||||||||| Catherwood re-enters the Waiting Room and explains "This is the main discussion room which is logged each night." ||||||||| Catherwood announces, "The time is 4:33 AM - I now declare Thursday's chat log for July 01, 2010 officially open!"... and then, he retires back to the vestibule... ||||||||| CrispyFired enters at 6:01 AM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and hurries off to the Chapeau Manger. CrispyFired:
The thick veil of pain lifted
enough for me to eyeball the situation
Rococo, that sleazy weasel, how did he get in here?
And what was he doing with that pickle in one hand and my contract in the other?
I had no choice . Nancy and the old Butler were frozen with terror.
I struggled quitly to my feet and flung myself headfirst at Rococos stomach! CrispyFired:
I felt like I was being kicked
I the head by the whole chorus line at Minskys.
So Nancy was in on this caper!
I felt myself going under.
The biggest long shot Louie at Hialeah wouldnt put a fin on my fate now!
This time, something told me
I was out for lunch.
I even began to hear things . . . CrispyFired:
It aint no use
if you aint got a boost!
The boost you get from Loostners!
The All-Weather Breakfast! CrispyFired:
Ladies and gentlemen
- we interrupt this regarly scheduled broadcast to bring you a message of national importance from the White House in Washington, D. C.
Ladies and Gentlemen . . .
Ladies and Gentlemen: the President of the United States . . .
The makers of Loostners Castor Oil Flakes and Fantastic Cigarettes
-- Loostners for the Smile of Beauty, Fantastics for the Smile of Success
-- have brought you the transcibed adventure of Nick Danger, Third Eye!
Tune in again next week
-- same time, same station
-- when Nick Danger meets
The Arab! ||||||||| CrispyFired leaves at 6:03 AM, singing "Oh, I'm just a little fishy, floating in the sea, and there ain't no hook that's smart enough to catch the likes of me..." ||||||||| 8:24 PM: ah,clem jumps out of the hall closet saying "I've been listening to all of you talking about me for the past five minutes!" ||||||||| New CNI streaming notice: '"a few minutes with FireSign Theatre" at about 9 eastern' ||||||||| 8:25 PM -- ah,clem left for parts unknown.(Entry from Nick Danger's "Idiots I Have Been Paid To Follow"). ||||||||| Catherwood stumbles in and intones "Presenting 'Woody 1', just granted probation at 8:47 PM", then leaves hurriedly. Woody 1: too early aye? firehead's ain't sparkin' yet, aye? Hello friends. Goodbye friends til later. Woody 1: What's with this new board? Weird!!! ||||||||| At 8:51 PM, Woody 1 rushes out the door saying "Hey, mister ice-cream man, I've got a nickel, wait for meeeee..." ||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and Dexter Fong gets out at 8:55 PM. Dexter Fong: Oh new news, all of it bad....No mention of Dexter Fong by Friebroiled Dexter Fong: Firebroiled Dexter Fong: How am I to be making amends Dexter Fong: Shall I genuflect, genuflect, genuflect? Dexter Fong: Am I about to be making full confession and speedy atonement? Dexter Fong: Can I rend toney high-fashion garments? Dexter Fong: Ooohhhh! Not to be torturing myself Dexter Fong: Only one solution, and it's not the one I wanted Dexter Fong: Must eradicate all Firebroiled's post Dexter Fong: go away firebroiled Dexter Fong: go away firebroiled ||||||||| Catherwood strides in with a trumpet, plays a fanfare, and proclaims "Nine PM on Thursday, July 01, 2010 - I now declare alt.comedy.firesgn-thtre's chat officially open!" Dexter Fong: go away firebroiled Dexter Fong: Come back next week same time, same high definition time Dexter Fong: That I am Clem ||||||||| Catherwood stomps in at 9:03 PM, dragging cease by the hair and asks "Can anyone vouch for this yo-yo?" Dexter Fong: having a bad hair day Cat? ||||||||| Catherwood accompanies ah,clem into the room, accepts a grimy quarter as a gratuity, mutters something about 9:03 PM, then departs. ah,clem: hi cease: no, i'm going out for dinner with friends in a few minutes Dexter Fong: Hi clem cease: ah, the clem voice Dexter Fong: A fine dining experienc Cat? ||||||||| H. Stones enters at 9:05 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and hurries off to the Haberdashery Barn. Dexter Fong: High stones H. Stones: Greetings Sir Fong cease: it sounds like rfo is ending Dexter Fong: Dash it all, Stones...I told you to drop the "Sire" in public Dexter Fong: er uh "Sir" H. Stones: Hi also to Clem, Cease and any lurkers
Dexter Fong wonders if Sire is a predeccesor of Sir cease: the fish restaurant i reviewed on my blog recently. great fish H. Stones: yes i think it is ah,clem: good evening Mr. Stones ||||||||| A time machine materializes at 9:07 PM and Desert Sage Honey waltzes out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece. Dexter Fong: Lorde! I was right H. Stones: Hi Honeybunch Desert Sage Honey: hello hello hello ah,clem: Hola Dexter Fong: Hi Honey Desert Sage Honey: Hola ya'll cease: hi honey and stones H. Stones: this must be the best mime room on the net Dexter Fong: Achtung Minen geblowup
Desert Sage Honey checks to see if her slip is showing or she is exposing her self in some unseemely manner that halts all conversation Dexter Fong: It's all about you isn't DS Dexter Fong: isn't it Desert Sage Honey: well uh of course it is H. Stones: yes, most Dexterous of Fongs Dexter Fong: Just checking Desert Sage Honey: heehee Dexter Fong: TO see if I was still on message Desert Sage Honey: I hope you are all well hale & hearty this fine evening Dexter Fong: Feeling all right...nicely temperate low humidity July 1 here in NYC H. Stones: i think they are all watching TV H. Stones: or Not TV Dexter Fong: What's on? Dexter Fong: tap tap tap ah,clem: nice temps in SE Va, as well Dex, and about time too H. Stones: nothing much on account of the hot weather cease: surprisingly cold today in Van Dexter Fong: There's no such thing as *surprisingly cold* in VC Dexter Fong: I see the weather maps cease: for july?
