A Firesign Chat


||||||||| Catherwood re-enters the Waiting Room and explains "This is the main discussion room which is logged each night."
||||||||| Catherwood announces, "The time is 4:33 AM - I now declare Thursday's chat log for July 30, 2009 officially open!"... and then, he retires back to the vestibule...
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood snorts derisively: "5:42 AM and late as usual, it's Firebroiled, just back from Washington."
Firebroiled: Yet now, as inevitable as dawn,
the Sun, arching on its axis,
rises to meet the East -- chariot-racing across the high noon desert sky,

only to plummit, like bald Icarus,

into the sensual, fermenting seas of the South Pacific

And even now,
yet, as scary night decends upon us,
we could appreciate the Wonders of Nature
as stimulating as Man’s Own Triumphs!

Let us pause . . .

Firebroiled: The Future Fair!

A Fair for All, and no fare to anybody!
Yes, it’s free!

Join the expectant crowd gathering now,
as we stop here on DUTCH ELM STREET! . . .

Come closer, folks.
Don’t crowd the wheels . . .

Doors Open!

Doors close in five seconds.

||||||||| 5:43 AM -- Firebroiled left for parts unknown.   (Entry from Nick Danger's "Idiots I Have Been Paid To Follow").
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 6:47 AM and Vampin de Lectrician steps out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
Vampin de Lectrician: Narrator: This life sized replica of the Taj Mahal made entirely out of oleomargarine houses our guru, Tiny Doctor Tim. Let's knock on the door and see if he's in.
TDT: Hello. I thought I would just drop out and say "Hello". Hello.
Narrator: Come back, Tiny Doctor Tim. We want to talk to yah.
TDT: I'm not at all happy with the flash card section! Come on, you freaks, say the word and you'll be free, say the word and be like me, say the word I'm thinking of, have you heard the word is LUV! Luuuv! Luuuv! .... Has anybody got anything for an acid stomach?
(another track)
LAPD: Check her body paint. Faded San Francisco Arte Nouveau. She must be an oldie. Are you oldy?
OLDY: Want tah hear me rap? I saw the best minds of my generation....
(taken away)
LAPD: Dig, Larry, aspirin. Better phone her in for regrooving.
BenwayIntern: How's the old folks rocko socko psycho delphic dance marathon doing?
DJ: They're dropping like flies!
(another couple)
HOTMAMA: MalcombeXeJonLenin, come on in and dig, your mother.
SON: Ah, ma, I can't right now, I've got to do my homework.
HOTMAMA: Don't lie to me, son. You're in one of those underground study cells. Aren't you? OOh! You're sooo weird!

