A Firesign Chat


||||||||| Catherwood re-enters the Waiting Room and explains "This is the main discussion room which is logged each night."
||||||||| Catherwood announces, "The time is 4:33 AM - I now declare Thursday's chat log for February 10, 2011 officially open!"... and then, he retires back to the vestibule...
||||||||| Catherwood strides in with a trumpet, plays a fanfare, and proclaims "Nine PM on Thursday, February 10, 2011 - I now declare alt.comedy.firesgn-thtre's chat officially open!" -- then he looks around at the empty room, looks at his watch, and mumbles "...am I early?"
: Well, the disk is full
: so we don't have names
: and I don't know how long the chat can last
: and there won't be any login messages
: huh?
: well that is interesting...
: see ya when the disks aren't ful
: have a great week
: ok stranger
: Merlyn wanders around and looks up
: "anyone home?" says Merlyn
: (taps microphone...) Is This On....?
: "who's thar?" asks Merlyn
: no_anchovies
: It's pitch black...you're likely to be eaten by a grue
: so we're chatting Merl, it's just not functioning normally?
||||||||| New CNI streaming notice: 'playing something by Firesign'
the disk is full so it can't write names
: yeh, strange.
: no colon?
: who's in charge of taking out the trash?
: I had to patch the code so it wouldn't auto-log you out
: anybody home?
: if it can't find your name in the list, it figures you're dead
: Merlyn here
: ah... you're the chatroom admin?
: yep
: but I can't stop the disk from filling up
: testing
: so we got no names
: ok, let's identify ourselves. I'm llanwydd
: would it help you if i log off temporarily?
: nope
: the disk is full, and something is probably keeping it full
: hey Llano.
: no_anchovies here.
: I've sent email to the sysadmin, but no telling when it will get fixed
: lol
: How can you be in NO place at once when we're not anywhere at all?
: we're metaphysically absurd
: llan: ok, here's what we do. we put our names at the beginning of each "send"
: llan: good idea, me
: Merlyn laughs
: no_anchovies: worth a try.
: lol
: Merlyn: anyway, FT is on CNI
: Merlyn: Hello Mr Lol, can I call you "ha"?
: no_anchovies: i wasn't expecting a "D.I.Y." kind o' night. `_~
: Merlyn: we're the Man With No Name
: llan: it read "no name" with this curious epitaph...
: no_anchovies: i almost didn't log in. perhaps others are thinking along those lines?
: Merlyn: "Not from around here"
: Merlyn: earlier, you'd get logged right back out, so maybe they gave up
: Hi, I'm CLASSIFIED, and I'm a
: llan: I bet they'll try later
: Merlyn: Welcome to the first meeting of Fireheads Anonymous, strictly enforced
: no_anchovies: no more zizzing 'n' dripping, like with the tropical fishes...
: llan: I guess
: Merlyn: I don't know if this chat will get saved or posted if the disk is still full
: no_anchovies: prolly not.
: it's weird, it adds the chat text OK
: which is just appending a file
: Merlyn was here
: no_anchovies: the classic chat that wasn't there.
: Hi, I'm CLASSIFIED, and I'm a
: no_anchovies: yeah, i noticed that.
: llan: I'm CERTIFIED as they say in britain
: Merlyn: I'm glassified
: no_anchovies: a conundrum.
: llan: I'm GLASSY EYED
: Merlyn: A Conan Drum?
: Merlyn: I can see that the disk continues to slowly fill up
: no_anchovies: Barbarian, or O'Brian ?
: llan: with what?
: Merlyn: Conan the O'Barbarian
: Merlyn: or maybe Conan O'Canada
: no_anchovies: "even Kathy Berbarian knows, there's one roulade she can't sing..."
: llan: you remember the movie UHF with Conan the Librarian?
: llan: that was hilarious
: no_anchovies: Al Yankovic ?
: Merlyn: vaguely
: llan: yeah, that one
: no_anchovies: that movie reminds me of the one Proctor was in... "Tunnelvision" ?
: Merlyn: It could've had a sequel, VHF
: llan: I never got to see Tunnelvision
: no_anchovies: worth seeing. i think it was on VHS, but never DVD.
: llan: I remember seeing the ads for it on tv when it came out
: I saw it when it came out, I think, but I didn't know what Phil Proctor looked like
: 1976
: no_anchovies: then we're older than you (lol) !
: Merlyn: Howard Hessman and Ron Silver too
: Merlyn: I'm 53
: llan: well I started on fst when I was in high school
: Merlyn: I knew Firesign Theatre back then, but not really what they looked like
: no_anchovies: gotta start young, if you're gonna stick it out.
: I saw their albums in stores before I ever heard them. I loved the album titles
: llan: I wrote that line
: llan: then I saw Big Mystery Joke Book in a book store and read most of Giant Rat
: no_anchovies: (hands Llan his ten-percent)