Desert Sage Honey is watching the day the sky exploded black n white SF circa 1958 H. Stones: or indeed surprisingly anythng cease: my visitors from Portland and Sydney wondered if this was our winter Dexter Fong: low 60's with a promise of rain Desert Sage Honey: that sounds great for New York City this time of year
Dexter Fong gives DS a questioning look Dexter Fong: You mean "low 60's etc"
Desert Sage Honey huh Dexter Fong: ? Desert Sage Honey: ahhhhhhh yeah Dexter Fong: well we spent about 3 weeks in the low-mid 80's to mid 90's with humidity so I guess low 60's with etc might sound great Dexter Fong: bit much of an overcompensation though Desert Sage Honey: indeed for this time of year
Desert Sage Honey sings hot time summer in the city back o my neck gettin dirty n gritty H. Stones: its raining steadily here, you may be surprised to hear ah,clem: last week we were at 99, so low 80's are quiter nice for a high Dexter Fong: It *has* been a lot of weather thru out the country this spring/summer ah,clem: quite nece Dexter Fong: quice nace ah,clem: quite nice Dexter Fong: It's nice cease: people wondering here if we'll ever have summer H. Stones: quate Dexter Fong: 2B nice ah,clem: I'll try Desert Sage Honey: it has rained twice today living in Taos is so much nicer than where I was living before H. Stones: it sounds more civilised to me Honey cease: nicer is better Desert Sage Honey: well it is more cultured there are a lot of artists n writers living here H. Stones: one day you must finish your book about Stamp Toilet days, Honey Dexter Fong: *n* writers? Desert Sage Honey: hehe yeah Dexter Fong: Sounds subversive Desert Sage Honey: "n" short for & Dexter Fong: Dine well Cat Dexter Fong: Ampersand Writers? Even more subversive Dexter Fong: Sybolists of the worst kind ah,clem: Stamp Toilet shound like a camping appliance Desert Sage Honey: oooh yeah enjoy your dinner, cat cease: i hope the stuffed trout is as wondrous as it was the last time i visited Fishworks H. Stones: ampersand, Fong, where are they at ? ah,clem: your participle is dangling, Stones Dexter Fong: IT"S technical Stones, involuntary electric current flowing thru the whispering whimpering sand H. Stones: ooh sorry, must be missing a button
Desert Sage Honey covers her eyes Dexter Fong: Who is it? H. Stones: well its not me, somebody open a window Dexter Fong: Sorry massuh, I don't do windows Desert Sage Honey: catherwood please open a window and turn on the fan ||||||||| Catherwood rushes over to Desert Sage Honey and inquires "Someone mention my name?" Dexter Fong: and I don't birf no babies Desert Sage Honey: proper eubonics Dex....& I don birf no babies H. Stones: its the only fan he has, Honey
Dexter Fong quickly boils some water
Dexter Fong weeps silently seeing how DS has been corrupted by those subversive smbolists
Dexter Fong and he's not entirely happy with his typing Desert Sage Honey: ah hand me a towel i shall have a nice steam facial thanks Dex Dexter Fong: Care to exfoliate while I give you the special "Al Gore" massage Desert Sage Honey: hmmmmmmm Dexter Fong: Tippers welcome hee hee cease: i hear that causes global warming, dex Dexter Fong: That's the effect I'm hoping to cause Desert Sage Honey: well then you will have to move away from the coastline Dex move inland somewhere that will not soon be inundated with water Desert Sage Honey: Nebraska? Dexter Fong: Ah! No madame...I was think of more local globes (nudge nudge) H. Stones: dont you mean with oil, he asked satirically Dexter Fong: thinking cease: ok, i'm off to eat. see ya'll next week ah,clem: "not much you can say about apathy" Dexter Fong: We use only high Omega-3 fishoil H. Stones: quick follow him home, he has food Dexter Fong: Mange Cat ah,clem: have a great meal, Cat ||||||||| cease is defenestrated just as the clock strikes 9:33 PM. Desert Sage Honey: i actually used to like tuna packed in oil now that will be all that I can find soon Dexter Fong: Well finally someone opened the window ah,clem: was that an oil spill joke, Honey? Desert Sage Honey: an obvious one I thought Dexter Fong: Yah think? =)) H. Stones: clem, do you want leaded or unleaded ?? ||||||||| Catherwood sneaks into the room, and snorts derisively "Announcing 'Elayne', also known as 'Nancy' -- the time is 9:35 PM" -- then he slowly retires back into the vestibule... Elayne: Evenin' all! ah,clem: well, I'm a little slow H. Stones: Hi Elayne Dexter Fong: Elayne!!!! Desert Sage Honey: Hello Elayne Dexter Fong: Cat just left for a fine dining experience Elayne: Hey Dex, I waved at you earlier today when I was in your (work) neighborhood. ah,clem: Pink Hotel cued, E Dexter Fong: Just in time E Elayne: Alas, Jimmy, I never heard back from that