Vampin de Lectrician: Getteth ye readye for ye olde midsummer fortenight, Catherwood.
||||||||| Catherwood walks up to Vampin de Lectrician and says "Something I can help with?"
Vampin de Lectrician: Goeth renaissance with oberon and titania and havva midsummer nights dream.
||||||||| At 6:50 AM, the lights go out! Rocky Rococo's voice pierces the inky darkness: "I've got you now, Vampin de Lectrician!" Shattering glass is heard, and then the lights come back on...
||||||||| RedPillTweeny enters at 7:38 AM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and scurries off to the Haberdashery Barn.
||||||||| It's 7:50 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| RedPillTweeny - dead from jaundice
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Catherwood enters with Bambi close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 8:58 PM tree-stunting plans, and rushes off to the anteroom.
||||||||| 8:58 PM -- Bambi left for parts unknown.   (Entry from Nick Danger's "Idiots I Have Been Paid To Follow").
||||||||| Catherwood strides up and intones "Presenting 'ah,clem', just granted probation at 8:59 PM", then leaves hurriedly.
||||||||| New CNI streaming notice: '"a few minutes with FireSign Theatre" at about 9 eastern'
||||||||| Bambi enters at 9:00 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and scurries off to the Hat Pack Annex.
||||||||| ah,clem hurries out the back door as Mayor P'nisnose blasts through the front door holding a shotgun and shouting "Where's ah,clem?! It's 9:00 PM and my ballot boxes haven't been stuffed yet!"
Bambi: hello Clem
Bambi :-)
||||||||| Merlyn tiptoes in around 9:00 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last month's "unpleasant incident."
Bambi: there ye went lol
Merlyn: hey
||||||||| Catherwood strides in with a trumpet, plays a fanfare, and proclaims "Nine PM on Thursday, July 30, 2009 - I now declare alt.comedy.firesgn-thtre's chat officially open!"
Bambi: Hey Merl
Bambi: having trouble with Catherwood lol
||||||||| Catherwood strides up to Bambi and queries "Did you want something?"
Bambi: Catherwood please pour me a double toasted almond, a bowl of tostitos and homemade salsa
||||||||| Catherwood brings Bambi a double toasted almond a bowl of tostitos and homemade salsa.
||||||||| Catherwood enters with llanwydd close behind, mumbles something about disrupting his 9:02 PM tree-stunting plans, and runs off to the sitting room.
Bambi: thank you catherwood
||||||||| Catherwood answers "You're welcome."
llanwydd: Good Evening
Bambi: hey llan
Merlyn: hi llan
llanwydd: thought you folks might be here
llanwydd: is that what you're really having, bambi?
Bambi: Catherwood please pour favorite drinks to everyone
||||||||| Catherwood brings favorite drinks to everyone.
llanwydd: sounds good anyway
Bambi: well, tostitos and homemade salsa and cold water actually
Bambi: lol
||||||||| Catherwood enters with ah,clem close behind, mumbles something about disrupting his 9:04 PM tree-stunting plans, and dashes off to the vestibule.
Bambi: speaking of which ... brb ... gonna go get some
llanwydd: I'll have a welsh coffee, catherwood
||||||||| Catherwood steps over to llanwydd and mumbles "Would you like something?"
Bambi: hey Clem
ah,clem: hello all
llanwydd: testing
llanwydd: Hi Clem
Merlyn: hi ho clem
llanwydd: enjoy your tostitos. I've had about 300 calories since monday
llanwydd: I do that sometimes
||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and cease gets out at 9:07 PM.
llanwydd: Hey C
Bambi: It's Treaty Time
Bambi: hey Cat
Merlyn: hi cat
llanwydd: catherwood, a welsh coffee, please
||||||||| Catherwood rushes up to llanwydd and mumbles "My ears are burning..."
llanwydd: he still doesn't get it
Bambi: catherwood, please pour llanwydd a welsh coffee
||||||||| Catherwood gives llanwydd a welsh coffee.
ah,clem: catherwood, pleasr give llanwydd a welsh coffee
||||||||| Catherwood hands llanwydd a welsh coffee.
llanwydd: Please, Catherwood. A Welsh Coffee. No sugar
||||||||| Catherwood steps over to llanwydd and asks "Typing my name just to rile me, eh?"
llanwydd: LOL
Bambi :-)
ah,clem: catherwood, please pour llanwydd a welsh coffee with no sugar
||||||||| Catherwood hands llanwydd a welsh coffee with no sugar.
llanwydd: LOL
cease: ho
Bambi: there ya go llanwydd ... just how you like it lol
llanwydd: thanks folks
llanwydd: I just don't know how to order
Bambi: civilization HO!
ah,clem: you gotta know how to talk to these robots
llanwydd: we've still got some corn left
Bambi: lol
ah,clem: now we can make whiskey!
cease: ah, mr. bronfman
cease: you know when he first started making whiskey, his first batch was blue
Bambi: blue?
Bambi: contaminated?
||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and llanwyd falls out at 9:15 PM.
Bambi: wb llan
cease: dont remember why. just that it was blue
ah,clem: yellow whiskey meets green copper sulfate?
cease: like the fabled blue men of morrocco
llanwydd: didn't mean to do that
cease: that owuld make sense, clem
Bambi: lol
cease: but it wasnt salable.
ah,clem: and bad whiskey, lol
cease: eventually he created Seagrams and Neal Amid was there to mock it
Bambi: yellow minus green equals blue lol
Bambi: lol
llanwydd: I thought bronfman was the canada dry guy
llanwydd: ok, now I get it
cease: at least one other intersting thing happened in Yorkton Saskatchewan
Bambi: same company roots I do believe
cease: no, the seagrams empire.
llanwydd: or canada pure
cease: he was imnporting scotch but wanted to save money by making his own
llanwydd: I got confuse
llanwydd: confused
cease: if youren ot confused by firesign, you're not paying attention
Bambi: "The Seagram Company Ltd. was a large corporation headquartered in Montreal, Quebec, Canada that was the largest distiller of alcoholic beverages in the world. Toward the end of its independent existence it also controlled various entertainment and other business ventures. The Seagram assets have since been acquired by other companies, notably PepsiCo, Diageo, and Pernod Ricard."