: llan: then when I was a sophomore or junior in high school an english teacher played The Further Adventures of Nick Danger for our class on the last day of school
: llan: the teacher had to work at the school after the students were out so I went up there to borrow 2 Places from him
: llan: a few days later he lent me Electrician
: llan: so how did you get into FST?
: follow along as we learn our next three words in......Egyptian ;-)
: Merlyn: I think one of my older brothers
: no_anchovies: heard "Electrician" circa '70? older brother of a friend had it on.
: llan: let me try something here. Hey, how's Catherwood?
||||||||| Catherwood lets try something here hey how's.
: Catherwood, can you still function ?
||||||||| Catherwood strides up to and queries "Did you want something?"
: llan: well, the problem isn't catherwood taking the night off
||||||||| Catherwood walks up to and asks "Someone mention my name?"
: far out Catherwood, just roll a couple of bombers and leave them on the side table.
||||||||| Catherwood fars out just roll a couple of bombers and leave them on the side table.
: no_anchovies: Merl, you obviously neglected to close the clothes mode.
: Catherwood: Read Me Doctor Memory ?
||||||||| Catherwood reads doctor memory.
: Catherwood, was your mother a Bozoette at school?
||||||||| Catherwood strides up to and queries "Do you have something for me to do?"
: Merlyn: open clothes mode
: llan: so what's on cni?
: what?
: Merlyn: not sure right now, Mark Time was on earlier
: principlepoop says mothermayI
: llan: wilkommen, princ
: pp danke
: pp so the recession has hit the firesign chat too
: llan: you might say so
: pp I just did
: llan: as no_anchovies said, its DIY night tonight
: no_anchovies: Obama has failed to sufficiently stimulate, apparently.
: pp strangely biden stimulates me
: llan: yeah, I'm getting tired of obama
: Merlyn: it's the economy, we can't give out free names any more
: llan: wasn't he supposed to stop the war and bring peace and prosperity? seems to me that's what I heard before the last election
: BYOName
: pp or just close gitmo for christs sake
: llan: just another politician
: pp he could do that in 10 seconds, he is the effing president
: pp with the billions spend every month on those wars, i give up
: pp but don't you give up
: Merlyn: give updoc
: pp senator webb gave up
: llan: I haven't voted for a republican in many years but who knows
: pp open memram
: pp a new england republican is no republican lol
: no_anchovies: irony is, the U.S. has been beating the crap out of everybody for so long, it actually is, in some danger.
: no_anchovies: they've created their own threat.
: llan: and not Nick
: pp as we told each other in the navy, paybacks are a bitch
: no_anchovies: self-fulfilled.
: pp the illusion of control is intoxicating
: Merlyn: So USA needs AA?
: pp I know why we are nobodys tonight, cat is not here, the nexus of our reality
: no_anchovies: ICH meinen wir sind alle Bozos fort dieses Autobus : llan: fascism is coming back into vogue in america
: pp yes M
: llan: now who the hell is Autobus?
: pp yes ll
: pps no anchovies
: Merlyn: is it coming back into Cosmo too?
: no_anchovies: doesn't recall when it wasn't?
: pp beep beep
: llan: LOL Merlyn
: Merlyn: "hand me the fascist section"
: pp http://wattsupwiththat.com/2010/12/27/an-end-of-an-era-the-incandescent-light-bulb/
: Merlyn: that's from a jack poet ad; Bergman says it so it sounds like "fashion section"
: no_anchovies: hands Merl "The Book Of Punter"
: llan: I never made the connection. Fashion/Fascist
: pp yo and i say unto thee yo
: no_anchovies: this is the best non-chat ever.
: pp how about fashionistas?
: pp up yours
: no_anchovies: close the clothes mode on the fashionistas.
: llan: so how's the weather in your part of the world
: Merlyn: also, the names are swapped in the sense that the woman has a man's name and vice-versa
: no_anchovies: 70's here.
: pp snow last night, all melted today, still cold
: llan: where are you, no_anchovies?
: no_anchovies: Farenheit, not the decade. (San Diego)
: pp name swappers, wasn't that a tv show?
: llan: aha. are you paul?
: pp all my brothers and sister were born in coronado
: no_anchovies: it's me, from P.E., Llan.
: llan: I thought so
: oh, it's Breakfast with the Brunts
: Merlyn: http://www.firesigntheatre.com/fstads/jp_breakfastwiththebrunts.ram
: Dick and Jane Brunt
: no_anchovies: i think i've settled on "no_anchovies" as a nick, now.
: pp i cannot use my headphones now
: Merlyn: ok no