guy. Can you believe it? Dexter Fong: for PH I mean Dexter Fong: tough noogies for him then Dexter Fong: You gotta stick it out if you wanna stay young Elayne: Indeed. Let me turn on the CNI... ah,clem: is 16/11 mono, so not a great copy, but if listening will give hime the idea ah,clem: running "what this country needs" right now Elayne: Rob's coming in, he's going to run CNI from his machine instead (good 'n loud!). ||||||||| Catherwood escorts Robin into the room, accepts three dimes as a gratuity, mumbles something about 9:38 PM, then departs. Dexter Fong: Turn it up to eleven Elayne: Now let me turn off the CNI, I can't listen and chat at the same time. ||||||||| At 9:39 PM, Elayne vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted! ||||||||| Catherwood sneaks into the room, and announces "Announcing 'Elayne', also known as 'Nancy' -- the time is 9:39 PM" -- then he slowly retires back into the sitting room... Dexter Fong: Have a stick of gum, Elayne? ah,clem: lol ||||||||| Catherwood says "9:40 PM, time for SOMEONE to leave!", grabs Robin by the collar and gives 'em the old bum's rush out the door Desert Sage Honey: Catherwood please make me an absinthe ||||||||| Catherwood gives Desert Sage Honey an absinthe. Desert Sage Honey: absinthe makes the heart go fonder Dexter Fong: gonna afkfr while this album plays back soon ah,clem: $100 shine ;) Dexter Fong: Back in the ole days you could get a shine for a lot less, including his family Elayne: Oh dear, I just go to the shine sketch, I must be lagging. ah,clem: there is about a 2 minite lag, server buffers, E Dexter Fong: Elayne: You can't get the shine sketch anymor, Amos and Andy are not PC Elayne: To tell you the truth, Dex, I'm kind of cringing listening to it, so I can't blame 'em. Dexter Fong: E: PB dpes love his colored folk Dexter Fong: does Dexter Fong: It's an easy accent, and he's not that good at accents Elayne: At least I don't have to watch him in blackface. Dexter Fong: He was an or...aboriginal member of the Firesign Minstrels H. Stones: its when things get too PC that i start to cringe. i dont believe in banny words, i believe in humour Dexter Fong: Banny words? That's my nom du plume Desert Sage Honey: awwwwww (hugs Stones close) H. Stones: it should have said, banning Elayne: I never cringe at what people call "PC," Stones. I prefer people take others' feelings into account. Dexter Fong: Anette Banning under rated actress Elayne: Oh, Jimmy just said hi to all of us - hi Jimmy! Dexter Fong: Not down here in lower NYC ah,clem: ;) Dexter Fong: but High anyway ah,clem: we know, Dex Dexter Fong: Can you smell it there!? H. Stones: i got tired of it, Elayne, ar the rate they are going they will soon be saying there was no such thing as colonialism or slavery, first you ban some words, then next thing you know they are banning books and rewriting history Elayne: I can, Dex, but I don't think it's y ours. Dexter Fong: Ostracism and Ring Worm Elayne: Not "banning," Stones. Just thinking about people who don't necessarily share one's cultural viewpoint before opening one's pie hole. Dexter Fong: lol Elayne Dexter Fong: but it *is* mine in a certain wasy....I hope Dexter Fong: way ah,clem: the smell? Elayne: Um, you got me there, Dex. Dexter Fong: SOme people call *The SMELL* Dexter Fong: others call it pheromes ah,clem: lol Dex Desert Sage Honey: pharoahmoans Dexter Fong: DS? How do you make a hormone? H. Stones: you dont pay her Desert Sage Honey: lol ah,clem: drum roll H. Stones: bumbum Dexter Fong: and you beat her with a large stick...(Very important part of the process) H. Stones: there i go with my pie hole again Dexter Fong: Glad to see you intact again stones H. Stones: yes but not virgo intacti Dexter Fong: Who is,,You got a copy of venus de milo, you're not intact Ipso Facto Dexter Fong: Another nom du plume for my books of fact Dexter Fong: an' datsa fact Jack Elayne: Oh, I love that bit of dialogue: "Want an upper?" "No, my teeth are fine." Robin even laughed at that one. H. Stones: i can see you facts hangin in the air like a plume Fong Dexter Fong: Robin a tough laugh, E? Elayne: He's confused about the purring sound effect, though. Elayne: I'm sure part of it is a cultural thing, Dex. ah,clem: we all are ah,clem: may have to do with dead cat soap Dexter Fong: TELL HIMS IT A HIGH SCHOOL MOVIE PROJECTOR FROM THE FIFTIES< BEFORE THERE WERE DIGITS> H. Stones: it must be a cultural cleanup Dexter Fong: Sorry for the caps Elayne: He knew that, Dex. I guess I just didn't realize it. Dexter Fong: I'll stick to my Borsolino ||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 10 O'CLOCK", then silently exits. Elayne: He was trying to be ironic, and it went right over my head.