llanwydd: but if you're confusing now you ain't seen nothing yet
llanwydd: and you won't
llanwydd: I didnt know that bambi. that's very interesting
cease: i used to drink 20 cent beer at his Balmoral Hotel in the late 60s
llanwydd: I've never been much into distilled spirits and I've probably never tried seagrams
ah,clem: 5 for $1, not bad, lol
llanwydd: so the balmoral hotel is real
Bambi: so indirectly seagrams is NOW owned by the same company as canada dry ... pepsico lol
cease: for 69 it was standard price
cease: ah, i see bambi
Bambi: I used to drink no beer, and now.... I still drink no beer lol
ah,clem: got really sick on seagrams 7 in high school, can't stand the smell of it to this day
cease: very Noh
llanwydd: I used to love canada dry in the days very long ago when I drank anything besides diet soft drinks
cease: never liked whiskey.
cease: but canada dry is a decent ginger ale
cease: vernors was the best.
llanwydd: I liked vernors too but I came by it very rarely
||||||||| Catherwood steals into the room, and snorts derisively "Announcing 'GroovyTweeny', also known as 'Nancy' -- the time is 9:24 PM" -- then he slowly retires back into the Aviary...
GroovyTweeny: Recently returned from Regrooving
llanwydd: Hey Tween!
cease: the dryness of canada dry is very rfefreshing. the strenght of vernors was in its taste, like somre sort of wood.
ah,clem: hi Tween
cease: hie tween
GroovyTweeny: Bon soir, madames et monsieurs
cease: the best cidres i've ha din franc,e from normandy, occaionally i've sen for sale in the states but not here, are more like Vernors
cease: very strong apple flavour, but not sweet
GroovyTweeny: You guys have been getting unusually hot weatther in your sector, haven't you cease?
cease: where as bc apples make a fine dry cidre. butnot enough
cease: it is riidiculous, tgween. i mighht as well be in texas
llanwydd: yeah vernors seemed to have a very carefully crafted recipe
cease: yesterday was the hottest it's ever been here, an today is hotter
GroovyTweeny: That's what I heard. Around 100 in the NW is a bit unusual
cease: ice cubes are our friends
llanwydd: I heard you guys are really getting baked, cat
cease: and not in a good way, llan
llanwydd: we had a hot day in my neck of the woods and I spent part of the afternoon swimming
llanwydd: I hope you have good a/c
cease: i went to the gym to lift weights. wonderful air conditioning
GroovyTweeny: At this point, no problems with large chunks of the Antartic around the Victoria area as far as you're concered, eh?
llanwydd: I ought to get a gym membership. I used to have one
GroovyTweeny: Arctic
cease: drove my air conditioned car 5 blcoks to gym, sweated for a few yards, then into a cool gym. mmm
GroovyTweeny: Jim doesn't require you to have a membership, Llan
||||||||| It's 9:30 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| llanwyd - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Bambi: hey Tween
GroovyTweeny: Hi Bambi
Bambi: was down getting more water ... ran out...had some yummy homemade salsa and tostitos
llanwydd: but the gym in ticonderoga closed a few years ago and they knocked down the building
llanwydd: I've made my own salsa before
cease: bambi, you must get a lot of hot weather.
llanwydd: I acquired some tomatillos and I just had to try it
ah,clem: pick up the bricks and put it back together, you will get all the exercise you need...
llanwydd: there's an idea, clem
Bambi: lol
Bambi: and it's cheaper than a gym membership too
||||||||| Catherwood enters with Principalpoop close behind, grumbles something about disrupting his 9:33 PM tree-stunting plans, and runs off to the vestibule.
cease: i se them in stores. what do they taste like?
Bambi: hey princep
Principalpoop: hehe she said tostitos hehe
cease: pooperino
llanwydd: they taste a lot like green tomatoes
ah,clem: lol
llanwydd: Hey Princi!
Principalpoop: what is the rod?
Bambi: yeah, likely spelled it incorrectly too princep lol
Principalpoop: hi ahh, clem
ah,clem: hi Mr. Principal
GroovyTweeny: Why, Mr. Serling, of course...
Bambi: or maybe they were baked tortillas who knows lol
cease: thats what they look like, llan
llanwydd: it's what you spare to spoil the child
cease: the heirloom tomatos are coming in now.
llanwydd: or so I hear
Principalpoop: i liked tormato, it was an ok album
Principalpoop: you threw a spare? congrats llan
llanwydd: tormato disappointed me
GroovyTweeny: It had it moments, P. "future Times Rejoice" is one of my all-time fav Yes tunes
llanwydd: the last song is a masterpiece, though
Principalpoop: that is the general opinion, it was ok I thought
GroovyTweeny: I need to revisit the album
Principalpoop: i have not heard it in years
llanwydd: I was all excited about it though when I got my illegal copy before it hit the stores
llanwydd: yeah, future times is great too
Principalpoop: don't let me interrupt, tell us more about your tostitas bambi
Principalpoop: i forget which album, they were going for the one
GroovyTweeny: Llan - check out my Roadkill Show #9 at: http://kurtericson.com/txroadkill/roadkillshow/
GroovyTweeny: Opens with Future Times
llanwydd: I'll look at that. brb
llanwydd: just got the pop up audio. cool
llanwydd: that's how it works with msntv2
Principalpoop: awesome
llanwydd: wmp
Principalpoop: rivah
llanwydd: I caught the tormato tour just the day before I started my senior year of hs as I remember
Principalpoop: i have no idea when it came out, i was drinking and smoking heavily, maybe that is why I liked it
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 9:43 PM and Bunnyboy steps out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
Bunnyboy: Yessssss...
Principalpoop: hip hop bunnyboy
Principalpoop: beat the reaper
cease: hip hip
Principalpoop: the plague, the plague
