
Ken: that sure shows my age, huh?
Fong, Dexter: or your taste in music K
Elayne: http://www.neilgaiman.com/journal/journal.asp
Ken: dex: my taste is all in my mouth
Elayne: Oh, and for those who are wondering about my latest obsession: http://www.popcap.com
Elayne: I downloaded Bookworm for Windows a few days ago, and am now #5 (last I checked) on the all-time score list. :)
Cease: really interesting, el
klokwkdog: 911 – The Questions Begin: ‘Where Was Bruce Willis?’ Demand Angry US Citizens
Elayne: Heh, probably not, Cat. (Unless you mean Neil's journal.)
Cease: i lost my hard drive yesterday. i thought these dells were supposed to be good. so when new one is installed tomorrow, i'll start collecting websites, et al
Cease: i just read the first few entries about his activities is what i found interesting, el
Fong, Dexter: How'd that happen Cat?
Cease: i was filling it up with firestuff on tuesday night,and on wed morning, it told me it was corrupted and could not open
Elayne: Neil's trials and tribulations with his electronics could fill a non-fiction book in and of themselves, Cat. :)
Fong, Dexter: That's kinda strange ...unless you picked up a virus?
Cease: i called dell and they walked me thru the recovery thing on the start up disc, and the check disc programme or whatever. the guy said it worke din 99% of the time. not this time
Ken: sorry to hear that. it's terrible to lose your drive like that.
Cease: so it had to be reformatted, which is what i'm coming to you from today
Fong, Dexter: Hope you were well backed up
Cease: but they're brining new one tomorro. doc suggests i get 2, one for back up. sounds reasonable
Elayne: Doesn't it feel special, though, to be in that magical 1-percentile?
Dave: backups are bad, especially when they spill shit all over
Cease: yeah, me and the ring
Fong, Dexter: What one is that E?
Ken: e: it depends on which side of the normal curve that tail is on
Ken: i backed up over a garbage bag i forgot in my driveway behind the van. what a mess
Fong, Dexter: Can't afford a garbage masher ken?
klokwkdog: got $70 ($140 CDN) sale drive at ckt city this week, supposed to be 80G, inside was 100 G and congratulatory note. the box says 80G, so it's a lottery, tho'
Elayne: Well, we're in a sort of magical percentile at the moment. We suddenly have all these premium cable channels by mistake.
Dave: I have a garbage masher in my kitchen, you should hear the noise it makes when something made of glass is put in
Cease: i should get one of those, klok, but who would install it?
Elayne: So Robin's just reminded me I have to leave in 15 minutes to watch "Penn & Teller: Bullshit" on Showtime (before the cable system takes it away from us).
Ken: dex: i had more garbage than would fit in the can, was going to take it to a dumpster and the back door was frozen shut and i couldn't open it. i just forgot it was there and backed over it after loading some in the side doors
Dave: POP!
klokwkdog: try structural steel - much louder noise than glass
Ken: cat: they are extremely easy to install. if you can operated a phillips screwdriver, you're in
klokwkdog: the cable giveth and the cable taketh away
Fong, Dexter: Ken: Put the car in low, and spin the wheels...it'l throw it all in the street...or maybe your neighbors yard
Ken: hardest part is getting those little jumpers in the master/slave positions
Cease: so instead of asking the dell delivery dude tomorrow for a new drive, i should just get one from elsewhere cheap?
Ken: cat: if it's covered by warranty, by all means get it. but another to backup to is a great idea
Fong, Dexter: Cat: I would think the replacement is under warantee
klokwkdog: cat - don't multiply your probs unless comfortabgle with taking control
Fong, Dexter: Klok: Agrre
klokwkdog: dell won't support the foreign drive, although I'm sure they'll try to be helpful
Ken: klok: they don't even need to know it's there
klokwkdog: it's not rocket science to install, yes
Cease: yes it is, dex
Cease: that;'s why i went for the 3 year warranty, one of the big seling points of the dell
Dave: I've never installed anything on my comp, hardware that is, I'm afraid I'd hit the motherboard and fry it all to shit
Ken: cat, i would almost guarantee that you can look at the pictures on the big foldout sheet they will give you with a new drive and do it without reading anything
Fong, Dexter: Cat: As klok says, unless you're comfortable installing hardware etc, let Dell do it. That to will be under warantee
klokwkdog: an important note Dave - it helps to turn the power OFF when installing ;-)
Cease: they're coming to install it tomorrow, dex. thing is, do i want to ask dell for another drive (a D drive) or get one from elsewhere?
Dave: yeah, thanks klok, I know, I have a sighted friend who does it all for me
Ken: cat: they will replace the c: drive, take old one with them more than likely
Fong, Dexter: Cat: Can't answer that for you..I *did* replace my CDRom drive when that went bad myself, and it worke fine but.....
Cease: that's what i'm expecing them to do, ken
Ken: then you can install a d: if you so desire
Cease: i need more drive space for the video i'm about to plunge into anyway
klokwkdog: being sighted is not much help, now that they have made these little bugger cases so small and dark. you stick your hand in there and it comes back a bloody stump, i absolutely hate the mechanical aspect
Fong, Dexter: There you go Cat; a testimonial
Cease: i watched a friend install new drive on my old computer. didntn look impossible to do
Ken: i installed new cd-rw drive recently, took about 6 tries to get the cable seated properly and i can see it all
klokwkdog: everything is stamped and not deburred; in fact, i swear they hire people to file the edges sharper
Ken: but it can be done
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 10 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
klokwkdog: part of the backup bit is keeping the backup separate from the working set
Fong, Dexter: BTW Cat; Gorgonzola? I guessing that he's not Paul Gorman aka Gorgonzola the Cheese Monster?
klokwkdog: so having 2 drives covers many failures, but the best approach is to have #2 sitting there but unplugged & unpowered.
Ken: the best would be to have separate raid system backing up everything continuously, but that's rather expensive compared to just a second drive
klokwkdog: this requires a lot of box-opening or else some rework to install a removable tray (about $25cdn and fairly easy). and mastering drive->drive copies
klokwkdog: raid is nice, but assumes that the critical event is not, say, a power surge that fries all the drives
Ken: raid is good, but black flag works better
Cease: i'm being overwhelmed by tech talk again.
Cease: d it's about MY problem!
Elayne: Well, time for "Bullshit." See you next week!
klokwkdog: and having two drives in a raid (Redundant Array of Inexpensive Disks) setup makes both of them indecipherable except to a raid controller
Ken: cat, when you tire of it, just change the subject
Fong, Dexter: See you Elayne
Ken: later, e
Cease: by el
klokwkdog: nite e
Merlyn: night elayne
klokwkdog: ken, we can't change the subject anymore
klokwkdog: the powers that be have taken that ability from us
Ken: ah yes, the literal interpretation of that sentence :)
Cease: no this is really a bummer. and with zone alarm and norton anti enemy or whatever, and the tech doc's recomened Dell
Cease: less than 9 months. what an abortion
klokwkdog: little by little, our freedoms are being restricted
Cease: also the most i'be spend for anything i own outside of the 11 year old car, and that still runs fine
klokwkdog: dell is good.
Fong, Dexter: Speaking of being restricted..must go and see if Alternate-side parking is supendered
Ken: dex: they do that during snow?
klokwkdog: evening prayers, eh?
Cease: well if both you and doc say so, it must be. but why did mine suddenly die?
Cease: i can understand viruses, etc or me opening up the back and destroying it unintentionally
Cease: ut corrupted files? i thought they all lived in ottawa or victoria
klokwkdog: it still works, is just corrupt. this can happen. it may not be the drive's fault
klokwkdog: or it could be
Ken: cat: if i really believed god meddled in day to day affairs of men, i'd blame him
Ken: of course, cosmic rays can cause that too
||||||||| It's 10:10 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Elayne - dead from the yaws
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
klokwkdog: maybe a loose wire, there are myriad possibliities; computers are still in a primitive state and you are a pioneer
Ken: wait until the NEXT century of computing!
Cease: still pioneering for the fjords
Ken: they will look back on us as witch doctors waving animal bones
klokwkdog: most of the early car owners were (and had to be) mechanics, not ordinary people
Cease: one of my uncles was an early car dealer, gas station owner is eastern sask
klokwkdog: computers have advanced much in 60 years, much faster than autos.
Cease: neal amid enriched by his rich tales of those days
Merlyn: penn & teller are doing john edward now
Ken: "if we can put a man on the moon, why do our hard drives still fail?"
klokwkdog: they show that on TV?
Ken: brian: which one is dead?
Merlyn: hard disks and shuttles can crash
Cease: channeling him? look at this grape
klokwkdog: yeah, slice it a little, put it in a microwave and watch it emit flames
klokwkdog: so can economies. everyone like ours so far? ;-)
||||||||| Catherwood leads nurse judy inside, makes a note of the time (10:14 PM), then fades off into the distance going on about the waiting room or the sitting room or something.
Cease: hi nurse
Dave: hey nj
Ken: hey jude
Cease: low doc
nurse judy: hi ho chaterinos
Dave: 'ey doc
nurse judy: has Austin made his non-appearance yet?
Merlyn: no, or yes, he hasn't appeared
klokwkdog: is he scheduled not to apear again? oh, phooey
Dave: has PP ever shown his face here?
klokwkdog: they keep putting it off, it's like the war or something
nurse judy: anybody get an advance CD of All Things?
Dave: yeah but the war's eminent, they might not show, the war will
Dave: it'll be short-lived though, unlike them, ok don't wanta discuss politics now
Merlyn: no, dave, PP is the last holdout
Merlyn: Ossman showed up once, and bergman showed up, but couldn't type anything for some reason
Dave: at least he's not a fallout
klokwkdog: we sent offerings and everything; can't understand the problem
nurse judy: just his hair falls out?
nurse judy: he's not our type?
klokwkdog: fear of type casting?
klokwkdog: but he's one of us
klokwkdog: or we're one of him
klokwkdog: i think
klokwkdog: maybe
nurse judy: gubba gabba we accept him one of us
Dave: possibly
klokwkdog: i read in an online tabloid that he wears a prosthetic bald pate, NJ. Said he hated being hiristute
||||||||| Dave, spotting Bradshaw, runs into The Auditorium.
||||||||| Merlyn, spotting Bradshaw, runs into The Auditorium.
nurse judy: hiristutic jew?
||||||||| Dave has arrived at the appointed hour of 10:22 PM.
klokwkdog: yes, it's genetic disorder of some kind, something to do with the spanish inquisition
Dave: ok well the "i'm away" thing didn't work, I'll just brb
||||||||| Merlyn has arrived at the appointed hour of 10:23 PM.