Dexter Fong cues the mandolins H. Stones: those low flying irons can be a real menace Dexter Fong: E: Strange he not much taller than you, is he? Elayne: He jumps a lot, Dex. Dexter Fong: These days, who doesn't? Dexter Fong: Goddam bycklers Dexter Fong: bycyclers? Dexter Fong: Seems to need a "k" Dexter Fong: Perhaps even a *special* "K' Dexter Fong: Those of you who prefer a "J" please retire to the boys bathrooom Dexter Fong: The rest of you go to "L" Dexter Fong: aND NO "p"EEING Dexter Fong: THAT WAS CURE Dexter Fong: CUTE...JEEZE i'VE GOT cAT'S SYNDROM Desert Sage Honey: hey now dont get gender specific with me I have always enjoyed a j in the mens loo H. Stones: is that where the Beat generation meet up ? Dexter Fong: DS: And that's why our parents broke us up, Honey Dexter Fong: That, and the grand theft auto Dexter Fong: When you beat my dad, that was the final straw Desert Sage Honey: right Dex I still have PTSD associated from those days H. Stones: did she beat your daddy, eight to the bar ? Dexter Fong: Stones: Hell, 8? H. Stones: Rave generation, Fong Dexter Fong: tEN IN A ROW..DA COLLAPSED WITH A HEART ATTACK AND I BECAME ADDICTED TO CAPITOL LETTERS Desert Sage Honey: he was a sore loser Dex H. Stones: ur favorite capital letters were E,s ah,clem: sombody kill Dex's caps lock key Desert Sage Honey: haha clem Dexter Fong: pROLLY STONES, but who's counting Elayne: Would a B B gun do it? Dexter Fong: Si Si ah,clem: depends on range ||||||||| Bunnyboy steals in around 10:09 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last month's "unpleasant incident." Bunnyboy: Ta-da! Desert Sage Honey: hey bunny Dexter Fong: I'm at home anywhere on the range H. Stones: Yo Bunny ah,clem: hey Bun Dexter Fong: Hiya Bunny Bunnyboy: (sings) Bb's got a gun...
Dexter Fong refrains "down by de ribbuh" Bunnyboy: (sings) It's all in fun! Elayne: Speaking of BB, Hey Bunnyboy! Bunnyboy: Hey! Dexter Fong: What if it was Bb's got a gub?
Bunnyboy points at note. Bunnyboy: No, "gun", it says...
Dexter Fong hands Bunnyboy the expliding dye pack of hundred dollar bills Dexter Fong: exploding ah,clem: read your script
Desert Sage Honey goes to graze in the kitchen afk H. Stones: but i like expliding, just dont know what it is Dexter Fong: Sounds like an aussie accent to me Stones Bunnyboy: Been waiting forever (well, 2 or 3 years) for a DVD release of THE LIFE OF REILLY, the marvelous one-man swan song of Charles Nelson Reilly... ah,clem: lol, Bunny Desert Sage Honey: william bendix bunny Dexter Fong: When I read Life of etc, I thought of that early radio and then TV sitcom Dexter Fong: Nice call DS Bunnyboy: No big DVD deal in the offing...but the producers are offering FREE press screener copies, with the purchase of CNR T-shirt. Bunnyboy: No, that one is RILEY. Bunnyboy:http://www.charlesnelsonreilly.com/ Dexter Fong: A number of regulars not here tonight Bunnyboy: Saw the Reilly film in a theatre. Funny, poignant and grand. H. Stones: syrup of figs would keep them more regular Bunnyboy: Dex: There all patrolling the Northern border. Elayne: Must be getting an early start on the holiday weekend, Dex. Dexter Fong: Canter square, Bunny, center square Dexter Fong: Likely E Bunnyboy: Keepin' those Canadians from stealin' our jobs! ||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and Principalpoop plummets into the garden at 10:18 PM. Dexter Fong: Bunny: Northern border of what? Dexter Fong: Hey poop H. Stones: greetings Poopster Elayne: Hey PrinPoop! Principalpoop: don't start with me grrrrr Dexter Fong: Down boy Principalpoop: woof woof Elayne: What's the matter, Prin?: Principalpoop: mad dog poop H. Stones: throws Poop a stick
Dexter Fong slipspoop a boneo Principalpoop: something about life and cherries and pits Principalpoop: how are you all doing? Dexter Fong: Poop: When life hands you pits, throw somebody into it ah,clem: good evening Mr. Principal Principalpoop: be funny, make me laugh, now grrrr Principalpoop: hi ahh, clem Dexter Fong: gggrrreat! ah,clem: I am trying Principalpoop: fong is doing great, that is perfect Principalpoop: gasahole works fine ah,clem: yes Principalpoop: just need time to assimilate ahh, clem Elayne: I don't think anybody's being a gasahole this evening. Dexter Fong: That gasahole was once just a little gasapit ah,clem: O'Tay Principalpoop: disrepect and turmoil everywhere again
Dexter Fong looks aroung for darla Dexter Fong: quick afk Elayne: Speaking of disrespect and turmoil, anyone have any favorites in the World Cup? Principalpoop: get me please fong grrrr Principalpoop: i am more of a saucer man myself ah,clem: ok, here is your game, E ah,clem: (saved) Principalpoop: michelle, maa belle Elayne: I was wondering when they'd get in their mandatory Beatles ref... Elayne: Who voiced that female character just then? Elayne: Is that Melinda? ah,clem: don't know Principalpoop: save the drunk one-eyed snake Elayne: Robin likes the Pink Hotel bit a lot. I guess we're both at that age to remember text games. (I sucked at them.) Dexter Fong: There's the snake ah,clem: they had a certain charm ||||||||| It's 10:30 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| Desert Sage Honey - dead from the fiddlers ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... Principalpoop: poop: restrains himslef Principalpoop: the fiddlers got