GroovyTweeny: Hey Bun
cease: or as they say in slovakia, "the prague! the prague!"
llanwydd: damn msn is really giving me the business tonight
Principalpoop: move llan hehe
llanwydd: plague's got the streets all tied up
GroovyTweeny: One of these days, you have to get a 'real' computer, Llan ;)
GroovyTweeny recommends a cheep old Mac from ebay
cease: i didnt know the streets were into s&m
Bambi: been playing the backup shell game tonight
Principalpoop: shields and mclaughlin?
GroovyTweeny: The streets are full of Thai restaurants
Bunnyboy: Mantras and Chakras. ZZZZZZzzzzzz.....
llanwydd: doctec offered me a computer for the cost of postage a couple of years ago but I haven't heard from him since
GroovyTweeny: Shileds & McLaughlin lol - not bad, P
Principalpoop: I use explorer, i hear there are better shells, but have not fooled with them
llanwydd: I'd like to go to a doctor sometime and tell him my chakras hurt
llanwydd: that would be especially funny if it was an indian doctor
GroovyTweeny: You can get something that'll run OS X on eBay for $100-$200
Principalpoop: I strained my chakras
Bambi: lol princep
Principalpoop: and then put them in the sun to dry
Merlyn: O Fortuna misheard lyrics: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpAzvKt_8lk
cease: im just reading a bio of lennon. his interactinos with the maharishi were not so merry
GroovyTweeny: It'll only run OS X on eBay, though (Tweeny remembers his grammar classes)
cease: bu ti rmeember how suddenly it was all guru all the time
cease: the flavour of the year
GroovyTweeny: Really, the black sheep of the Beatles TM crowd?
llanwydd: I hope you're not reading the goldman book, cat
cease: nono the good one
cease: newish
llanwydd: that book is mostly lies
cease: by philip norman
cease: so i hear, llan
Bambi: fortunato ... I remember Fortunato and the mildewey wine cellars ....
Bunnyboy: Ali Ali Infri. Precursor to the Open Pyramid.
llanwydd: I read the one by goldman when it came out but I knew better than to believe it
Bunnyboy: "Why is there no plot?"
Principalpoop: hi ahh, clem
llanwydd: "For the love of God, Montressor!"
ah,clem: ;)
Principalpoop: power?
Principalpoop: lennon did not look newish
Principalpoop: oh maybe he did
ah,clem: see firesigntheatre.com
cease: didnt live lnog enough to look oldish
llanwydd: I don't know. I think he looked older at 40 than I do at 47
Principalpoop: only paul and ringo left, i am out of the lottery
||||||||| Catherwood walks up and pipes up "Presenting 'Elayne', just granted probation at 9:55 PM", then leaves hurriedly.
llanwydd: do any of you remember where you were and what you were doing when lennon was shot?
Elayne: Evenin' all!
cease: harrison looked old when he was young
Principalpoop: Hi E
llanwydd: Hi Elayne!
cease: hey el
Elayne: I do, Llan.
Principalpoop: yes I do llan
cease: is it as hot in nyc as it is here, el?
Elayne: Oh, are we talking Beatles tonight? Maybe I should get Robin to log on...
llanwydd: I was in bed asleep
Elayne: It's been very...soupy, Cat.
cease: yesterday was our hottest day ever. today is hotter
Bunnyboy: hi El!
cease: i'm lving on ice cubes
Bunnyboy: Elayne: Just caught up on a year's worth of JUSTICE SOCIETY.
Elayne: Good for you, Bunnyboy. I still have some catching up to do there.
llanwydd: I'm living on welfare
llanwydd: just kidding
Bunnyboy: The new JSA team starting things with a bang.
Principalpoop: nothing wrong with welfare llan
Bunnyboy: Is that Edie MacLurg, on the CNI feed?
llanwydd: I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it
Principalpoop: just keep you cadillac clean and no fur boas
llanwydd: I ended up on it many years ago
Principalpoop: not that is anything wrong with that hehe
cease: shes on this, bunny
Bunnyboy: I only have about a half-dozen 2 foot stacks of back issues to get through...
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 10 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
GroovyTweeny: Well, this has to be an all-time record for the Dendron Teleporter. Nino has clem & Bambi at: Amioun, Liban-Nord, Lebanon
Elayne: I have 3 boxes' worth myself, Bunnyboy.
Bambi: hi Elayne
Bunnyboy: Working through BLACK DOSSIER, soon to be followed by the 1910 LOEG piece.
Bambi :-)
Bunnyboy: Damned 4 point type!
Bambi: hey Bunny
Elayne: Hey Bambi!
llanwydd: so when is the firesign theatre going back in the studio?
Bambi: yeah, we sure get around lol
Bunnyboy: Next big wade: a year's worth of 3 Avengers titles.
Bunnyboy: yo Bambi!
llanwydd: not familiar with 3 Avengers
cease: theyre going on stage in october
Bunnyboy: The only Avengers title I'm current on is DARK AVENGERS.
llanwydd: cool! where?
Bambi: so how has everyone been this past week? I was on the other side of the KVM working on ccomputers
GroovyTweeny: We've been asking that for how many years, LL?
Bunnyboy: llan: It's three iterations of The Avengers...the Marvel books, not Steed and Peel.
llanwydd: aha
Bunnyboy: The did the "X" treatment to The Avengers, a few years back.
Principalpoop: i remember when DC jumped the shark with new age heroes, i forget how what worked out
llanwydd: I've been great, bambi. in the middle of my fast so I can look appropriate for the big film shoot next tuesday
llanwydd: I've had 300 calories or less since monday night
Bambi: break a leg llan!
llanwydd: probably nothing but water tomorrow
llanwydd: thanks, bambi
GroovyTweeny: Yes, best of luck, Llan :-)
cease: best luck with the shoot, llan
llanwydd: there is a healthy way to do that. eat 9 ounces of protein a day. plus water. nothing else
Principalpoop: don't collapse during the shoot my goodness
cease: you'll knock em dead
llanwydd: no, I've done this before
Bunnyboy: And a stuffed cabbage.
Elayne: Take care of your health, Llan.
llanwydd: they are paying me double what they originally offered because they want me to play yet another role
Merlyn: break a leg llan