: llan: I'm in Florida lately. 50s at night, 60s in the day
: Merlyn: no head?
: no_anchovies: i've never liked "Real Player." i don't load it.
: pp better than quicktime
: llan: LOL, Merl
: pp always hated quicktime
: no_anchovies: screw proprietary files.
: Merlyn: can't please everyone
: pp no ears, they keep slipping down
: Here's the MP3: http://www.firesigntheatre.com/fstads/jp_breakfastwiththebrunts.mp3
: pp hard to wear my glasses too
: llan: I used to love stereo headphones
: no_anchovies: quicktime plays MPEG tho'. that's something.
: no_anchovies: ah, thx.
: llan: great for listening to FST
: pp yes
: no_anchovies: yup. you can wait in the sitting room, or sit in the waiting room... in STEEEREO Hi-Fi.
: Merlyn: who's the narrator in that anyway?
: Merlyn: Dick and Jane are Bergman and Proctor
: pp run bergman run
: pp see proctor see
: llan: that's the second time tonight I've been redirected to "amrad"
: Merlyn: so who's the narrator?
: do i really need to write pp? you cannot tell it is me writing what I write?
: the narrator is on first
: Merlyn: yer just a colon otherwise
: who's on first?
: pp belches, good idea m
: pp the narrator, moron
: the narrator is a moron?
: is he a polygamist too?
: pp i don't know, no headphones
: no_anchovies: Ossman usually does voice-over parts, but yeah, that doesn't quite sound like him.
: pp who is asking that?
: Merlyn: I think it was pp, there was no name
: no_anchovies: how many times do we have to polygamize?
: pp you got my dander up, do it some more
: pp I would not have asked if it was my, I know when I ask something
: Merlyn: we need polymers for polygamy
: no_anchovies: Nino sez, no one is chatting. it may be true that we are not here?
: Merlyn: welded for life
: no_anchovies: it boggles the mind.
: pp now I am scared
: Merlyn: correct, we are undetectable by Nino in this diskful state
: Merlyn: Nino's mind is already boggled
: llan: this is like the twighlight zone
: llan: or however you spell it
: pp oops, we are ok, the cheeselog exists, that was close
: Merlyn: The cheeselog is just this same file
: pp so if that file was not there, then we would not be here
: llan: he must have a qulte in his hed
: no_anchovies: interesting that the log records, but we're not actually logg'd in.
: pp that is why I said whew
: Merlyn: for some reason, our names can't be written in
: pp quilt
: pp like quill with a t at the end
: no_anchovies: i also suspect that this state of unfairs, is keeping our fellow bozos at bay.
: llan: a helt in your cud
: Merlyn: but the text we type can still get appended. I don't know why they differ
: no_anchovies: Merl, can you change the message on the homepage to say "Log In Anyway" ?
: pp it is an enigma wrapped in a puzzle shoved up the ass of a riddle
: pp tickled himself
: no_anchovies: instead of "Disk Full, Working on it" ?
: pp, ahhh, my waiting room link in my favorites jumps here with my name and chat options already set
: pp i have not seen the log in page in 14 years
: Merlyn: I can, but I was also going to leave
: pp if you leave, we are lost
: no_anchovies: i thought the Cap'n goes down with the ship?
: Merlyn: stuff will still work as well as it does now
: pp 2 or 3 men sailed, from the san francisco bay chat
: Catherwood, flog that Merlyn.
||||||||| Catherwood rushes alongside and says "Did you want me?"
: flog merlyn catherwood
||||||||| Catherwood walks alongside and says "Typing my name just to rile me, eh?"
: principlepoop says flog merlyn catherwood
||||||||| Catherwood strides up to and mumbles "Stop typing gibberish, !"
: Catherwood, hit principal poop with a lash
||||||||| Catherwood rushes alongside and asks "Do you have something for me to do?"
: no_anchovies: i suspect Catherwood's never heard of flogging... just frottage, perhaps?
||||||||| Catherwood walks up to and queries "Did you need me?"
: llan: well, I'm takin a powda
: Merlyn: me too
: pp thinks catherwood requires a speakers name to respond properly
||||||||| Catherwood walks alongside and mumbles "Stop typing gibberish, !"
: llan: Nite Folks
: no_anchovies: okay fellers. same bat channel.
: ahh the bus huh? ok ok, super week all
: pp says night night, week week
: Merlyn: And so ends the first meeting of Firehead Anonymous, strictly enforced
: name?
: No name. I was CLASSIFIED, myself.
: AKA FireHeadObject.
: AKA Bunnyboy
crawls back into the bag
||||||||| Catherwood enters, and announces to all and sundry "It's 4:32 AM, time to change the log file and clean out unused rooms; please exit the chat room for a minute or two. Thank you for your patience."