honey, rats ah,clem: E W E S climb wall Dexter Fong: Poop: For Respect, call 1-888-STOP Bunnyboy: Text adventure games were the best. Principalpoop: find out what it means to me? Elayne: "One controlled fall after another..." pretty much describes my life too. :) ah,clem: it's a very good album Dexter Fong: For restraint call 1-888HEAL ah,clem: sad out of print Elayne: Well, it's a good series of sketches. But I do like the title bit a lot. Dexter Fong: I think the "Over the Edge Segment is truly funny and zany too with great improv ah,clem: and now the mune Elayne: I am SOOO not a top ten scorer... Dexter Fong: Yes, the forsaken myune (Ancient Thai) Dexter Fong: Well, almost..........lol Principalpoop: i forget how many cereal box treasures told me that I was not a winner ah,clem: as well you should Dexter Fong: Cereal box treasures!!?? In my day you were lucky if there was any cereal in the box Bunnyboy: Anybody know where the Mr. Liverface bit came from? Hour Hour? Sumpin else? H. Stones: i was so poor i had to eat the plastic submarine Bunnyboy: Dead Pet Pet Food. Principalpoop: wasn't he one of the dick tracy villans on radio? ah,clem: did it surface? Dexter Fong: Bunny: I think it's later than HH, maybe In the next world? H. Stones: eventually, clem, yes Principalpoop: i remember those, put in a little baking soda and vinegar Dexter Fong: Plastic!!!!!!!!???? My sub was granite Dexter Fong: Thousands in dentist's bills Elayne: Ah well, Robin's left the room. That's his Firesign tolerance reached. ah,clem: thank grid for baking soda Elayne: I was hoping he'd get into the Hemlock Stones stuff. Dexter Fong: Who He? Clem? This is still pink hotel Principalpoop: making fun of sherlock oversteps the bounds of english decency, bad form that Bunnyboy: Dex: Nope. That's Dead Cat Soap. ah,clem: of course it is, as it is out last movie of the evening Bunnyboy: And it wasn't on any of the Columbia/Rhino/Butterfly discs. Dexter Fong: Thank Godee were not English (is Stones Gone?) ah,clem: our H. Stones: there is no English decency anymore, its all binge drinking and a kerbside quiche Bunnyboy: I've heard in recently on RFO, but I know I'd heard it before. Principalpoop: quite ah,clem: binge drinking! yes ||||||||| Catherwood enters with Desert Sage Honey close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 10:40 PM tree-stunting plans, and dashes off to the sitting room. Principalpoop: wb honey H. Stones: and dont forget the kerbside quiche Dexter Fong: Bunny: Yes..Maybe Cat would know, but he's out to lun...dinner Bunnyboy: Yes, they're french-kissing the curbs. Desert Sage Honey: hey hi i am back gee someone must not like me using their free wifi Dexter Fong: Quiche me once and quiche me twice and then just gra..... ah,clem: I know the bit, but can't say where it is without research Principalpoop: slowing down their pron downloads H. Stones: you're a bad bugger Honey ah,clem: and since I am on the air,.... Dexter Fong: Stones: "bad"? pr just bad? Principalpoop: good air that ahh, clem Desert Sage Honey: hey if there is not a lock on it it is free!!! Dexter Fong: And if there is a lock, X-CON locksmiths can help you Dexter Fong: Night Hours Only Principalpoop: if not free, liberate it Desert Sage Honey: hehe Dexter Fong: STEAL THIS PODCAST H. Stones: do you know what connurbation is Fong ?
Desert Sage Honey is afraid to ask Principalpoop: to connurbate H. Stones: lol Dexter Fong: stones: Yes...Conning someone's 'bation H. Stones: yes, its what convicts do in their cells after lights out Dexter Fong: You mean get a tattoo? Desert Sage Honey: lol Principalpoop: guffaw Dexter Fong: Okay Bruno, bend over...I want to do an early English Landscape H. Stones: now you are kicking against the pricks Desert Sage Honey: sepia tone i bet Principalpoop: talking about the world cup again? Dexter Fong: Stones: Not the pricks!!man...The *screws* , man Dexter Fong: Gimme a gang sign dude Elayne: Ah, there's the next Beatles ref. H. Stones: we dont talk about the war or the world cup in front of the Germans, it makes some of us laugh Principalpoop: i missed it E, which was it? Elayne: I think I'm not going to last. The cat's started meowing and it's really ruining the listening experience for me. Dexter Fong: I loved the Dave Clark Five reference ah,clem: they are full of them Elayne: PrinPoop, the walrus thing in the Hemlock sketch. Elayne: Missed that one, Dex. ah,clem: or it... Principalpoop: some german told it was revenge for wimbledon 1966, Dexter Fong: koo koo ka chu (spelling optional) Principalpoop: missed it Dexter Fong: Some say "Goo Goo Ga tchew H. Stones: in Britain we have a saying..... If you invent a game, dont tell any foreigners about it! Principalpoop: meow is nothing, you can wait until they start making bread on parts of your body... Dexter Fong: I heard about that SAtones Elayne: I'd best head out. Next week, all. Principalpoop: captain equinox ||||||||| At 10:49 PM, Elayne runs out the door saying "Hey, mister ice-cream man, I've got a nickel, wait for meeeee..." H. Stones: We have may of the best players in the world Dexter, trouble is we cannot play as a team Dexter Fong: Happy fourth Elayne Principalpoop: thanks E, avoid the pits, if possible Dexter Fong: though I know you're alrady gone Desert Sage Honey: night night E Bunnyboy: I'm a sneaker. Ta!