llanwydd: I'll be an interpreter for gorbachev
Merlyn: I might be back later, going for a bit
||||||||| Merlyn leaves to catch the 10:08 PM train to Minneapolis.
llanwydd: thanks for the well wishes everybody
Principalpoop: ok M
llanwydd: this film has been in production for a year and it should be release early in 2010
llanwydd: realeased
llanwydd: oh, what the
Principalpoop: re-released?
llanwydd: that too
Bunnyboy: Hunger has robbed him of his typing ablittiy.
Elayne: "Please release it, let it go..."
Bambi: night Merl
Bunnyboy: Oh, damn! Me, too!
Principalpoop: the britney littney
GroovyTweeny: Somebody speared britney's bloated body?
GroovyTweeny: Was that before or after the monitor lizards got to her?
Principalpoop: gila
llanwydd: I'll bet she is a direct descendent of shakespeare and one of them shortened the name
cease: this owuld be ver funny as a cartoon
llanwydd: or it got changed when the shakespeares got to ellis island
GroovyTweeny: Ah, the havana gila hebrew lizards
Principalpoop: something to shake a spear at
GroovyTweeny: from cuba lol
Principalpoop: and a panama hat
llanwydd: a necktie and a panama hat
llanwydd: she looks nothing like that
GroovyTweeny: Astrud and Gilberto Sullivan sing the Pirates of Ipenima
Elayne is turning in again...
llanwydd: LOL
Elayne: Next week, all.
||||||||| Elayne departs at 10:16 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
Principalpoop: the girl from Ipenima she walks and when she walks olala la la
cease: excelent, tween
Principalpoop: ciao E
cease: by el
GroovyTweeny bows
Principalpoop: bow bow
Principalpoop: bobo and bowbow, a musical trio
llanwydd: where's dex tonight?
Bambi: g'night Elayne
Principalpoop: with amber, he is amberdextrous
Bambi: not sure; don't think he mentioned being away tonight; hope all is well
cease: yes he said last week he may be absent tonight
Bambi: good question; drat, we could have asked Elayne but didn't think of it
Bambi: ah, ok .. .thanks Cat
Principalpoop: going to new jersey again so soon?
llanwydd: amber? do we know her?
cease: indeed
Bambi: must have missed that
Principalpoop: no llan, just a name to fit in ambidextrous
llanwydd: aha
Principalpoop: i considered umber
Principalpoop: but that is an old word
llanwydd: he would have taken umbrage
Bunnyboy: I've been burnt by Umber before.
Bambi: my Dad was ambidextrous literally not just a little bit; fully ambidextrous
Bunnyboy: I took umberage!
Principalpoop: cool
llanwydd: I guess that is something you have to acquire at an early age
Principalpoop: my sister is a leftie, we tormented her no end
Principalpoop: the teachers tried to force her to use the right, I don't think they do that anymore
llanwydd: I'm a southpaw myself
Principalpoop: Sinister
cease: thats better than being a southpark
Bambi: I talked about that a little bit on my blog's category about my Dad: http://bambismusings.wordpress.com/category/daddyloving-memory/
llanwydd: they say if you are lefthanded you use the right side of your brain more than the left
Bambi: raining again here
Bambi: and a bit windy too
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 10:27 PM and H. Stones sashays out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
cease: hey stones
H. Stones: Hi there folks
llanwydd: Good evening, Stones!
Principalpoop: look it is stones
cease: funny crack joke
Principalpoop: good evening your highness
H. Stones: Stones it is
H. Stones: still wrestling with builders and decorating so computer offline most of the time
cease: how are things in the uk?
Principalpoop: same here bambi
Bunnyboy: Cheers, Stones!
Bambi: hey Stones! long time no see!
H. Stones: no see cos no time
Bambi: how's Honey doing?
Principalpoop: http://www.oneandother.co.uk/
H. Stones: she is surviving but its not easy for her
H. Stones: she is still living near Cerro high in the rockies
Principalpoop: cool plinthe
Principalpoop: i see her on msn sometimes, nice
cease: terrible news, stones
cease: we wish her all possible health
H. Stones: i will relay the message
Bambi: she moved from NM?
H. Stones: she tried satellite links for broadband but they were all pants and she could not even do audio without it cracking up all the time
Bambi: does she still have her phone? or just on msn these days?
llanwydd: would you refresh my memory? what is honey's health problem?
H. Stones: she still has her cellphone
Bambi: thanks Clem !! :-)
GroovyTweeny: Thanks much, Mr. Clem :-)
Bambi: great show as always!
Principalpoop: Cerro Torre is one of the mountains of the Southern Patagonian Ice Field
H. Stones: she is diabetic and has blood pressure and clotting problems and at that altitude, a tendency to get pneumonia
Principalpoop: poor thing
GroovyTweeny: Have a great week folks, and don't forget to support CNI Radio, without which, none of this would have been necessary...
||||||||| Around 10:33 PM, GroovyTweeny walks off into the sunset...
cease: indeed tween
Principalpoop: oops night tween
Bambi: that is so sad; wish she had a better place to be :-(
cease: ah, the clem voice
Bambi: g'night Tween
llanwydd: that's bad. I wonder if she has thought of moving
ah,clem: good night everyone
Principalpoop: thanks keepers of the root, super week
cease: all the best, clem
H. Stones: a couple of years back she was sitting pretty, her own little house in Alburquerque left by her father and even a small allowance but he died and unbelievably wicked stepmother grabbed the house and the allowance and threw her out
Principalpoop: toad away
Bambi: in this economy, sometimes it's all one can do to maintain with no changes
llanwydd: I'm not being flippant. I really don't know what is going on with her
cease: a bad fairy tale, stones
H. Stones: yes it is, cease
||||||||| ah,clem leaves at 10:35 PM, singing "Oh, I'm just a little fishy, floating in the sea, and there ain't no hook that's smart enough to catch the likes of me..."