The Evening's Participants:

URL References:

Rogue's Gallery:

cat_pp.jpg (5168 bytes)
PP and Cat(cease)

newbunny.jpg (4426 bytes)

capeken.jpg (7639 bytes)
kend^/Dr. Headphones

ossman+me.gif (6000 bytes)
Merlyn and Tirebiter

capedoc.jpg (6006 bytes)

newlili.jpg (6085 bytes)

freq.jpg (4441 bytes)

roto.jpg (6046 bytes)

babs_so.jpg (5555 bytes)
LeatherG & SO

nino1.jpg (5352 bytes)

tonk1.jpg (6123 bytes)

ahclem+Bambi.jpg (9500 bytes)
Ah, Clem and Bambi

old-man.gif (55478 bytes)
Compañero Señor Yämamoto

ashhar.jpg (9068 bytes)
Dexter Fong

newelayne.jpg (15.1 kbytes)

Bubba's Brain.jpg (6600 bytes)
Bubba's Brain

Bightrethighrehighre.jpg (6600 bytes)

boney.jpg (20600 bytes)

llan.jpg (13200 bytes)

tweeny.jpg (12588 bytes)

3rdmate.jpg (23157 bytes)

peggy.jpg (5240 bytes)
Peggy Blisswhips

audrey.jpg (4873 bytes)
Audrey Farber

tdt.jpg (6077 bytes)
Tiny Dr. Tim
Rest In Peace, Dear Friend

capeklok.jpg (5469 bytes)
404 - Not Found, Not Forgotten

And, "The Home Team"