Cease: pp the only firemember not to appear here. odd as he was first on line
Merlyn: you left the room too, dave, don't know why..
nurse judy: dave's not was here?
Ken: i left the room, but went to basement for laundry purposes
klokwkdog: it gets old after awhile; the patina wears off and the spirit is not as willing
Cease: he left his knot? then we are fit to be tied
Cease: or burmesed
Ken: cat, now that's myanmared
Cease: and loving every minute of the world's attention turned to iraq
Cease: good article in local paper today about that
Dave: does anyone know aything about guitar TAB? I just have a question on notation
klokwkdog: know of 'em, not how they work, am guitar-challenged
Ken: sorry dave, not my thing at all
Merlyn: some guy in the firesign newsgroup had some url for a big guitar tab site
Merlyn: ted alvy, a sort of semi-regular: http://www.donnybravos.com/
klokwkdog: you're lucky, cat, there are articles about that in the local paper all the time now. more and more holes in the fast food service as the reservists ship out...
Ken: i know which end goes up on a guitar, and i think i could tune one, but that's about it
Cease: he played the Egyptian DJ in Neal Amid, and a real dj in real life
Cease: was on the air on kPPC along with the firesign in the Hour Hour days
klokwkdog: before it became redundant
Dave: thanks Brian, brb
Merlyn: dave, there's a tutorial on tab notation here: http://www.donnybravos.com/ndlessonarchive.php?go=download&path=.%2FPlaying+Guitar&file=Tab+Notation
Ken: i was dj in real life once, most fun i ever had and got paid for it. unfortunately didn't get paid enough to stay in it
Merlyn: but it uses ASCII pictures for some things.
Cease: yeah, i never saw any money in radio, even when what i wanted to do was what people wanted to listen to
||||||||| Catherwood escorts Bunnyboy in through the front door at 10:31 PM, picks up his cues (only slightly scorched), and heads for the billiard room.
Bunnyboy: lo dere
klokwkdog: can't do that any more. Clear Channel controls all radio play in the US now.
Cease: and speaking of great soundmen of the past And present...
nurse judy: don't bump him
Ken: one of my friends in radio told me you have money without security, or security without money, but never both at the same time. he also told me you knew how successful a dj was by the size of his personal u-haul trailer
Merlyn: hey bb
Ken: hey bunny
Bunnyboy: But I think the most important thing is the Resident's FAITH!
Bunnyboy: I just about gritted my teeth through my jaw.
Cease: ursula k leguin, one of the best living authors, advised everyone to get a paying job or marry some one with one, and Then write. not before
Ken: praise grid and pass the gas, er, ammunition!
Ken: yeah, cat, how many writers are commercially successful--1%?
nurse judy: commercial writers
Fong, Dexter: I am reparked...like they're gonna sweep the street tomorrow
Bunnyboy: How many writers' agents are successful?
klokwkdog: they do pretty well, NJ
Ken: are eskimos reparkaed?
klokwkdog: also TV sitcom writers, but only those under 30, accd'ng to last weekend's NYT Magazine
Bunnyboy: whoops! I pulled the trap!
Fong, Dexter: Hi Bun and Nurse J
Bunnyboy: lo Dex
klokwkdog: 1 minute and kwd must pause
nurse judy: lo boys
Ken: klok: referencing the age of 30, when i turned that age, my dad took me aside and said to me that my grandfather believed a boy didn't become a man until 30. then a dramatic pause, and he said that just before he died, he thought he would change that to 40
Fong, Dexter: Ken: Who died, your father or GF
Ken: dad still alive at 71, grandfathers both dead
Cease: they have a habit of doing that
Fong, Dexter: Cat: Isn't a habit something that has to happen more than once?
Cease: yeah, grandfathers die all the time. grandmas too
Ken: dex: most of the world believes that you live and die more than once
Cease: that means i got 8 more.
Cease: ess this is my 9th
Fong, Dexter: Ken: Most of the world believes a lotta things...I don't care to join them however
Ken: some of their beliefs make a lot more sense than ours do. but let's not degenerate into metaphysics :)
Fong, Dexter: K: Yes...let's just stick to physics
Cease: ellen degeneres is into metaphysics?
Fong, Dexter: Newton's law says you gotta die
Ken: i would prefer to talk about brown little naked native boys cavorting in the hash factory :)
Cease: shirley maclean, didnt you used to be my grandma?
Fong, Dexter: You live near a Dinty Moore factory, Ken?
Ken: newton was actually about 90% occultist and 10% physicist. but the world remembers only the apple
nurse judy: sweet charity
Cease: yes, death is the natural trajectory of all we define as "life"
Fong, Dexter: Ken: Well....he was a *brilliant* mathamatician for one thing
Ken: dex: actually, i'm a couple of blocks from a baby food factory. abbott labs does similac or something like that near here
Cease: but how accurate are our definitions?
Ken: cat, it depends on how you define "define"
Cease: Charity has a suite?
Cease: bill clinton, i didnt recognize you without the cigar
Fong, Dexter: featured in this months Penthouse
nurse judy: the cigar drips
Ken: did you hear that clinton is going to be on 60 minutes with bob dole as a regular "point/counterpoint" commentator?
Fong, Dexter: Interesting combo
Cease: Penned untellered Ow's
nurse judy: who gets the viagra
Ken: erectile dysfunction meets erectile function
Cease: sad
Ken: 10 week contract, $1M
Merlyn: that's an erectile set
Ken: all for 90 seconds talking per week. where the hell do i get a job like that?
||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and Deputy Dan disembarks at 10:48 PM.
Ken: hi depdan
Fong, Dexter: Deputy Dan will knock us down when we make the street
nurse judy: deputy dan has no freinds
Deputy Dan: ...I think he just walks with a limp...a limp what, I don't know.
Cease: it's sad that politcal debate in your country has degenerated to soundbytes for bucks, from the top down
Cease: hi deputy
Deputy Dan: Or friends, either...
Cease: i thought bob marley killed you
Merlyn: bowling for soundbytes
Cease: or did he Really shoot the sherrif
Deputy Dan: Hey, Cat...
Ken: that was the sherrif, not the deputy
Merlyn: no, bob marley was killed by the ghost of christmas past
Deputy Dan: That's Omar Sheriff.
Ken: sheriff. can't spell tonight
Cease: has no name, er, friends
||||||||| It's 10:50 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Bunnyboy - dead from the yaws
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Deputy Dan: So, I'll sit a spell...
Ken: is omar still alive?
Cease: i stop being able to spell by about 6pm
Merlyn: O my sheriff
Fong, Dexter: K; Maybe someone put a spell checker on you
Ken: but can you spell a sit?
Deputy Dan: Cheese, louise...
Merlyn: a checker spell?
Ken: dex: don't be silly, only witches use spell checkers
Merlyn: how about a chess spell?
Deputy Dan: This is my dog, Spell Checker...
Fong, Dexter: Turns a Crown Vic into a Checker
Cease: a good republican cloth coat too
Deputy Dan: You've got it down, Pat...
nurse judy: full police package?
Ken: i am NOT a crook
Deputy Dan: Yes, Nursey.
Merlyn: I am not a cook
Fong, Dexter: Goddamit! Henry...Pray with me!
Merlyn: or a number
nurse judy: a clown victorian
Cease: Henry! Henry Allpoor
Deputy Dan: On yer knees, Henry. Oh, I wonder who's Kissinger, now.
Ken: speaking of numbers, how about six?
Fong, Dexter: Charles Dickens Bozo
nurse judy: and john mitchell will have a big enchalada
Deputy Dan: And taco the night away.
Deputy Dan: Unless his reception is chili.
Fong, Dexter: John? .....martha?,,,,,
Cease: first half of cbc bio of joni mitchell on the other night. i'd forgotten how wonderful her songs were when they first appeared.
Cease: remember joni mitchell than john mitchell, whoever he was
Merlyn: "looking out for #6" was a best-seller
nurse judy: bluer than blue
Ken: cat: she is still one of my favorite female singers/songwriters
Fong, Dexter: Has something hap[pened in the interim Cat?
Deputy Dan: Very, nice, Mr. F. Sneak Freberg in here, will you?
Fong, Dexter: How's your Mom, dan?
Deputy Dan: Nicely, Nicely, Fong.
Cease: i havent listened to any of her music in many years. it keeps coming out, i just haventn listend to it
Ken: one of my favorites of hers was twisted, with the cheech and chong cameo appearance in it
Cease: i first saw her at USC in 1968. may have been one of her first concerts in LA
Deputy Dan: She is nice, Cease.
nurse judy: mingus monked
Deputy Dan: fungus amongus?
Fong, Dexter: Charles the Onliest
Cease: chip monk doing lighting, before he was famous, i think. she floated on stage as a cloud. we knew he would go far
Ken: between her, judy collins, and carly simon, i don't know which one i like the best. simon was the most commercial and cutest, but not a great writer
Deputy Dan: Joni? Or Chip?
nurse judy: monk fish
Cease: saw her the following here at greek theatre, with csny. she had forgotten the lyrics to several of her songs, but most in the audience knew them
Cease: all seemed rather fucked up, and acoustics terrible for that kind of music
nurse judy: miles of isles
Deputy Dan: Yes, I've heard that about her recent performances.
Cease: when i lived in japan, she used to come over and flog her paintings thru canuck embassy
Ken: i have friend with almost 100 bootlegs of csny concerts dating back to late 60s, he told me to send him a case of blanks and $ for shipping, he would copy all of them for me
Fong, Dexter: K: There san be too much of a good thing =)
Fong, Dexter: can
Ken: yeah, dex, i think maybe 5 of them would be enough
Deputy Dan: Can can
nurse judy: I thought they were horrible in concert
Cease: i've only seen them twcie, that greek theattre thing at the dawn of their career and in vancouver maybe 5 years later. on both occasions they were out of tune, poorly rehearsed, bately coherent, very loud and very far away from the exquisitery of their early albums
Ken: i saw them minus young about 6 years ago, decent, but well below their prime
Deputy Dan: Takes practice to stay in shape.
Cease: if you're gonna stick it out
Fong, Dexter: Start with Neil Young
nurse judy: same with Firesign, out of practice out if sync
Deputy Dan: And you don't want to walk with a limp...
Cease: true, nurse.