llanwydd: how is that possible to take what has been left to her as an inheritance?
Bambi: yes, very bad nightmare ... her dad must be spinning in his grave ...
cease: can she be helped in real life?
H. Stones: now she lives in a place i call Stamp Toilet because the nearest post office which sells only stamps is the size of a toilet
H. Stones: i dont know precisely llan but she is in NM and wicked stepmonster is in CA, two sets of lawhers would be required to contest anything and stepmonster knows Honey has no dosh to fight with
Bunnyboy: nite clem!
H. Stones: nighty night clem
cease: power more appropriate than ever
Bambi: will keep Honey in thoughts and prayers ... wish I could do more but times are tough all over :-(
Principalpoop: i know some guys from the navy who would take care of the stepmother for 5 dollars
Principalpoop: i would have to locate them again
H. Stones: nice thought PP, hopefully the laws of Karma will do the trick
cease: maybve just saying that here would discourabe that from happening, poop
Principalpoop: we are karmas hands, or something like that
H. Stones: If stepmonster croaks, Honey can get her house back because the estate will be split
Bambi: let's hope so Stones, let's hope so
H. Stones: yes indeed, Bambi
H. Stones: how is the Clemster now Bambie ?
Bambi: karma can be powerful thing
Bambi: he is still struggling with health as well
llanwydd: karma is only cause and effect
H. Stones: well llan, i know the effect i would like to cause
Bambi: yes, a very powerful thing
Principalpoop: courage, everybody!
Bambi: doesn't always get fixed in time; but what goes around comes around
llanwydd: well, cause and effect can be very complicated
Bambi: that wicked woman will get hers
H. Stones: judging from the karma that honey has suffered she must have been Mrs Vlad the Impaler in a previous life
llanwydd: the lawyers too, I hope
Bambi: although, unfortunately, Honey isn't the first or last to lose to supposed family
Bunnyboy: They always do.
Bambi: it's happened twice in my lifetime on my Dad's side of the family
Principalpoop: don't get me started bambi
H. Stones: what amazes me is that some people are just never satisfied with what they have
cease: people die, but not because of what they did in life
Bambi: Clem's family same thing at least once within his lifetime
Principalpoop: get my blood pressure just thinking about it again
Bunnyboy: It's food I need...stat! Take care, alla ya!
Bambi: and maybe a second time now that his Dad has passed away
Principalpoop: bon ap hip hop
llanwydd: Nite BB
cease: eqat well, bun
Bambi: night Bunny
H. Stones: i had the same shit when my mother died, my sister grabbed everything at the first opportunity
cease: does such greed manifest itself before, so one would be warned of such?
Bambi: more people are ripped off by family than by strangers it seems
||||||||| Around 10:45 PM, Bunnyboy walks off into the sunset...
Bambi: and not because they hate their relatives but because they are greedy b*stards
H. Stones: yes, Bambi, as they say, You can choose your friends but you are stuck with your family
Bambi: lol how true Stones
Principalpoop: i was sandbagged by the level of greed cease
||||||||| Catherwood walks up and pipes up "Presenting 'Merlyn', just granted probation at 10:46 PM", then leaves hurriedly.
Principalpoop: wb M
Merlyn: hey
H. Stones: they also say that Blood is thicker than water but i cannot think of anything thicker than my sister
Bambi: wb Merl
cease: i wonder if that sociopathic, predatory gene is what has kept homo sapiens from losing out to neanderthals, wolves, etc
cease: hey merl
Bambi: you too princep? amazing how many of us have had that happen
cease: you just saved us from pathology
llanwydd: the first job I had back in 1976 my mother made me put all my earnings in a joint account with her and years later she wouldn't let me take out the money unless I gave her nearly half and she shared it with my father because he intimidated me into giving it to her
H. Stones: i begin to realise why some people lose it and start shooting at people randomly
llanwydd: she knew what she was planning all along
Principalpoop: being selfish is ok, even necessary, but there are limits
cease: wow, llan
cease: indeed stones
llanwydd: they did worse than that
llanwydd: I rarely speak to them
cease: somnetihg rd laing said always impressed me, the reason there are are so many disturbed people is that there are so many disturbing families
Bambi: sheesh llan
H. Stones: the last time i saw or spoke to anyone from my family was 11 years back on the day of my mother funeral
cease: just justifying, poop. just speculating.
cease: thats a long time, stones
cease: i meant not justifying.
H. Stones: as i said, we choose our friends and eventually, friends become the family we always wished for,
Principalpoop: i bet the greedy folks are in another chat, talking about what naive meek relatives they have lol
cease: good point, stones
H. Stones: thats why i come back here,
cease: we do the best we can
cease: lol poop
cease: i think that's true
cease: carl rove and his pals
H. Stones: dont you mean another Twat Room, Poop ?
Principalpoop: yessir
cease: any fienews, merl?
Bambi: the Meek shall inherit the earth
Merlyn: nothing yet cat
llanwydd: anyone see any great movies lately?
Bambi: there will be a payback of sorts
Principalpoop: i will be too angry to talk if I think about it...so I move along
cease: we rly on planet proctor for news
H. Stones: i have to say at this poine that in the five or six years i have been coming in here, i have never experienced any unpleasantness or bad vibes from anyone and other than some deliberate windups things have never become difficult
llanwydd: planet proctor is cool
Principalpoop: up yours stones
cease: bambi, it aint happened yet and i'm not optimistic about the future
Bambi: LOL