Bunnyboy shuffles off ||||||||| "10:50 PM? I'm late!" exclaims Bunnyboy, who then runs out through the french doors and down through the bushes. Desert Sage Honey: adios bunny H. Stones: a terrible thing is the Shuffles Dexter Fong: Stones: I humbly confess that I've always found soccer somewhat boring, but with the advent of the *vuvuzela* it's now downright annoying Desert Sage Honey: the shuffles is a lot like the aztec 2 step i have heard H. Stones: in my case, a lot more than somewhat, fong Dexter Fong: ah...a hands across the pond moment =)) Principalpoop: the aztecs invented soccer, using heads Dexter Fong: The Aztecs invented the vacation too H. Stones: As George Burns used to say, "If at first you dont succeed, maybe failure is your thing!" Principalpoop: after the calender, yes Dexter Fong: I thought it was if at first etc, find a great partner like Gracie H. Stones: it can sure help, Fong Dexter Fong: ..then give her alll th laughs Dexter Fong: Stones: Are you familiar with their radio shows? H. Stones: yes i am fong Principalpoop: stones is the walrus? H. Stones: i liked him even when i was too young to get the jokes H. Stones: i am more of an egg man Dexter Fong: and do you know the movie "Kiss of evil" richard widmarks first big movie wherin he's a psycho who pushes an old lady down a flight of stairs....in a wheel chair H. Stones: sounds familiar, Fong Principalpoop: kookoo a chew Principalpoop: like jimmy cagney pushing a grapefruit in the girls face Dexter Fong: There's an B&A episode with Widmark shortly after the movie came out in which goerge urges him to play his pycho character 'cause gracie hhhran into his car H. Stones: i dont recall that fong Dexter Fong: Every threatening thing he says, Gracie misconstrues...it's brilliant ||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 11 O'CLOCK", then silently exits. ah,clem: good night everyone, have a great week! Principalpoop: i misconstrue too, anybody seen him lately? Dexter Fong: Okay guys I'm on my way outta town tomorrow so must leave eary Principalpoop: thank you ahh, clem, best of luck bambi and all too Principalpoop: happy 4th all H. Stones: an i have a visitor coming to stay tomorrow so i guess the bus is going H. Stones: thanks specially to clem Dexter Fong: Yes indeed, thanks clem and (of course) Bambi Dexter Fong: Hey Merlyn was absent H. Stones: i second that Fong Dexter Fong: So you noticed to eh? Stones? Principalpoop: no seconds oliver H. Stones: have a good 4th y'all Principalpoop: toad away Dexter Fong: Stay safe and blow up the old Guy H. Stones: it was strangely muted in the room tonight, i felt it myself Principalpoop: back to the pits, grrrrrr H. Stones: something in the stars i guess Dexter Fong: Night Poop, hope you're alittle cheerier =)) H. Stones: pokes Poop with a stick to keep him enraged Principalpoop: you blunted the fury, thanks Principalpoop: woof woof, woof Dexter Fong: Without pits, we wouldn't have olives...and sepias...and deep chocolate ebonys Dexter Fong: see yah next time Principalpoop: toad away again H. Stones: havea great week all and stay safe. H. Stones: nighty night Principalpoop: i am losing my mind Principalpoop: as if I had one to start with Principalpoop: toad away Principalpoop: i will sing along this time Principalpoop: that helps :) ah,clem: sorry for the delay, server was having a problem ah,clem: all better now Principalpoop: i need to update winamp ||||||||| Catherwood accompanies Honey into the room, accepts a wooden nickel as a gratuity, grumbles something about 11:06 PM, then departs. ah,clem: nytol ||||||||| 11:06 PM -- ah,clem left for parts unknown.(Entry from Nick Danger's "Idiots I Have Been Paid To Follow"). Principalpoop: hi honey Honey: nite clem thanks for the show Honey: hi poop Principalpoop: nope, got anything? Honey: um er ahhh meet me in the closet Honey: i have applied for a medicalmarijuana card Principalpoop: do I need to bring anything, straw? needle? bong? glass? Honey: got a vaporizer? Principalpoop: never used one of those in years, the one we had before was for vicks Honey: hey stones hi hi hi hi hi Honey: i remember those poop Principalpoop: makes my eyes water but clears up the lungs ||||||||| It's 11:10 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| Desert Sage Honey - dead from the fiddlers ||||||||| Dexter Fong - dead from jaundice ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... Honey: i wonder if stones is snoozin Principalpoop: he said something about something Honey: looks like we are all that is left of the evening Principalpoop: kiss me you fool Honey: hahahaha Principalpoop: Smack! Principalpoop: so, what are you wearing? hehe Honey: snarfle Principalpoop: snarfle, ahh sexy Principalpoop: i figured stones would interrupt this, he must be snoozing Honey: desert storm combat boots thick woolen tights and a grannie nightgown with roses on it oh and my hairnet Honey: ya he must be Principalpoop: ahh, you have reading my pron fantasy request emails, naughty honey Honey: hehe Honey: sigh Principalpoop: been, you have been, what is it called when you drop entire words and not just a letter or 2? Principalpoop: dementia? insanity, stupidity? Honey: i kept getting thrown off the internet and then i had to download the latest zonealarm so i have been mostly missing in action ronight Principalpoop: poop is all of the above Principalpoop: i used to love zone alarm, but comcast balks when I use it now Honey: tonight