Ken: neil was always my least favorite of that group. i tolerate his presence with the rest of them, but won't listen to him sing alone
Fong, Dexter: I dont wanna walk with a gimp either
Cease: which is why they are so good now. been working together for, what, 5 years regularly? and the satelite show made them rekindle long lost fires
Deputy Dan: Even if she's beautiful?
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 11 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
nurse judy: Jimmy the Gimp
Cease: then walk with a forest
Ken: i acknowledge that he's a great writing talent but beyond that, he sits in the shadows of other performers
Deputy Dan: Forest Gimp?
nurse judy: now that XM is over what do we expect?
Deputy Dan: At least he's still Young.
Fong, Dexter: Life is like an ecosystem...somebody's always fucking it up
nurse judy: and knot kneeling?
Cease: forever
Deputy Dan: Fong, goo!
Fong, Dexter: Bah! =)
Ken: dex: i have a friend who says humans are to the earth as fleas are to a dog
Deputy Dan: Mille scusi
nurse judy: we call him needle young
Fong, Dexter: Something to scratch at K?
Cease: ah, italian
Deputy Dan: Si, prego!
nurse judy: spreading plague
Ken: he keeps saying that the earth will shake one day and all humans will fly off into space leaving a better planet
Deputy Dan: Does he have a rough schedule?
Cease: i'd rather spread prague
nurse judy: but the chinese won't fall off?
Deputy Dan: Let me Czech.
Ken: are we speaking eyetalian now? cacciatore e ricotto to you
nurse judy: i'd rather spread joni michell
Ken: ah, the word "czech" reminds me of the tiny doctor. r.i.p.
||||||||| Catherwood enters with Senor Yamamoto close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 11:04 PM tree-stunting plans, and runs off to the Aviary.
Deputy Dan: Yoni, er Joni?
Fong, Dexter: OI!
nurse judy: or peanut butter
Dave: mmmm, tomatos and really, really good ice cream
Senor Yamamoto: oi
Ken: buenas noches, señor
Deputy Dan: Oiga!
nurse judy: yamma yamma
Senor Yamamoto: allo
Deputy Dan: Ha
Fong, Dexter: You're here rather late SY
Senor Yamamoto: yeah, workin
Fong, Dexter: Not that it's not a pleasure to see you =)
nurse judy: out bar b quing igauna again?
Ken: even if we can't see you really......
Senor Yamamoto: Like them Iguana tails
Fong, Dexter: Oh I can see him Ken....in the reflections in the windows and the rear view mirrors
nurse judy: there's one crawling up my leg
Fong, Dexter: NJ: Relaz and enjoy it
Senor Yamamoto: Indeed
Cease: sy
nurse judy: mmmmmmm...
Cease: si
Senor Yamamoto: That means he likes you
Ken: judy, i like you too--can i crawl up your other leg?
Fong, Dexter: Ken: Heard from Roto recently?
nurse judy: what's your sister's name
Senor Yamamoto: Cindy lou, how bout you?
Ken: dex: yes, but no mention of the chat. i think he goes to a class on thursday nights now, but can't confirm that
nurse judy: yeah bubba be my ken doll
Senor Yamamoto: Roto needs some class, I say
nurse judy: cease: you're supposed to say Sue
Fong, Dexter: K: Ah, he's not talking eh? Maybe another trip to Radio Prism
Senor Yamamoto: A boy named Sue?
Fong, Dexter: Si
nurse judy: si
Ken: he and i swap political and/or religious emails and websites all the time
Cease: you;'re right. my mel brooks imitations have been fading away
Senor Yamamoto: is
Fong, Dexter: *sigh*
nurse judy: she sews
Deputy Dan: see
Fong, Dexter: Sue?
nurse judy: your drew a mel blank?
Deputy Dan: soo...
Senor Yamamoto: She sells sea shells by the sea shore
Senor Yamamoto: NJ: good one!
Deputy Dan: doo dah doo dah
Fong, Dexter: See Saw Marorie jackdaw
Senor Yamamoto: Who's deputy Dan?
Cease: not one of his friends
Deputy Dan: An evil force from behind the refrigerator
Fong, Dexter: Dapety Dan es su amigo
||||||||| Catherwood strides up and snorts derisively "Presenting 'Freq Man', just granted probation at 11:11 PM", then leaves hurriedly.
Senor Yamamoto: He'll find us wherever we go. Like Ashcroft
Ken: hi rich, long time no see
Fong, Dexter: Freq!
Freq Man: Probation... well I never...
Senor Yamamoto: Don't follow the balls when they make the street
Deputy Dan: Gracias. Mi Tio es infermo, pera las carraterra es verde...
nurse judy: freqed out
Senor Yamamoto: oi FM
Merlyn: but you went all the way to 11
Cease: allo?
||||||||| Catherwood ushers Tut into the room, accepts a grimy quarter as a gratuity, mumbles something about 11:12 PM, then departs.
Fong, Dexter: Tut Tut
Freq Man: My amp only goes to 11
nurse judy: the king arrives
Cease: i seem to have lost my connection to the chat
Ken: tutankhamen has arrived :)
Senor Yamamoto: Tut ?
Tut: 'ello all
Senor Yamamoto: Cat yr here
Fong, Dexter: We can read you Cat
||||||||| Catherwood enters with Cat close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 11:13 PM tree-stunting plans, and runs off to the Aviary.
Deputy Dan: Was ist das Tutankhamen?
Cat: i was cut off
nurse judy: my mummy
||||||||| Merlyn aka 'The Reaper' has killed off Cease at 11:13 PM
Freq Man: Reading's fine... but can you copy... over
Senor Yamamoto: I may go back to radio prisim, I'm gonna see if i can get on at a locat estacion at weekends
Tut: ist das dummy in das box
nurse judy: what again cease ceases to be
Cat: i'd walk a million miles for one of her smiles
Deputy Dan: stone walls do not a prism make...
Ken: cat, didn't know you were jewish. "cut off"?
Cat: but a civil war lost, per chance
Fong, Dexter: Nor gay bars a cell
nurse judy: the eyes of the mummy ma
Deputy Dan: doo dah, doo dah...
Freq Man: and people with crystal balls should never throw stones...
Deputy Dan: How 'bout Magic 8 balls?
Fong, Dexter: ...or cross their legs
Cat: how's it going, freq?
nurse judy: cum un ze hear
Senor Yamamoto: I had crystal balls once, had to go to a urologist for it
Freq Man: Going well... and swell...
Tut: and people with crystal stones should never throw....?
Deputy Dan: Hope the crystals finally dissolved.
Cat: doing radio?
Ken: when you have crystal balls, can you get them wet, rub them with your fingertips, and make them "sing"?
Cat: crystal sets?
nurse judy: crystal set
Deputy Dan: That's your harmpnium.
Senor Yamamoto: Maybe
Fong, Dexter: Need a Cat's whisker for my crystal set
nurse judy: Cat we be on same wave length
Senor Yamamoto: I'm gonna see if I can get on as a Jazz Presenter
Ken: in my case, short wave :(
Deputy Dan: Just a bunch of freaquencies.
Freq Man: Cat... Radio/Audio theatre actually... Fort Worth paper is going to do a big feature in a few weeks on the resurgence of audio theatre... Texas Radio Theatre is (hopefully) going to be a big part of the story...
Cat: the crystal ship. an early door
Fong, Dexter: SY: Can you do a PeeWee marquette imitation?
Cat: wow. i better send you/ them some Seem Real Theatre
Ken: freq: when/if that happens, and you are aired, let me know and i'll alert my friends in your area to listen
Cat: our latest play will be coming out in April
Deputy Dan: All right!
Merlyn: and it's about the latest play, right?
Merlyn: like two years?
nurse judy: Texas radio and the big beat?
Senor Yamamoto: Peee Wee Marquette? The famuos trouser trout trapper?
Ken: the latest play is usually 4th and inches
Cat: starring, you, dex, el, doc, tiny, 3 of the firesign, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc
nurse judy: do the trouser press baby
Freq Man: Ken... we perform in front of audiences EVERY month... check out our schedule... March is going to be play I've been working THREE effing years on... an adaptation of Ed Wood's Plan 9
Merlyn: who's missing, bergman?
Fong, Dexter: Cat: Still waiting for Doc to get in touch about redoing a line or 2
Cat: i wrote it in late 97-early 98 right after neal amid, which i finished in july, 97.
nurse judy: do a line for me
Deputy Dan: All of Us want to know about the future, because it is where you and I will spend the rest of our lives...
Fong, Dexter: Achooooo!
Ken: freq: shoot me your web address and i will give it to my tx friends. kendeb52 at yahoo dot com
Cat: inspired by the nasa rover roaming around mars, then a show on the dalai lama, then the latest mars update from i think aug of that year
Freq Man: that way you can be fresh!!!
Cat: dan, not necessarily
Freq Man: www.texasradiotheatre.com
Merlyn: "We better get a cab before we drown in liquid gloom"
nurse judy: do i get to wear the cashmiere in your space station
Cat: tiny sent me that url, when he was still alive
Cat: you will never drown in liquid gloom, merl
Ken: tnx, opening it now, will forward the link tonight
Freq Man: Deputy Dan... yes... Criswell doesn't show up to the radio version... so Ed has to stand in and say that great line about "the future"
Cat: yeah, i can still rewrite and edit lines almost the day before its finished. i love that about this particular art
Deputy Dan: That was a great line. I still laugh at it, and Criswell's spit curl.
Tut: Is the color of the future Tan-Grey ?
nurse judy: Criswell predicted this
Cat: couldn't do that in magazine lands, where you had to be at the printer and forever held to that
Freq Man: actually my version of the play mentions that earth is developing weapons of mass destruction...
Deputy Dan: Martin Landau and I were in Target, with him doing all the lines from P9FOS, he's so funny.
Freq Man: the aliens are governed by the United Planets Security Council
Cat: as opposed to Energy destruction? how newtonian
Ken: why mass destruction? does everyone hate the catholics that much?
nurse judy: Freq isn't everybody?
Deputy Dan: Me too.
Freq Man: HA!
Merlyn: when did you hook up with landau, DD?
Freq Man: Auditions for Plan 9b (the b is for better) are Friday and Saturday... info is on the website...
Deputy Dan: He used to come to my Hollywood Xmas show.
Merlyn: he learned them for ed wood, I'd guess
nurse judy: good bela mushroomers
Deputy Dan: He sat in the front row, with a hat pulled over his face, until Phil Everly made him take it off.