||||||||| 10:53 PM: wake (the flake) jumps out of the hall closet saying "I've been listening to all of you talking about me for the past hour!"
Principalpoop: hi wake
llanwydd: Hey Wake!
cease: we are on your side stones.
cease: hey wake
H. Stones: You bastard Poop, i know where you live
llanwydd: that is unique about us, stones
wake (the flake): And it's ALL LIES!!!!
cease: the few of us who know firesign theatre should celebrate that fact
Principalpoop: you english so and so, and your queen too
Bambi: hey wake
cease: thats good for golfers, wake
cease: but not so good for gulfs
wake (the flake): hmmmmm
cease: how are things in thailand?
cease: it is as hot as thailand here today
llanwydd: thai one on lately?
wake (the flake): no update?
Merlyn: toyland?
||||||||| "10:55 PM? I'm late!" exclaims wake (the flake), who then dashes out through the french doors and down through the flowerbeds.
cease: on what?
Principalpoop: this is home on the range, where seldom is heard, a discouraging word
H. Stones: In England, July to August is the height of the Monsoon Season
Principalpoop: and the clouds are not cloudy all day
||||||||| Catherwood enters with wake (the flake) close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 10:55 PM tree-stunting plans, and hurries off to the vestibule.
cease: it feels like we're on a range here
Principalpoop: wb wake
cease: yesterday was our hottest day ever, and today is hotter
llanwydd: not when I was there, stones
cease: ever in human terms of course
llanwydd: remember 1984?
Principalpoop: broil cease and then serve immediately with salso and tostitos
cease: at one pont, all was molten
Bambi: in August usually here too for the monsoon, or the drought season lol
cease: no mexican destiny for me
H. Stones: it was hotter than Heater in Hooker today and hotter than Hooker in Helmouth
wake (the flake): can't see any conversation BRB
||||||||| wake (the flake) departs at 10:57 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
Principalpoop: update your firefox, oops
cease: i grew up in hellish la. this is like that
||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and wake (the flake) gets out at 10:58 PM.
Principalpoop: http://www.oneandother.co.uk/ did you see that stones?
wake (the flake): let's see now
Principalpoop: make sure your browser is updated wake
llanwydd: I was hoping to see england's "green and pleasant land" when I went there in 1984 but the grass was all brown because of the drought
H. Stones: Bill Hicks said that LA was perfect for lizards
Principalpoop: working?
Bambi: already got my FF updates a few days ago or last week lol
llanwydd: it was pleasant nonetheless
Principalpoop: exactly bambi, if he did not have auto update...
wake (the flake): yeah I was trying to use my new "portable FireFox" browser here at work
H. Stones: llan, as long as you avoid our bigger cities, the weather is always usually bearable
cease: the firesign said something like that on an hour hour show, stones
Principalpoop: the weather is crazy all over the planet
Bambi: yep, just do a search on strange weather and you will see a ton of it
llanwydd: I was in three major cities, london, bristol and gloucester
Principalpoop: too hot, too cool, too dry, too wet, no telling what is going on
llanwydd: I found all of them rather exciting
wake (the flake): the screen just froze
H. Stones: 1976 was our worst summer with smogs and temperatures hovering around 100 in the big towns
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 11 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
cease: froze, my favourite word
Principalpoop: freeze your frozies that will be fierce
Merlyn: http://www.firesigntheatre.com/bvhtml/paper/paper5.html
cease: re:joyce
cease: we have no choys
wake (the flake): frosty frozen fruzeglaza
cease: excellent, merl
cease: captures the vacationosity of the name
Principalpoop: i found the secret recipe for KFC chicken on the net, is nothing sacred?
llanwydd: I saw the secret recipe for coca-cola somewhere
cease: i'm thinkibng dali joins gleason in miami, with ricky on congas and lucy on lubricatrion
Principalpoop: i have seen that too
llanwydd: or what "purported" to be the real recipe
H. Stones: merlyn, some of the guys from KFAI are doing a music dubmix for our local BBC station
cease: you still thriving on radio, stones?
llanwydd: well, I'm heading out. see you next time as always
H. Stones: its a program called On the Wire that i occasionally contribute too and its the programs 25th birthday on Sept 19th
Merlyn: I didn't know that, stones
Bambi: great to see you all but I really need to get some sleep
H. Stones: KFAI have played quite a lot of the music i have sent them
H. Stones: OK Bambi, sweet dreams
Bambi: can't believe you are still hanging in there Stones! Very good for as late as it is there!
Principalpoop: night night sweet deer, courage
Bambi: sweet dreams to you too Stones and to everyone :-)
H. Stones: i have just been talking to my friend in Beijing and you wouldnt believe how late it is there
wake (the flake): Part of the KFC "secret" is the high pressure cooking method they use.
Bambi: thanks princep ... keep us in your thoughts and prayers
cease: sleep well, bambi
Bambi: nytol and I will do the same
Principalpoop ) yeppers
||||||||| Bambi is defenestrated just as the clock strikes 11:07 PM.
cease: lol stones
Principalpoop: yes wake
Principalpoop: and 2 tablespoons of MSG hehe
wake (the flake): so enen if you have the 14 herbs and spices, it's still pretty hard to duplicate them.
Principalpoop: i like the grilled now anyway
wake (the flake): send me the spices Herb.
H. Stones: talking of herbs and spices you can still catch me on one of my Blogs at http://justaswethought.blogspot.com/
Principalpoop: send me some herbs spice
cease: berautiful northern lights, stones
Principalpoop: i saw that the other day, the idea that marijuana cures cancer is dubious, maybe 1 or 2 kinds of cancer, maybe