they moved that damn t too Principalpoop: which T? Honey: whoevers wifi i am appropriating is with Qwest Principalpoop: are those the ones who cooperated with or refused the bush evesdropping? Principalpoop: without a warrant Honey: no idea i just called his phone it is busy he must be chatting up another of his american birds Principalpoop: one of them refused, I forget which Principalpoop: 1am in stones ville? i hope everything is ok Principalpoop: late for a non honey phone call Principalpoop: wait, add 5 minus one for daylights savings time Honey: eh he was calling me at the same time doh so he left voice message that the room was closed and he would talk with me tomorrow Principalpoop: LOOL Honey: he didnt even have the decency to take his name with him!!! why I nevah ||||||||| It's 11:20 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| H. Stones - dead from the yaws ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... Principalpoop: quite, bad form that Principalpoop: finally Honey: more like dead from the yawns Principalpoop: good that the yaws got him Honey: uh huh but what eggzakly are the yaws anyway>? Principalpoop: you have heard of hem and haws Honey: uh huh Principalpoop: this is yem and yaws Honey: ahhhhhh yiddish Honey: so here I am finally entrenched in my own little casita in Taos things are looking up Principalpoop: actually we did it, y'all come back now y hear? yaws welcome anytime Principalpoop: sweet Honey: oh yeah i forgot about the okies Principalpoop: do they have wifi in finokie yet? Honey: so you live in Virginia? gee i have no idea wifi okies doubtful Principalpoop: he was an okie from finokie as I recall Principalpoop: yes, virginia, old times here are not forgotten, the morons Honey: aaaaaaaaa that was Muskogee I think Honey: hehe look away look away Principalpoop: don't make me google, I will, I will google if challenged Honey: simmah dahn Principalpoop: you were right Honey: simmah dahn now Principalpoop: i was wrong Principalpoop: no wonder people looked at me funny for years when I tried to sing that line Honey: you should have heard the way i used to sing it Principalpoop: belt it out Honey: absolutely filthy version I am not fond of Okies Honey: I had to live there for a few years that felt like centuries Principalpoop: i drove through it once, maybe, does 10 go through there? Principalpoop: or is it north of I10? Honey: no Principalpoop: oops, never seen it then Honey: that is farther south thru texas Principalpoop: yes Honey: have you been feeling any earthquakes these days> Principalpoop: in virginia? no, but I know we can have some Principalpoop: not california earthquakes, but it can Principalpoop: i should watch the news more Honey: i heard there we some in pennsylvania recently Principalpoop: and canada, northeast usa Honey: i have that earthquake watch thingy on my stumble page Principalpoop: you are in my favorites, i check back from time to time Honey: pretty weird huh? Principalpoop: the earth is alive, alive I say, hahahaha Honey: thats flattering i havent done much with my front pages lately but if you click on ALL you will find what interest me these days Principalpoop: that was a mad scientist laugh, not a funny haha laugh Principalpoop: don't update on my account, i try not to go to my wells too often Honey: i could tell but i didnt want to be rude or offend you while you were acting strange Principalpoop: acting? not acting, hahahaha
Honey smiles sweetly Principalpoop: not sure what sort of laugh belongs there hehe Honey: demoniacally laughing Principalpoop: i think of your tough times and compare them to mine, and I have no reason to complain Honey: like the guy who was in reefer madness playin the piana Principalpoop: but it is still not easy sometimes, almost Principalpoop: that was me hehehe Honey: you sure dont and hopefully no more tough times for me now neither Principalpoop: ahh a little tough, would not want you to go soft lol
Principalpoop D Honey: tough times are totally relative to those who are experiencing them Principalpoop: yes Principalpoop: like incest, that is all relative Honey: well i am a pretty tough broad i can hang in here with the best of em Honey: indeed Principalpoop: stop, I will not stand for you to talk about generous sweet honey like that Principalpoop: put up your dukes Honey: do you have plans for the 4fh of july? Principalpoop: i used to drink a fifth on the fourth, have not for over, ahh heck 30 years now Principalpoop: find some BBQ ribs and eat them is all Honey: a good thing Principalpoop: ahh it was a good time, i passed out under the washington monument several years Honey: mmmmmmm yeah i think i am gunna buy a rack of babybacks some watermelon and just chill out Principalpoop: you start doing that when it is not the 4th of july, causes complaints Honey: not around here this is the land of manana Principalpoop: no babybacks, give me the long pork ribs Honey: those are good too yum Principalpoop: a slab or 2, yum Honey: slow bbq them Principalpoop: cold for the next day meal also Principalpoop: i let the experts do it now, practice has not made perfect with my efforts Honey: i dont have a hibachi or grill anymore so i will have to do them in the oven Principalpoop: that works ok, except I am appalled by the amount of grease that is usually burned off by fire