Tut: so 9f would be for fabulous
nurse judy: I knew ed when he just a splinter
Merlyn: weapons of mass media
Ken: i'm waiting for 9x (the nude version)
Deputy Dan: Roger Ebert has reached Critical mass.
Freq Man: Next month we do an adaptation of Alice's adventures under Ground... and people are already standing in line to audition for that one...
nurse judy: I spent a day with conrad brooks
Senor Yamamoto: Cool
Merlyn: shouldn't they be standing underground?
Freq Man: Tut... I think I might use that line... Plan 9f... thanks!!!!
Senor Yamamoto: I spent a day w/robert conrad
Tut: you are most welcome
Senor Yamamoto: Merl: or on their heads
Deputy Dan: That's like a day without sunshine
nurse judy: SY; you're lucky
Ken: ok, if we are going to drop names, i talked to donny osmond on the phone once!
Merlyn: did you knock batteries off his shoulders?
Freq Man: Merlyn... that depends on how big the hole is...
Tut: although I might wait for 9x also, hehehe
Senor Yamamoto: If I get on BTW, the radio station does webcast
Deputy Dan: I AM Donny Osmond
nurse judy: donald duck called me on the phone
Merlyn: bonnie raitt babysat me
Fong, Dexter: You'll tell us the call letters SY?
Ken: depdan: can i have marie on loan for the weekend?
Merlyn: last week
Cat: about the only celebrities i ever met were the firesign theatre
Cat: about the only celebrities i ever met were the firesign theatre
Cat: who needs more?
Senor Yamamoto: And I'll burn Mrs. Cat's "Yamamoto Experience" intro and use that
nurse judy: merlyn: how do you rate
Merlyn: redundancy dept again
Tut: I met Ray Oiler
Fong, Dexter: And that's our Multiple Identity poster boy for these area
Senor Yamamoto: Dex: you betcha
Merlyn: my parents knew john raitt
Tut: Utility infielder for the '68 California Angels
Deputy Dan: Marie is up for grabs...
Cat: bonny was your babysitter, eh, merl?
Merlyn: is anyone here john rice?
Ken: i will grab above the waist and below the neck, thank you very much
nurse judy: i went to church with Jonny temple
Fong, Dexter: Think not Merl
Senor Yamamoto: On alternate Tuesdays
Ken: i went to temple with johnny church
Freq Man: I don't know anybody... :(
Senor Yamamoto: John "Brown" Rice(i'm so PC)
Tut: He batted .203 that year, what a great year that was
Cat: moldering in his grave?
Deputy Dan: My psychiatrist's mom is Buddy Ebsen.
nurse judy: i batted an eyelash at him
Merlyn: buddy ebsen is somebody's mom?
Freq Man: My psychiatrist can beat up yours
Deputy Dan: What time does he get up?
Cat: mt kylash in the blink of an eyelash
Senor Yamamoto: Ooh, batted w/an eyelash....
Freq Man: define up
Senor Yamamoto: ow
Cat: sorry, can't help quoting from Red Shift
Tut: psychiatrist to-klu-klux klansman: Check under the hood ?
nurse judy: the mote in god's eye
Deputy Dan: The point is mote.
Freq Man: Two words... Phil Collins
Dave is tired
Tut: Hey Dave !
Merlyn: you're on wheels?
Deputy Dan: Two more...Oscar Meyer
nurse judy: drum him out
Merlyn: lol tut
Tut: Baloney
Senor Yamamoto: Salami
Deputy Dan: gesundheit!
Freq Man: escarot
nurse judy: why doesn't om have a baloney wagon?
Tut: I will see your salami and raise you a lady finger
Deputy Dan: Because you never sausage a vehicle.
||||||||| Dexter Fong waltzes in at 11:32 PM carrying an obsidian door knocker.
Senor Yamamoto: Oho
Deputy Dan: And you will NOT see my salami.
||||||||| Merlyn aka 'The Reaper' has killed off Fong, Dexter at 11:32 PM
Dave: there aren't many Oscar Meyer commercials here in Denver for some reason, I justnoticed that
Dexter Fong: Ohio
Senor Yamamoto: Multiple identity
||||||||| Catherwood announces "It's 11:32 PM; let's see who falls in through our celebrity trap door!" -- he pulls a lever, and Phil Austin plummets onto the oriental shag rug.
Ken: hey pa!
Phil Austin: Good Evening, all
Dexter Fong: Howdy Phil
Senor Yamamoto: oi
Merlyn: evening phil
Cat: hey phil
nurse judy: PA to the rescue on cue
Deputy Dan: Howdy Mr. PA
Tut: Phil-ster
Freq Man: Golly, it's Phil... greetings!
Cat: how's it going?
Ken: i am almost jealous. he gets red letters and i'm in black
Senor Yamamoto: I think i'll be impressed
Phil Austin: Anything interesting going on?
Senor Yamamoto: or my pants will be pressed
Freq Man: black is more slimming...
Dexter Fong: uh................
nurse judy: not reality
Ken: we were just waiting for you not to show up, but you have now disappointed us
Deputy Dan: Hey, careful.
Merlyn: we can't talk behind your back anymore
Dave: hope the fall didn't hurt, need someone to put a pad under that rug
Cat: you read the Earle Birney poem, phil?
Freq Man: Interesting?... perhaps Auditions for Plan 9b from the Deadly Planet of Death on Friday in Austin Texas...
Phil Austin: Wow, a full lineup tonight. It's too bad I'm not here
Ken: but, into every life a little rain must fall
Cat: some of the other bloggers seemed to take offence
Freq Man: perhaps not...
Senor Yamamoto: FST members NEVER show up when I'm here-a peerfect record r0ined
nurse judy: hair piece
Freq Man: make that Arlington Texas... oops...
Tut: I hear that Red is the new Black
Cat: oh, how can you not be, in two places at once, if youre...
Senor Yamamoto: NJ I have loads of hair
Phil Austin: Yam: congrats, your record is intact. I'm not here even in spirit
Dave: hair lip
Ken: phil, i'm glad you are here, but tell us if the inspectors are done with your back yard now, and did they find the missile silos?
Deputy Dan: Is it on your head, SY?
Senor Yamamoto: I can be in two places at once, do it all the time
nurse judy: that's the ticket
Cat: stendahl? i thought you'd departed
Senor Yamamoto: Dan: I'm not telling
Deputy Dan: He can't depart, without dehair.
nurse judy: 2 places line line stolen from grouch and carmen miranda?
Senor Yamamoto: Nair Guards?
Freq Man: stolen is such a harsh woid
Ken: and denial is not just a river in egypt (to quote someone else)
Deputy Dan: Don't be depilatory.
Phil Austin: ken: only wheat silos, I'm afraid. I have no weapons of Grain destruction
Tut: recycled ?
nurse judy: ah, borrowed
Deputy Dan: A Nair do well.
Ken: don't be corny with us, please!
Cat: imagine: live commentary from the war on iraq, from Phil and Phil and Phil and Phil
nurse judy: a depiliated woodpecker am i
Cat: a new record, every time
Freq Man: improved as the caterpiller might say...
Deputy Dan: If it were corn, they'd be weapons of maize destruction.
Senor Yamamoto: See being a GOOD american, I can have all te weapons of mass destruction I want
Phil Austin: Any appearances tonight by other Fst members?
Merlyn: hey, I played the Goons' "1985", which has the line "It's great to be alive, in 1985", which resembles a line in eat or be eaten
Dexter Fong: heh
Senor Yamamoto has tactical n00ks
Cat: is that possible?
nurse judy: just non appearances, as usual
Phil Austin: Merle: there's just no accounting for coincidence
Merlyn: no others phil, though I reminded PB and PP about it in an earlier email today...
Deputy Dan: It's not only possible, it's deniably plausible.
Freq Man: Phil, tell that to Disney...
Senor Yamamoto: Plausible deiability is my favorite
Deputy Dan: Coincidences happen all at the same time.
Tut: If only I knew then, what I don't know now
Deputy Dan: When it rains, I coincide.
Cat: hey phil, what happend to Hour HOur? did your contract run out? did you same something to get you kicked off?
Senor Yamamoto: Tommy is hanging out in front of the computer
nurse judy: ticked away?
Ken: tommy, can you hear me???
Senor Yamamoto: Toad away?
Tut: Ah, what if Tommy had played PC games instead of PinBall
Deputy Dan: See me, feel me.
Dexter Fong: Cat: Think it might have been a format change
Phil Austin: cat: don't remember. Was Hour Hour the second or first of the KPFK series?
Cat: aha
nurse judy: neck tie party?
Deputy Dan: Shoot me.
Senor Yamamoto: Eck
Deputy Dan: Yes?
Senor Yamamoto dons his Flak jaquet
Dexter Fong: PA: I *believe it was the first...before it was at other stations
nurse judy: johnny Eck?
Cat: no, it was KPPC. i was in la the summer of 70 and taped 6 of them but then it ended abruptly in mid july
Deputy Dan: The Ecks Men
Dexter Fong: Cat: You're right
Senor Yamamoto: Distant relative to the Duke of oooogh
Phil Austin: About hourhour: I have a feeling it was as much as we and they could stand. The shows were not a whole lot of fun to do and there was no money, of course.
Cat: i wanted to post your Demilitarization rap with Bergman and Ossman as Privare Parts on your site but my hard drive died yesterday. i think Westly has the clips now
nurse judy: too hot to handle
Senor Yamamoto: This cat is driving me nuts
Deputy Dan: Didn't Dr. Demento start at KPPC?
Merlyn: yeah, I should have whatever you've put up, cat
Cat: that would explain it
Phil Austin: Oh, kppc. Hmmmm. might have been a format change indeed. don't remember, although I have vivid memories of the studio and doing the shows themselves.
nurse judy: lp duty?
Senor Yamamoto: He's hanging right in front odf the screen
Cat: if it's ok with phil and the other guys, eh?
Freq Man: Producing audio theatre for no money... that sounds familiar...
nurse judy: kp that is
Merlyn: we can all sleep soundly tonight, the cops found Cher's stolen wig
Cat: i've been doing it for years, freq.
Deputy Dan: Getting paid, that doesn't happen very often.
Ken: i did kp in the air force. hated it
nurse judy: at least you can eat peanuts
Freq Man: Cat... so what did you want to send me?
Dexter Fong: PA: I believe Harry Shearer was also on the air on KPPC at that time?