cease: seen em a few times, always a delight
H. Stones: i think it works on some of the depression and reduced appettite, Poop
Merlyn: do the spice girls count at 5 of the 14 herbs and spices?
cease: i thikn more a qaulity of life issue, poop
cease: only to 4, merlhead
Principalpoop: i don't want to bicker, claiming it cures cancer is not helpful I think...
cease: i thought cheerois cured cancer, poop
Principalpoop: no, that is heart disease, and colon polyps
H. Stones: i thought they caused it, cease
Merlyn: the herbs could be alpert, tarlek, etc
H. Stones: Colon Polyps, wasnt he a general in the Desert Storm shindig ?
Principalpoop: is the tijuana brass still around?
cease: i dont think we know what causes what, in this polluted environment we live in
cease: we may well ahve poisoned ourselves and every life form larger than cockroaches
cease: only in memory, poop. but a good memory
H. Stones: true cease but i think we are all getting way too much fluoride and that kills just about anything
Principalpoop: them too, but they can thrive on it
cease: yes stones, the toxins are legion, and recongregating in virus-like ways
wake (the flake): I bookmarked that site so I can check it out later.
H. Stones: a veritable toxic cocktail
Principalpoop: i like the hormones that make the poor cows discharge twice as much milk as usual, that cannot be good for them
cease: there is a lot of that shit around, poop
Principalpoop: yes, anything to make more profit, anything.....
wake (the flake): Usually the farmers are complaining about too much milk
H. Stones: always good to see you guys but i have much to do tomorrow and guests are expected as well so i better call it quits for now
Principalpoop: yes, i remember reading about potatos
wake (the flake): It drives the price down
cease: all the best to you and honey, stones
Principalpoop: night stones, glad you are doing ok, best to you and honey your highness
H. Stones: thanks cease, take care all and have a good week
Principalpoop: you english bastard you hehe
||||||||| It's 11:20 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| llanwydd - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
cease: honey your highness, i bet a lot of bees say that
Principalpoop: night llan
wake (the flake): bye bye
H. Stones: Poop you are a colonial oik
Principalpoop: ouch
wake (the flake): oik?
wake (the flake): I wopuldn't stand for that PP
H. Stones: a bit like a chav but worse
wake (the flake): So remain seated.
Principalpoop: oh yeah? well, same to you, smart guy...
wake (the flake): I will check your page out later Stones
Principalpoop: i will go too, friend from sweden is checking in before he goes to work, have a super week
||||||||| Principalpoop departs at 11:22 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
Merlyn: bye pp
wake (the flake): I gotta run too. Duty calls. And not Howdie Doodie either.
cease: off we fly
||||||||| cease departs at 11:23 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
wake (the flake): bye all!
||||||||| wake (the flake) rushes off, saying "11:24 PM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?"
H. Stones: TTFN Merlyn
Merlyn: bye wake, stones
||||||||| 11:26 PM -- Merlyn left for parts unknown.   (Entry from Nick Danger's "Idiots I Have Been Paid To Follow").
||||||||| Bightrethighrehighre steals in around 11:39 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last week's "unpleasant incident."
Bightrethighrehighre: what?
||||||||| It's 11:40 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| H. Stones - dead from jaundice
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Bightrethighrehighre: almost no chat tonight?
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 11:41 PM and Merlyn waltzes out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
Merlyn: you missed it
||||||||| "Hey Merlyn!" ... Merlyn turns, and sees Bradshaw approching with the handcuffs, and is dragged away, screaming "it's only 11:42 PM, I don't have to go yet!"...
||||||||| It's 11:50 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Bightrethighrehighre - dead from the fiddlers
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Catherwood escorts RedPillTweeny in through the front door at 12:26 AM, picks up his cues (only slightly scorched), and heads for the billiard room.
||||||||| It's 12:40 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| RedPillTweeny - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Catherwood enters, and announces to all and sundry "It's 4:32 AM, time to change the log file and clean out unused rooms; please exit the chat room for a minute or two. Thank you for your patience."

The Evening's Participants:
H. Stones
Vampin de Lectrician
wake (the flake)
URL References:

Rogue's Gallery:

cat_pp.jpg (5168 bytes)
PP and Cat(cease)

newbunny.jpg (4426 bytes)

capeken.jpg (7639 bytes)
kend^/Dr. Headphones

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Merlyn and Tirebiter

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freq.jpg (4441 bytes)

roto.jpg (6046 bytes)

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LeatherG & SO

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ahclem+Bambi.jpg (9500 bytes)
Ah, Clem and Bambi

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Compañero Señor Yämamoto

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Dexter Fong

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Bubba's Brain.jpg (6600 bytes)
Bubba's Brain

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boney.jpg (20600 bytes)

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Bob D Caterino

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Dave & Katie

capeklok.jpg (5469 bytes)
404 - Not Found, Not Forgotten

peggy.jpg (5240 bytes)
Peggy Blisswhips

audrey.jpg (4873 bytes)
Audrey Farber

tdt.jpg (6077 bytes)
Tiny Dr. Tim
Rest In Peace, Dear Friend

And, "The Home Team"