Honey reminds herself she needs to get a new toaster Principalpoop: toasters are cheap, but don't buy the cheapest, you can burn yourself on the outside of them Principalpoop: i learned that the hard way Honey: i remember eating homemade ice cream too back in the day Principalpoop: yes, mister chloesterols homemade dessert Principalpoop: yum Honey: yeah not the cheapest for sure i let my ex housemate take his back when he cam e to helo me move Principalpoop: they have new ones now, you can put in the freezer while it turns, Principalpoop: no more fooling around with adding ice and stuff, for hours Honey: yesh i have seen them Honey: but in a way having to wait the anticipation was wonderful Principalpoop: my dad talked of the non-electric ice cream makers, you earned your ice cream that way hehe Honey: well if you had to turn and turn and turn the crank you DID earn it Principalpoop: exactly, but he bought an electric, was not going to do that again hehe Principalpoop: i should start a garden Honey: hey thats what my 1st stepmonter said kids were for and doing the dishes and dusting and vaccuming cleaning out the garage Principalpoop: my parents grew bell peppers, easy to grow, now they cost 3 dollars a pepper in the store, I am outraged Honey: yes! a victory garden! Principalpoop: but I have a black thumb, I can kill ivy in a pot Honey: if i am still here next year i will plant a garden for sure Principalpoop: too much water or too little, poor things Honey: and here in the hood where i live there are free fruit trees peach apricot apple all one has to do is go gather them Principalpoop: yum Honey: the key the secret is to water at night Principalpoop: put them up, they will last all year Honey: since i dont pay for the water here it will be perfect to plant a garden Principalpoop: watching my parents, it is not complicated, just takes time Principalpoop: cool, part of the rent Honey: yeah i used to do that at my house in albuquerque apricots plums cherries i would can them put in jars make jam outta the apricots and strawberries from the garden Principalpoop: we have a well, i pay for the water by paying for the electric for the well Honey: well that is worth it having a well it must be good water Principalpoop: oops, the idiot talking to an expert Honey: i do have to pay the electric here Principalpoop: no, lots of dirt and hard Principalpoop: the screens on the washing machine get clogged every 3 months, Honey: i hope you have a good water filter then or use a britta Principalpoop: a little better than miami, that was brown, with sand hehe Honey: dang that is pretty hard water Principalpoop: yes I got one, hate having to do that Principalpoop: i like the bottled water in LA Principalpoop: crystal lake or something, at my grandmothers house Honey: i remember growin up in LA in the fifties we drank arrowhead water delivered every weel Principalpoop: a big water cooler thing Principalpoop: arrowhead, yum Honey: week Honey: yeah Principalpoop: i would get that here, if they offered it Principalpoop: i won't buy the coke water, that is robbery Honey: i remember filling a glass with water from the tap in los angeles and i swear you could see fish shit in it Principalpoop: tap water from atlanta, put in a jar, the crooks Principalpoop: yes, don't look at it, same as miami water Honey: yeah the last coca cola i attempted to drink smelled like sulphur it was horrible Principalpoop: ewwww Honey: i usually keep a can of coke or something around in case my blood sugar crashes Principalpoop: how can you tell when it crashes? Honey: i get jittery and nauseos and fainty Principalpoop: ok Principalpoop: i have had that, i will try a coke or candy bar hehe Principalpoop: i thought it was too much coffee and nicotine Honey: yeah i used to have hypoglycemia then it just flipped to being diabetic ||||||||| Catherwood walks in wearing his pyjamas, yawns, and mumbles "It's midnight here in New York city"...then he falls over and starts snoring loudly.. Honey: so a candy bar used to work too Principalpoop: i had a proffessor, had to almost manually adjust his levels Principalpoop: a beer or candy bar or insulin or whatever was needed to push it in the right direction Honey: gee lets put catherwoods hand in a bowl of luke warm water hehe ||||||||| Catherwood gets in a bowl of luke warm water hehe. Principalpoop: hehe Honey: ;p; Honey: even better cathie Honey: lol Principalpoop: that M lool Principalpoop: muskogee, hard to beleive I had that wrong for years Honey: well i best get back to doing something worthwhile before i head for bed Have a happy and safe 4th Poop
Honey hugs poop Principalpoop: you too, glad you have a castilo, bueno, muerto bueno or something like that
Honey smoochies Honey: goodnight Principalpoop: thanks, I need that, hug for you too Principalpoop: nightnight ||||||||| At 12:05 AM, Principalpoop runs out the door saying "Hey, mister ice-cream man, I've got a nickel, wait for meeeee..."
Honey ) ||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and sdfghjklertycvb plummets into the garden at 12:10 AM. sdfghjklertycvb: anyone still here? ||||||||| It's 12:20 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| sdfghjklertycvb - dead from the fiddlers ||||||||| Honey - dead from dengue fever ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... ||||||||| Catherwood enters, and announces to all and sundry "It's 4:32 AM, time to change the log file and clean out unused rooms; please exit the chat room for a minute or two. Thank you for your patience."
The Evening's Participants: ah,clem
Desert Sage Honey