Senor Yamamoto: Getting paid and getting laid, rare pleasures indeed
Cat: Destination Music
Phil Austin: I'm getting paid now for non-appearances. In Imaginary money.
Deputy Dan: sY: Not the way I do it.
Senor Yamamoto: I was a corpsman, No mess duty for me
Tut: At least you dont have to worry about inflation with imaginary money
Freq Man: We're getting our audience members to donate 5 bucks now... we're able to cover our operating costs FINALLY
Phil Austin: I don't remember Harry on the air. I think maybe Shadoe Stevens was on for long sets, but i might be confusing that with KROQ
nurse judy: if we don't play, well that runs into money
Dexter Fong: SY: YOu were dead?
Cat: if only you could live an Imaginary life
Cat: for you, freq
Freq Man: How much if we DON'T rehearse...
Senor Yamamoto puts a fiver in his floppy slot
Merlyn: It's An Imaginary Life
Deputy Dan: If they don't pay, I just don't...
nurse judy: you couldn't afford it
Senor Yamamoto: I have a cat who wants something, but I don't know what
Deputy Dan: Thank you.
Cat: i want something but i dont know what either. or wait....
Freq Man: Our cat is having kittens as we chat... and my wife thought it was going to be a sedate evening... ah ha haha ha hah a
Deputy Dan: I don't want anything, and cats follow me.
Senor Yamamoto: He's driving me nuts
||||||||| Catherwood ushers doctec into the room, accepts a grimy quarter as a gratuity, mumbles something about 11:46 PM, then departs.
doctec: hi gang
Deputy Dan: SY: It's a short drive.
Senor Yamamoto: Doc
Senor Yamamoto: c
Phil Austin: evening, doctor
Senor Yamamoto: tec
Freq Man: Shiver me timbers...
Senor Yamamoto: bah
Senor Yamamoto: stupid lag
doctec: just got back from dinner & shooting pool with the Lilimeister
Ken: hey tom, and bye to all, it's beddy-bye time here.
Deputy Dan: Doctor, doctor, give me the news.
Tut: NJ: excellent line
nurse judy: doct eck little johnny
doctec: hope I haven't missed all the exposition
Senor Yamamoto: Nite Keen
Freq Man: Ah Doctechhhhhhhh Hola!
Ken: doc: page 42 in your script :)
Deputy Dan: No, the tents are still up.
Tut: Nite Ken
Phil Austin: nite, ken
||||||||| Around 11:47 PM, Ken walks off into the sunset...
doctec: now lemme get this straight you put the lime in the coconut and drank it all up...
nurse judy: i shot a birdie
doctec: wow, freqster - long time no see!
Senor Yamamoto: How do you get a lime in those little holes?
||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and Hideo Wallbanger disembarks at 11:48 PM.
Deputy Dan: Nite Ken.
doctec: it's magic, senor
Hideo Wallbanger: Night Ken
Hideo Wallbanger: Hey Doc
Senor Yamamoto: Oho
Hideo Wallbanger: OI
nurse judy: senor wences
Senor Yamamoto: Hideo
Freq Man: yes yes yes... you must visit us in Texas soon and see/hear one of our shows... (or maybe I'll bring them up when I next visit CT)
doctec: i'd love that freq
Hideo Wallbanger: <----DF
Freq Man: that was to DT
Senor Yamamoto: DT's, Librium STAT!
nurse judy: od
Hideo Wallbanger: Very idd Nurse
Senor Yamamoto was a nurse at one time
Freq Man: I've already convinced one of my co-writers to move from Missouri down here... just a matter of time... isn't there an equation there?
||||||||| Deputy Dan runs out the back door as Mayor P'nisnose blasts through the front door holding a shotgun and shouting "Where's Deputy Dan?! It's 11:50 PM and my ballot boxes haven't been stuffed yet!"
Hideo Wallbanger: Night DD
||||||||| Outside, the 11:50 PM downtown bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving Captain Equinox coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes.
Senor Yamamoto: gnite
Cat: high dee hideo
Captain Equinox: Cough, cough...
Freq Man: It's not so much as an after life... it's more of an apres vie...
doctec: nite senor yammy
Senor Yamamoto: good morning nearly
Hideo Wallbanger: Captame Equinox!
Captain Equinox: apres vous.
Cat: capt, did you kill deputy dan?
Merlyn: it's equimux
nurse judy: equine fever
Senor Yamamoto: Apres VOUS, Senor
Captain Equinox: Howdy Hideo, Merlyn, Phil.
Captain Equinox: Cat, Nurse, Senyor Y
Tut: After life, now there a concept
Senor Yamamoto: oi and/or oi
Captain Equinox: Freq, Tut, Dex, Dave
Captain Equinox: except after si
doctec: i'm going to put lili on for a few words...
Senor Yamamoto: non, non, non
Phil Austin: Hello captain
Captain Equinox: I just wanted to say Hi. I was Deputy Dan until a minute ago.
nurse judy: lucious lili
Freq Man: We were going to present a Captain Midnight along with our next show... but they're all so boring... no resolution... the most exciting thing about CM are the premiums and secret codes...
||||||||| Lili Lamont sneaks in around 11:53 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last week's "unpleasant incident."
Captain Equinox: No need to get up, Phil.
Hideo Wallbanger: "Kids! Be sure to drink your Ovaltine"
Cat: hi lili
Hideo Wallbanger: Hi Lillie
Hideo Wallbanger: Lili
Cat: hey, we're just getting higher and higher
Senor Yamamoto: I tore the top of my work van, but it's too big for an envelope, now what do I do?
Senor Yamamoto: Lili
Captain Equinox: Hi Lili
Freq Man: I found one Capt Midnight script where the Captain spends about 2 pages talking about how an internal combustion engine works (brought to you by Shelly Oil)
nurse judy: lili livered
Lili Lamont: That's me, honey. How are all of you?
Tut: Hi Lili, Hi Ho
Captain Equinox: Freq: Does he explain how emissions are killing us all?
Senor Yamamoto: okiedokie
Freq Man: or was it Skelly...
Hideo Wallbanger: Together now
Senor Yamamoto: Skelly
Freq Man: oh well...
nurse judy: too droned to sting
Cat: well, your partner in the military Phil Austin is theoreticlaly here
Freq Man: Mobil... Esso... Exxon... BP
Hideo Wallbanger: CE: CM did *not* talk about emisions
Tut: Shellby ?
nurse judy: it's a gas
Senor Yamamoto: All one now
Captain Equinox: You sound uncertain, Professor Heisenberg.
Cat: sting? help, it's the police
Senor Yamamoto: and only $2.40 a gallon
Freq Man: CM liked internal combustion engines... he liked pistons... and radial engines... oh yeah... the power... the stick... the cockpit...
Hideo Wallbanger: These ghosts in the machine don't care
nurse judy: wankel
Cat: we pay over 4$ here, yank
Lili Lamont: Hey, Cat, sorry to hear about your hard drive. I hate when that happens...
Senor Yamamoto: Kinky, FM
Captain Equinox: It's only $1.90/gal in the Pacific Northwest, because of the fine war they're planning.
Tut: Ya but that is $4 by the liter
Senor Yamamoto: Cat you have no luck at all
nurse judy: buy electric car stock!
Lili Lamont: If it weren't for bad luck...
Freq Man: I was just in San Jose this weekend... I was FLOORED when I saw the gas prices... I got a 6 pack of beer instead...
Captain Equinox: Stock cars?
Senor Yamamoto: I'm buing a bulge-mobile
Merlyn: can't it just be paper car stock?
Hideo Wallbanger: My wife drives a Prius (hybrid gas/electric)
Cat: ok, the only real bummer is that i didnt back up the file with my dreams of bit since the new computer, which isnt' a lot. still, to lose any is, again, a magnificiation of the loss
Senor Yamamoto: I'll lend you my powerbook 190
nurse judy: bored under a bad firesign
Cat: as if,
Merlyn: tried any data recovery, cat?
doctec: freq: what kind of mileage do you get from a six pack of beer?
Captain Equinox: They really can recover quite a lot, Cat.
Cat: how does one do that, merl?
nurse judy: are you in recovery?
Freq Man: doc ... it depends where you want to go...
Senor Yamamoto: You'd be surprised
Captain Equinox: You call up the data recovery guys, next to the freeway in Burbank.
Lili Lamont: Speaking for myself, since I still have no bathroom, I would get really good mileage.
nurse judy: what are the 12 steps?
Merlyn: there are various programs to recover files from damaged disks
Cat: the dell dude shows up tomoro aft with new hard drive. can i mine the old one for lost files before then?
Senor Yamamoto: No batroom?
Captain Equinox: Yes, you aren't doing anything else with it, are you?
Cat: same bat time, same bat station
Tut: And various companies that will try and recover data for you also, at a price
Senor Yamamoto: Cat see if you can install the old drive in the new 'puter
Freq Man: do cats eat bats... do bats eat cats??? only in the batroom
Lili Lamont: It's being redesigned. It's being brought from the 19th century to the 21st.
Cat: you mean give it to dell to cart away? not unless i dont have to
Merlyn: doc would know more about PC file recovery
Senor Yamamoto: I do that all the time
Captain Equinox: Just get a longer HD ribbon cable, and hang it on the end.
Senor Yamamoto: Yep
doctec: capt: they made him try a reformat of the drive over the phone, he'll need to use one of those data recovery services to try and get his data back
Cat: ok i'll ask em tomoro i dont want to discard the drive if i can recover those files from it
Captain Equinox: Ouch.
nurse judy: gabe dell?
Captain Equinox: It's worth a try, Cat.
Senor Yamamoto: I've recovered and bounced more files than you can shake a stick at
Cat: yeah, i was very derressed when he told me to reformat. i knew what i'd lose
nurse judy: give 'em dell harry
||||||||| Catherwood walks in wearing his pyjamas, yawns, and mumbles "It's midnight here in New York city"...then he falls over and starts snoring loudly..
Tut: did it reformat ?
Captain Equinox: You haven't necessarily lost it all, Cat.
Senor Yamamoto: I recovered a buncha my '98 website files. I may post them again someday
Cat: yeah, it's now empty, except for YOU
Lili Lamont: Why in grid's name would anyone want to shake a stick at it? This accomplishes nothing, unless you're a certified witch doctor.
Captain Equinox: Did anybody else save any of Tiny Dr. Tim's site?
nurse judy: how does a witch dr. get certified these days?
Phil Austin: I'm back. Are we discussing Tiny?
Captain Equinox: Microsoft Certified Witch Doctor and Shaman (MCWDS)
doctec: you can still get to a lot of TDT's site via the Wayback Machine (www.archive.org)
Cat: isnt it on archives.com or whartever that's caled? i want to extract my tales of the seattle trips from that site for myseemreal.com site
Tut: you may still be able to get some data via a data recovery service.
Cat: yes we are, phil.
Senor Yamamoto: Wayback's bad w/links
Cat: i heard the new santana album throughout europe and every time, thought of him
doctec: Yes, Capt. E was wondering if anyone managed to snag pages from Tiny's site before it vanished
Captain Equinox: I pulled down as much of Tiny's site as I could.
Dave: hey, I gotta go, see yall next week, take care
Senor Yamamoto: I can't listen to Electrician w/o thinking of Lew
nurse judy: dave's not here
Senor Yamamoto: bye dave
Hideo Wallbanger: See yah Dave
Tut: See You later Dave
Freq Man: bye Dave...
Phil Austin: nite, Dave
Merlyn: bye dave
Captain Equinox: Bye Dave.
Freq Man: My mind is going Dave... I feel it...
Dave: "fame is but a fruit tree, so very unsound, it can never flourish, till its stock is in the ground," Nick Drake
||||||||| Dave runs out the back door as Mayor P'nisnose blasts through the front door holding a shotgun and shouting "Where's Dave?! It's 12:04 AM and my ballot boxes haven't been stuffed yet!"
Captain Equinox: Open the pod bay door, Hal.
Merlyn: hey, that wayback machine is great, doc
nurse judy: a real duck man
Senor Yamamoto: Means I'll have to die to raise my website traffic
Freq Man: For your answer... look at Van Gogh... or not...
Captain Equinox: I'd rather not.
nurse judy: go go man van gogh
Senor Yamamoto: Not now he's all skeletony and stuff
nurse judy: an ear to the wind
Freq Man: Now that's one eerie guy...
Senor Yamamoto: Lend me your ears
nurse judy: weird with a beard
doctec: Friends of mine from the Boston area run a dog-walking service - they call it "Go Dog Go"
Senor Yamamoto shaves
Freq Man: I've been waiting hundreds of years to say that....
Captain Equinox: How are you lately, Phil? Got a message from PhilP about the St. Pat's NPR Show.
Senor Yamamoto: Illegal around here if yr dog goes in the wrong place
Captain Equinox: You guys were magnificent on Valentine's Day.
Freq Man: DT... My son LOVES that book
Cat: hey doc, did you send PA your production of his lines for Red Shift?
nurse judy: you're all catholics now?
Merlyn: wow, the wayback even comes up with the cephalipod front page for firesigntheatre.com
Senor Yamamoto: Domini domini Domini
doctec: Cat: I sent him an email with links to the MP3 files a while ago
Phil Austin: cap't: I'm good lately.
klokwkdog: their pizza is lousy
doctec: Don't know if he's had a chance to listen to them yet (he went on a camping trip recently)
Captain Equinox: All right! And the bombshell? And your pack?
Cat: i am so paranoid about downloading anything or tryiing to do anything now
Freq Man: Is this being logged?
Cat: rihgt
Senor Yamamoto: I have to find the archived stuff as I don't listen to NPR
nurse judy: he's back now (se above)
Lili Lamont: Why? Is Ashcroft monitoring this?
nurse judy: so do nothing it works
klokwkdog: as long as the junta is in power, everything is being logged
Cat: not planning to move to antarctica, soon, phil?
Freq Man: Are we on? Are we on?
Hideo Wallbanger: Yes I am monitoring this
Lili Lamont: Tou bastard!
Merlyn: freq, the main room is automatically logged every thursday
Senor Yamamoto: Can you say "Carnivore"
Hideo Wallbanger: Canadian eh?
Cat: i f you haven't read Kobo Abe, I highly reccomend.
klokwkdog: according to NYT, Cat, that new hotel at the South Pole isn't finished yet, but the kitchen is open...
Phil Austin: Cat: do you think you've got a shot at winning the golden Ossman, or whatever it's called?
doctec: Lili and I have an idea for a new T-shirt design - in time for the war: "Drop Trou, Not Bombs"
Hideo Wallbanger: lol
Phil Austin: I mean in reference to your latest radio play
Cat: with yu as dalai lama? maybe. with doc as producer? i sure hope so
Lili Lamont: I'm not Canadian, but my granddaughter is.
Cat: yes, pa, ,what i've heard kick's my ass into a different species
Captain Equinox: Set me aside an XL, Doc.
Senor Yamamoto: This war sucks, ther are no good songs, just a bucha right-wingers spouting off
Phil Austin: Good luck
klokwkdog: john mellencamp. coming soon
doctec: Phil: well, the fact that your voice plays a prominent role in it bodes well (your work was excellent, btw - i have had fun editing it with all the other parts)
Senor Yamamoto: Doc gimme 2
Freq Man: I see... well I was going to give out a secret website if anyone wants to hear Texas Radio Theatre's last show... I don't mind you folks seeing it, but I didn't want the info to get to EVERYONE... so maybe I shouldn't broadcast it...
Cat: but then, i thought you as mr disner and the whole, although poorly produced by me, box of time was pretty good, in terms of words and sound effectts, not theri their mix
nurse judy: I'm not a canadian but i cat like one
Cat: never heard back form jerry steans about it at all
Phil Austin: Has Mr. Muckle been around tonight?
doctec: Freq: send us all emails instead
Hideo Wallbanger: Don't think so Phil
Cat: thanks for the good luck, phil. i do these things cuz i do these things, i have no anticipation of any one actually listening to them
nurse judy: PA he's over at the Old lompoc house
Senor Yamamoto: FM: CYamamto101 #at# aol dot com(mie)
Captain Equinox: I've listened to them, Cat, and enjoyed the experience very much.
nurse judy: the blind house detective
Freq Man: Ok... DT... I'll send it to you and you can distribute to who you think will enjoy it... the one I'd like you to hear is an original work I co-wrote about the meeting between Annie Oakly and Thomas Edison in 1894...
Cat: i am the luckiest cat in this dimension that talented folks like dex, tiny, brian, elayne, doc, lili, you, etc, etc lend your vast talents to litle day dreams of mine.
nurse judy: Annie Oakly: she sure shot his balls
Freq Man: The hook (so the news media would mention our show) was the very first episode of the Lone Ranger...
Phil Austin: Ah, the old Lompoc house. What is it Fields says at the end of the one about him moving the family to california. there's a repeated line ... no, I'm wrong. It's the odd moment where he runs off chasing something ...
Captain Equinox: And now...for MOST HUMBLE...the nominees are Cat...
Hideo Wallbanger sings "What a day for a daydream"
Cat: but she didtnt shoot the deputy
Senor Yamamoto: Back to Balls, eh?
Senor Yamamoto has no humility
Lili Lamont: Even Walter Mitty dreams should be realized.
Cat: i gotta nickle. wait for me
Captain Equinox: pocketa pocketa queep
Hideo Wallbanger: SY: Hang around will humiliate you for you
nurse judy: It's a gift
Senor Yamamoto: I don't need humility, laboring in obscurity is enough for me
Phil Austin: It's a gift, thanks Judy
nurse judy: the balls were glass too
doctec: Colorado Beefsteak Mines, Mr. Sou-zaaayy
klokwkdog: billions of folks all over the world aspire to that, SY
Phil Austin: It's not an ice cream wagon, but ...
Captain Equinox: Egbert Souse, a bibulous resident of Lompoc...
nurse judy: cumquats cumquats!
Hideo Wallbanger: Doc: Was that kaiser Sou-zaaayy?
Captain Equinox: I beg your pardon!
nurse judy: accent grob over the e
Freq Man: DT... I know I have your email address... but I forgot it... sheesh... could you refresh my mem...
doctec: Hideo: close but no prize
doctec: OK Freq, check the bottom of your web browser screen in a moment
klokwkdog: the gimp with the limp?
Hideo Wallbanger: Well..if I knew Sou-zaaayy like you knew....
Tut: whats in your cracker jack box ?
Hideo Wallbanger: Hey Klok
Freq Man: like magic...
klokwkdog: howdi
nurse judy: lake komoko is right over that hill
nurse judy: kokomoco
Senor Yamamoto: bah
Hideo Wallbanger: Freq: Does TRT do alot of recreations from (as they say) "The Golden Age of Radio"?
Cat: hey doc, how goes the search for missing lines in the stenshoel discs?
Senor Yamamoto: I gotta figure a way to dredge up more traffic for my road site
nurse judy: like rocky
Hideo Wallbanger: SY: Open a mall
Captain Equinox: Candy coated popcorn peanuts and a prize.
klokwkdog: install a traffic control device, SY; take a clue from the public sector...
doctec: Cat: between last night & tonight, have not had time to review them (the pkg just arrived yesterday afternoon)
Freq Man: Hideo... yes... I try to do 1 third recreations (lost episodes would be the aim) and 2 thirds original works.
doctec: First thing tomorrow when i get home from work I'll start in on that
Senor Yamamoto: Hmm, a stip mall would do it
Freq Man: The news papers really love it when you do a Green Hornet or a Shadow... but I prefer (and folks have told me they enjoy) our original plays better.
doctec: Judging from the labels (and the fact that there are six tapes), I'm pretty sure they're in there
nurse judy: a strip maul?
Hideo Wallbanger: I've been a regular attendee at "The Friends of Old TIme Radio COnventions for a number of years now Freq
Freq Man: or should I say "more"
Freq Man: www.texasradiotheatre.com for those of you just tuning in...
Senor Yamamoto: Sure
Senor Yamamoto: I could be cheap and hurl the URL
Lili Lamont: I'll do my best to stay out of his line of sight, Cat. You know how easily distracted he can be.
klokwkdog: there are enemies?
Freq Man: DT... did I tell you I sent you the email with the link and secret info?
nurse judy: 2 tons of fun
Senor Yamamoto: http:// mr_yamamoto.50megs.com try to find all the FST and Zappa references
Hideo Wallbanger: in a one ton restaurant
Captain Equinox: That's enough fun for me NJ
nurse judy: url nate
Captain Equinox: one ton soup
klokwkdog: tennessee ernie wouldn't be impressed
Freq Man: pea green
Hideo Wallbanger: Dropped on the North Koreans
Senor Yamamoto: Hey Cat, you familiar w/Kazue Sawai?
nurse judy: i saw a 2 ton prairie dog
Hideo Wallbanger: Really NJ? =)
klokwkdog: we'll starve those Koreans into compliance sooner or later...
nurse judy: in the bad lands
doctec: freq: it has not arrived in my email box yet
Freq Man: Why stop there...
Hideo Wallbanger: Klok: Shame....We don't starve them...we just don't give them anyfood
Freq Man: keep checking... it's in my out box... so it's enroute...
Hideo Wallbanger: Like Amelia Earhardt
nurse judy: i eat a 2 ton chili dog there, well it seemed like it
klokwkdog: soon we'll make them just like the South
Senor Yamamoto thiks of the OM weienermobile w/chili
Hideo Wallbanger: Stealing our Jobs? Klok
klokwkdog: producing memory chips below cost and putting more thousands of workers in Idaho out of a job
Freq Man: 1 part corn... 1 part sugar... 1 part beer... 1 box lotto tickets = 1 7-11
Senor Yamamoto saw the OM weienermobile once on the IH 84
nurse judy: insect chips?
Senor Yamamoto: Pure Protien, that
Captain Equinox: buffalo chips
klokwkdog: Micron just hemmoraged 10% of its work force
Cat: nurse, too bad dave not hear for that line. he's in denver
Senor Yamamoto: Who hasn't?
nurse judy: how much does the weiner moblie weigh? 2 Tons?
Cat: lili do you miss not going into battle next week?
Captain Equinox: Boeing's moved to Chicago, and is in the movie distribution biz.
Captain Equinox: They just made airplanes when I was growing up.
Senor Yamamoto: NJ: it's bigger than a van-I'd say at least 4
nurse judy: dave's not hear
Senor Yamamoto: 16 tons, and what do you get?
klokwkdog: that's all we can do now, but Bollywood is moving up fast
nurse judy: boing went the strings of my heart
Freq Man: How does a starving country view a hot dog eating contest???
Lili Lamont: Cat: Not really. Actually, a friend of mine suggested I check out the federal jobs site. I did, and although there is more there than the NYT, one either has to be a fed employee, or be willing to join the AF Reserve. Gack!
Hideo Wallbanger: Avidly?
klokwkdog: the gangsters running their biz work cheaper than ours
Phil Austin: a little bit older and deeper in debt
nurse judy: I give up
Senor Yamamoto: Gave up that debt stuff
Captain Equinox: I owe my soul to the company store.
Senor Yamamoto: Sto' rather
nurse judy: debit or levit
Phil Austin: St. Peter don't you something me ...
Merlyn: trivia fact: only a muslim could eat at all McDonald's in the world, since two are in mecca
Hideo Wallbanger: Neither a borrower nor a lender be; you just want to middle the deal
Cat: as soon as i get my editng software working, pa, i've got a job for oona
Cat: or at least a video about said
Lili Lamont: Phil: I did 7 years in the Air Farce, and that's enough indentured servitude for me.
klokwkdog: hey lili, I was thinking of contacting the Oil, Chemical and Atomic workers union about helping organize the Iraqi workers next month after the war
Cat: former firesign sound effect guy Peter Stenshoel is off to st. petersburg as we speak.
nurse judy: oil vey
Cat: where my father's father is from.
Phil Austin: Cat: no way will you get oona. We had to physically drag her into the studio for her one line on boomdotbust. She hates it.
Senor Yamamoto: I did 11 in the navy and army. What a waste of tie, I coulda gopt to college and had my head filled w/lies and gotten good sex
Lili Lamont: Klok: Brilliant idea. See if they need any IT workers.
nurse judy: stalin's grad?
Cat: no, it;s just a video play called "oona gets a job" phil. no actual work involved
nurse judy: she has it
Senor Yamamoto: Commie Martyrs class o'17
Freq Man: No actual work involved... hmmmm
klokwkdog: i figure they'll need IT support. at the moment, the best jobs seem to be in petroleum but the IT content is low.
Lili Lamont: SY: Why in hell did you do both? What were you on?
nurse judy: oon makes a non appearance too
Senor Yamamoto: I'm not sure
Senor Yamamoto: It wasn't good
Freq Man: I can't tell you how many movies I'm not in...
Cat: when we were cavorting about italy, we took pix of a lot of art and imagined you guys and your wives as actors in them, as opposed to being really derpressed by how depressing how all those dead jesus's were
Phil Austin: the entire austin family is expert at non-appearance. It's practically an art form
Senor Yamamoto: Mental demangement I think
Hideo Wallbanger: lol SY
nurse judy: someone offering "Consider it if You Want too" used on net site
Lili Lamont: Jeez, Louise, SY, a trip to Mexico would have set you straight. Or not, which is even better.
Senor Yamamoto: Went to Mexico a lot
Senor Yamamoto: Didn't help
nurse judy: i did a non appearence in a no play
Senor Yamamoto: Thought I might get a Socialist disease
Captain Equinox: So you aren't really here, Phil? That's a shame, you're so much fun.
Hideo Wallbanger: Ah !! No wonder I don't remember you
Captain Equinox: That's her
Cat: i hope to get the new hard drive operating soon. will have the lost firesign in you're up tapes done as soon as possible
klokwkdog: you must remember this
Phil Austin: capt: I know, it's a damn shame. If I were here, I'd probably be hellishly entertaining ...
Senor Yamamoto: Now I don't have to go to Mexico, cos al;l the Mexicans are here
nurse judy: a congress of wonders
Freq Man: DT... any sign of that super secret secret email?
Phil Austin: Hideo: gee, I forget you too. what a coincidence
Cat: is roller maidens really happening on cd, phil?
nurse judy: it's a secret
Freq Man: makes strange bedfellows...
Phil Austin: nurse j: Do you remember congress of Wonders? ever see them?
Hideo Wallbanger: Maybe you know my late partner, Dexter Fong?
Captain Equinox: He can forget two persons at the same time...
doctec: Whereas I'd be interestingly hellish...
Senor Yamamoto: I can do 3 or more
Phil Austin: cat: according to laff.com it is. I'm dealing with them now about booklet copy and cover
Senor Yamamoto: I'd just be hellish
nurse judy: bush interupted wrestling tonight but bugged off in time for cage match he wanted to see
doctec: I have a C.O.W album - never saw them live tho
Captain Equinox: I'd just be.
Hideo Wallbanger: Who won NK?
Phil Austin: doc: they were sort of wonderful, in an odd way
Hideo Wallbanger: ?
nurse judy: PA what was the bonus 45 a bonus to (Dick Private's Mystery)
Hideo Wallbanger: NJ? sheessh
Senor Yamamoto: Any clue if a Child's Garden of Grass will ever come out?
Hideo Wallbanger: I have that Album SY
Phil Austin: senyor y: I had nothing to do with that, and I'd be the last to know. Or am I on it?
Senor Yamamoto: I used to
Hideo Wallbanger: PA: What *are* you on?
Cat: childs garden was bergman
nurse judy: PA: no PB and your x
Freq Man: If you were, they still wouldn't tell ya... - or would they?
Phil Austin: nurse: refresh my memmory. What are we talking about?
klokwkdog: was it before or after The Seventh Seal, Cat?
Cat: pa was on the astrology album, right? i've never heard itl also a cassady other than neal
doctec: Bergman was in Child's Garden of Grass - he sings the "Dirty Dog" song in the shower scene
Phil Austin: I t;hink I'm the only voice on the astrology album
klokwkdog: I thought he did mainly religious and emotional stuff
nurse judy: PA the epic single " bonus record" Dick Privates, Switchblde pitchforks, Bad News
Captain Equinox: Cat: Was it David Cassady?
Cat: was it ever released on cd? just a relic of its period?
Phil Austin: hideo: I'm high on life, of course, if you've got anything ...
Cat: ask phil, sam
Hideo Wallbanger: Hopalong?
Freq Man: it was never OFFICIALLY released on CD...
Captain Equinox: The book was very funny.
nurse judy: i smoked the book got a headache
Cat: i bought the funniest book i've thus far ever read in sienna. called the Psmith Omnibus. wodehouse at his best
klokwkdog: who did the music? Hammerstein?
nurse judy: jeeves?
doctec: Yes, Armand Hammerstein
klokwkdog: the second Shepherd's Play is pretty good, Cat ;-)
Cat: no, psmith
Hideo Wallbanger: Jeeves Hammerstein...World's most droll pianist
nurse judy: the bride of hammerstein?
Cat: oscar?
Captain Equinox: You should get an Oscar for that...
klokwkdog: no, from the Revolution: the ride of Hammerstein
Hideo Wallbanger: and ocarina Hammerstein
klokwkdog: ay carumba!
Hideo Wallbanger: oi
nurse judy: car hook
nurse judy: car hook
nurse judy: car hook
klokwkdog: also from the Revolution: the purge of Hammerstein
Captain Equinox: Oiga mi!
Lili Lamont: Klok: Sounds like Wagner to me.
nurse judy: my enter got stuck
Freq Man: well groovy dudes... it's been swell... but I must prepare for auditions tomorrow among other things... I bid you all a fondue and a fair well...
klokwkdog: i don't ever listen to his stuff, Lili. I can't forgive how he ripped off poor Tolkien
nurse judy: cheesy
Hideo Wallbanger: NJ: Have somebody turn a fire hydrant on yoyu
Senor Yamamoto: Fondue?
Cat: by freq
Senor Yamamoto: mmmmmmmm
doctec: nite freq
Captain Equinox: Fondue indeed.
Hideo Wallbanger: Night Freq
klokwkdog: jane fondue? didn't she find Jesus?
Merlyn: bye freq
nurse judy: i didn't know he was lost
Freq Man: Klok... didn't know he was lost...
klokwkdog: evening freq
Hideo Wallbanger: Night Freq
Senor Yamamoto: nite
nurse judy: there's an echo in here
Captain Equinox: Oscillator, Freq Man!
Cat: was he hiding?
klokwkdog: last i heard he was alive & well and living in an undisclosed location
Freq Man: And he goes... thusly.... thusly.... thusly.... thusly.... thusly.... thusly.... thusly.... thusly.... thusly.... thusly.... thusly....
klokwkdog: upset Ted, though; he didn't like competing with another guy, it's said
nurse judy: we've been tracking his cell phone
Captain Equinox: I've recently moved to an undisclosed location, it's nice.
Lili Lamont: Klok: JHC, did Fonda turn born again? Doc and I are horrified.
klokwkdog: i wondered about those funny footprints!
Senor Yamamoto: Good lord! Hanoi Jane?!?
klokwkdog: yes, it was a big news item a few years ago. split the marriage wide open
Lili Lamont: Capt: Who are you, Dick Cheney?
nurse judy: he's with dick cheney?
klokwkdog: yeah, do a Google
Captain Equinox: I never discuss my Dick.
nurse judy: we do all the time
klokwkdog: it's a big secret, NJ, (except in the bathouses)
Captain Equinox: Cheney.
Captain Equinox: I just step high and lively.
nurse judy: man of a 1000 heart attacks
klokwkdog: ah, like those North Korean troops on hte news every night, eh, CE?
Hideo Wallbanger: Time for me to put the cats to sleep and let my wife out, Night DFs
Lili Lamont: NJ: One will do, if it does the job.
Captain Equinox: He's in the Coronary, stunting trees.
nurse judy: we did a gaggle of googles
klokwkdog: nite HW
klokwkdog: FOLR
nurse judy: hideo gumped
Cat: am i the only person herewho has been on the border with north korea?
||||||||| "Hey Hideo Wallbanger!" ... Hideo Wallbanger turns, and sees Bradshaw approching with the handcuffs, and is dragged away, screaming "it's only 12:49 AM, I don't have to go yet!"...
Captain Equinox: I've always wanted to say "goodnight" to somebody named Hideo.
Lili Lamont: adieu, HW.
doctec: nite hideo
Senor Yamamoto: well, I must away as well
klokwkdog: Cat - not to put too fine a point on it, but for US citizens of a Certain Age, being there meant only one thing, and not too pleasant
nurse judy: PA non appearing again?
Lili Lamont: Cat: When were you there?
Cat: 74, at first, lili
klokwkdog: being in a "tour group" with a bunch of guys who dress alike
||||||||| At 12:51 AM, Senor Yamamoto vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted!
Cat: recently in late 80s. but still really poor, highly militaritzed then
Lili Lamont: Cat: In what context?
nurse judy: dropping like flies
klokwkdog: yep, that's the New Army, Cat!
Cat: anyway, what i felt then, and having taugt korean students as recently as last year,i know a lot about that place
klokwkdog: pass me that Klein Bottle
Lili Lamont: Klok: Drag queens in North Korea? Now that's weird! But then, so is this administration.
Cat: and i can tell you this. you Don't want to fuck with it
Captain Equinox: Ko map soom ni da!
Tut: Well time to get back to coughin' Nite all
klokwkdog: oh Cat! Current US diplomacy has been highly nuanced and impeccably conducted
Captain Equinox: Na noon tang sin sa rang ha da!
klokwkdog: nite tut
nurse judy: tut a gonner
||||||||| Catherwood says "12:53 AM, time for SOMEONE to leave!", grabs Tut by the collar and gives 'em the old bum's rush out the door
Captain Equinox: Yo bo sai o!
Merlyn: nite tut
Cat: in the sense that their whole consciousness is that desparate we're gonna lose as we're back in the corner sense, but we've been there for 2 thousand years, and like any rat, we'll defend ourselves to a Whole Lot of Your Deaths
Lili Lamont: Born in Babylonia, moved to Arizona, nite Tut.
klokwkdog: why, every night, I hear comments about it from all over the world on the news
Cat: fuck you , kloik
nurse judy: Merlyn: did bonnie sing you to sleep?
Merlyn: not that I remember
Merlyn: I don't remember any of it, actually
nurse judy: then she must have
Captain Equinox: Isn't that in the Chinese "Art Of War" book, Cat? Never corner an adversary, he'll kill you.
Lili Lamont: Capt: Speak Engrish!
Captain Equinox: Always give him a way out, a "Golden Bridge," so he can take it.
doctec: Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer ... oh wait, that was from The Godfather...
klokwkdog: hey, we know they are bluffing! they are bluffing, right? Dick! Tell me again how they're bluffing. Dick? What undisclosed location?
nurse judy: give him a save face
Lili Lamont: Never give a sucker an even break.
Captain Equinox: Never smarten up a chump.
klokwkdog: i saw the documentary of the German NGO doctor about N. Korea. it was horrifying
nurse judy: chump has left the building
klokwkdog: never take change from a chump
doctec: OK gang, i gotta call it quits, fading fast and have a full day tomorrow
doctec: You all take care, see ya next Thurs...
klokwkdog: right b-hind u
Cat: thanks for the work doc
klokwkdog: nite DT
Cat: i'll get back to you when i have a hard drive
nurse judy: that's no chimp you chump
Captain Equinox: Good night, doc. Thanks again!
nurse judy: bye doc
Merlyn: nite doc
Lili Lamont: Since Doc is going, I think I'll join him. It's cold in New England, sort of like liviing in the north. And he's warm.
doctec: Yeah, another 5 inches of snow - you'd think it was winter here or something
nurse judy: lili leaves
Cat: you two must come and warm our cold bc shores, doc and lili
||||||||| doctec leaves to catch the 1:00 AM train to Hellmouth.
||||||||| It's 1:00 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Dexter Fong - dead from measles
||||||||| Freq Man - dead from the common cold
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
nurse judy: doctor a memory
Captain Equinox: G'night Lili.
Cat: lili a mamary
Merlyn: that was close
Captain Equinox: Wow! Just missed me.
Lili Lamont: Au revoir, buenos noches, auf weiderschein (?), whatever.....
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 1 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
nurse judy: phil's name is fading
||||||||| "1:01 AM? I'm late!" exclaims Lili Lamont, who then runs out through the French doors and down through the garden.
Captain Equinox: Well, I have to be up at four thirty, so I'm fading too.
Merlyn: It faded a bit ago; it just means he hasn't said anything for a while
Merlyn: nite mux
nurse judy: see you CE
nurse judy: down to brass tacks
Captain Equinox: Up and away....
nurse judy: i guess it's time for my non apperance
Merlyn: down to bra stacks?
||||||||| Around 1:03 AM, Captain Equinox walks off into the sunset...
Phil Austin: Back now. I'm working on Ed Woodpecker chap four off in Woodpecker world
Merlyn: that's good; phil, do you look at the firesign stats page?
nurse judy: woody is pithy
Phil Austin: see we've lost a lot of perp .. uh, participants
nurse judy: what's with you and woodpeckers anyway
Merlyn: getting late in the eastern sector
Phil Austin: nurse: I know, the Woodpecker thing is weird. It starts somewhere back in the seventies, I thing with something I wrote for the colum we had in a magazine. Creem?
nurse judy: and all the woodpeckers in cars stuff
Phil Austin: merlyn: yes, i do look at the stats page
Phil Austin: nurse J: I think the first one had to do with how many woodpeckers it takes to hold down the accelerater pedal
Merlyn: by the way, you can drop me a line to change the front page when you post a new chapter (or you can send out an announcement, remember)
nurse judy: must have been a downy woodpecker
Phil Austin: cars and woodpeckers. There's just no accounting for these things
Cat: are these the same woodpeckers that were in firezine, phil?
Phil Austin: merle: I thought I changed the front page
Phil Austin: cat: rwritten somewhat, certainly improved and, of course, larger type
Merlyn: yes, but that's just the headline & mototext; I usually also change the text on the left side
nurse judy: ivory billed
Phil Austin: nurse: pileated
||||||||| It's 1:10 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| klokwkdog - dead from jaundice
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Piliated Woodpecker enters at 1:10 AM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and runs off to the Haberdashery Barn.
Cat: i can sense a continuation from the old detective stuff to the ed woodpecker and perhaps beaver teeth. you evolution is most visible
Phil Austin: merle: Oh, I see what you mean. I'd rather have your brain working on that text. thanks
Piliated Woodpecker: You just said the secret word.
Merlyn: kwd? dep dan?
nurse judy: knock on wood
Phil Austin: evolution can be gradual or sudden, according to the late Mr. Gould
Merlyn: ok phil, just drop me a line, I don't always notice when you put up something new right away
nurse judy: when is old detecive gonna be on CD?
nurse judy: add the t
Merlyn: read something funny today; an ad from scientists refuting creationists, and, in honor of SJ Gould, they only used scientists named "steve"
Cat: the continuation from you and bergman talking about jesus in 1967 to the hour hour stuff to the hollywood nightshit stuff to now, i can follow that progression, with vast pleasure
Piliated Woodpecker: Detectives like t.
Phil Austin: nurse: that's a good idea, but I don't know. I suppose I'd have to do it myself. I'm currently doing a small rewrite on Precipice of Angels
Cat: that is an exquisite piece, phil
nurse judy: good and a ready of Ed Woody too?
Phil Austin: and a new bebop
Cat: "night spiders" one of the best audio elements i've ever heard, and i consider it my job to produce the bestaudio elemnents possible
nurse judy: will it ever end
Piliated Woodpecker: Would a new bebop be a rebop?
Cat: bebob is ever=evolutional
Cat: a b.mitchell ried of the endless now
Cat: in espanish
nurse judy: US+
Piliated Woodpecker: Buenos Noches!
Phil Austin: Well, I'm fading in more than red type. goodnight everyone. Fun talking to you all.
||||||||| Piliated Woodpecker leaves to catch the 1:15 AM train to Hellmouth.
||||||||| "Hey Phil Austin!" ... Phil Austin turns, and sees Bradshaw approching with the handcuffs, and is dragged away, screaming "it's only 1:15 AM, I don't have to go yet!"...
Merlyn: nite phil
nurse judy: time to re-non my non appearance
Cat: by phil
Merlyn: nite all...
Cat: off we go. hopefully next time i'l lhave a hard drive
nurse judy: i'm out guys
||||||||| Merlyn rushes off, saying "1:17 AM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?"
||||||||| At 1:18 AM, nurse judy vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted!
||||||||| It's 1:30 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Cat - dead from the fiddlers
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Catherwood enters, and announces to all and sundry "It's 4:32 AM, time to change the log file and clean out unused rooms; please log off for a minute or two. Thank you for your patience."

The Evening's Participants:
Phil Austin
Captain Equinox
Deputy Dan
Dexter Fong
Fong, Dexter
Freq Man
Hideo Wallbanger
Lili Lamont
nurse judy
Piliated Woodpecker
Senor Yamamoto
URL References:

Rogue's Gallery:

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PP and Cat(cease)

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Merlyn LeRoy

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LeatherG & SO

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"The Home Team"

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Peggy Blisswhips

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Audrey Farber

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Tiny Dr. Tim
Rest In Peace,
Dear Friend